DarkHorseRising
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1:14 PM DarkHorseRising commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: My Loving Wife, The Dicktease.
@52, if all rivers run to the ocean (PIV), and PIV hurts, I am not surprised if she isn't down with the repertoire. I give kudos to DS for recognizing that always being f*ked isn't the most awesome.

I don't mean to be harsh to LW by what I am going to say, but his letter is about him not getting his. It really isn't about how much he misses giving her head. Now, absolutely he should have that desire. He does care also she enjoys her self, and she shouldn't shut off the spigot. I don't think he's a bad bad boy (unless he likes that *cracks whip*) for feeling that way. That is completely human.

But depending how long this has gone on, she could have been trained to think that all roads lead to - ahum - Rome*.

If maybe he demonstrates that it isn't all going in that direction, the wife may start reacting differently. I donno, just a thought. He won't cheat and he won't run around. So the only option is working with the wife.

* Another cliche? Rivers? Roads?
7:37 AM DarkHorseRising commented on A Conversation With a #BernieOrBuster About Dinner.
@77. There is little validity to those polls that Sanders had a better shot than Clinton beating Trump. If he couldn't win over the majority of the democratic party....

No one dug into Sanders past that much. And there is much to dig. It would have happened once he received the nomination.
7:14 AM DarkHorseRising commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: My Loving Wife, The Dicktease.
I really disagree with those reading such malice into the wife's actions. I also am pretty annoyed about the nasty "cock tease" comments toward her as well, and that goes for you too, LW.

1. If the woman was a highly sexual woman for years, she is likely in a habit of sexual innuendo and contact. I would ask LW whether she is actually changed. Or, was she always like this and he has only noticed now because he isn't getting sex as much as he'd like. As a once highly sexual woman, she always acted/spoke like that, and she continues to do so without a lot of thought as to him and without the intent to hurt LW or convey a false image. To her, this is who she is.

A female friend of mine is a gal up there in the top 10% of sexual drive. And sex was never far from her mind. She has lupus and sadly went through a very terrible time of renal failure. Obviously, that killed her ability to follow through on sex. But she never stopped talking about sex or goosing her husband or flirting with guys. Was she a tease? Was she presenting a false front? I would argue no. She was being her true self: a highly sexual woman who was out of the game due to physical issues. She ultimately received a kidney transplant and definitely her sex life took an uptick, but its probably not where it ever was before.

And truly, if LW had a penis that didn't want to become erect, would he be a tease if he still tried to give his wife sexual touch? Kissed the back of her neck, squeeze her butt? I really want to unpack this, because I really hate the "tease."

What? When I walk into my husband's office and squeeze his crotch mean that I am required to drop trou' that second and let him go to town? Maybe I am just taking a break on my way to the bathroom and trying to convey to him that I still love him, still find touching him desirable.

What? When I let a man fondle my breasts and kiss me, I am required to sleep with him? Um. No.

What? Is the only thing valuable for sexual touching PIV or Blow jobs? It doesn't count unless the man gets to orgasm?

I think DS called it right. Take PIV off the table and experience the non-PIV mutual sexual satisfaction. I hear people saying, well she isn't telling him what she wants or she doesn't have erectile dysfunction! But reading the comments above should demonstrate that women can have the same kind of problems at menopause that equates to erectile dysfunction. Pain, discomfort, dryness, etc. Problems with fluctuating hormones. The issue is, as always with women's sexuality, its presentation is more subtle because women don't have the magic wand barometer to signal sexual interest. And think how ashamed men get over that and want to address it.

2. Look LW, I am utterly sympathetic. Believe you me, I am really sympathetic. My sex life with my husband right now is terminal because of some physical issues. And, I am still very much in high gear sexually. But the sex we can have right now is piss poor, and i don't want it. I want sex, but not that sex, because it sucks.

But if you are GGG, don't automatically assume she realizes your concerns or that she's being a tease. I do acknowledge that spouses owe each other sexual satisfaction and license. I do realize it hurts to get wound up by the sexy talk and then shot down. You sound like a great guy, which makes me hopeful you can get to a mutually agreeable place with her. But don't go in resentful, don't try and make her jealous, don't be mean. If you want to fix this, you have to get to the root of the problem - why is she not feeling it? Is it physical? Is it mental? And why is she talking about it if she isn't interested in it? Get thee to a sex positive therapist and yes, expand the repertoire beyond PIV.

I am talking to you because you are who wrote in and the one with the problem. But I am not letting her off the hook. She needs to use her words as well. You should not be alone in this.

But take the words tease off the table, please.
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Jul 26 DarkHorseRising commented on A Conversation With a #BernieOrBuster About Dinner.
Seriously knock it off and stop baiting the sanders types
Jul 25 DarkHorseRising commented on Revolution Now Eating Its Own: Bernie Supporters Boo Bernie Sanders.
Sorry. That was supposed to be 67.

BTW no one with serious foreign policy experience, no matter red or blue, supports trump. He is an international disaster.
Jul 25 DarkHorseRising commented on Revolution Now Eating Its Own: Bernie Supporters Boo Bernie Sanders.
@39.

Nope. Where do you guys live? I live in Georrrrgia. I know, back woods red, but a big chunk of the country will never go for Bernie. Your "best chance" was "no chance." Shrug. Why do you think Trump wanted him instead of Clinton.
Jul 25 DarkHorseRising commented on Revolution Now Eating Its Own: Bernie Supporters Boo Bernie Sanders.
@29.

Please add in an excellent Supreme Court decision that turned back the insidious erosion of the right to choose.

And even if it was just gay rights (huge) and cannibis (so it doesn't count unless it effects you?), those were tremendous strides especially in light of the amazing obstruction of congress. You can add in Obamacare as well.

As to "the economy, stupid," (to quote Clinton, B.) yes I agree we still have wage stagnation, which is likely a systemic issue due to automation as well as globalization, none of which is going away. However, our economy is in much better shape than the rest of the developed world, including Europe. These things are relative. Even if the advancement of the progressive agenda is not what you or i would like, its a far better cry than turning it over to Trump.

This is one of the first elections where I have been honestly scared.
Jul 25 DarkHorseRising commented on Revolution Now Eating Its Own: Bernie Supporters Boo Bernie Sanders.
@34.
Schip.
Policy Wonk.
Long political experience.
Impressive ground work setting up this run, including pulling in all those d@mned super delegates.
Her constituency in New York thought she was great.
Demolished Benghazi hearings in marathon testimony.
Has the respect of the demo-office holders by and large.
Stood up to a two year long attack by the republicans when it became clear she was going to run again.
Stood up to years of attacks from the republicans as being part of the "clinton machine."
Impressive credentials prior to becoming arkansas first lady.