Sep 12, 2009
sootmouth commented on Savage Love Letters of the Day.
I'm not trying to be snarky here. I really had this attack of curiosity. Do asexuals masterbate?
Information answering this question - and so many more - can be found on the FAQ page at AVEN.
http://www.asexuality.org/home/general.h…
Google is your friend.
Information answering this question - and so many more - can be found on the FAQ page at AVEN.
http://www.asexuality.org/home/general.h…
Google is your friend.
Sep 12, 2009
sootmouth commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day.
I don't think having a low sex drive doesn't make you asexual. You STILL have sex - it's just less of it.
Sorry but double negatives often confuse me. Are you saying that having a low sex drive does or doesn't make you asexual?
The term "asexual" implies NO sex - not a little, or a smidgeon, but NONE. I mean, pardon me for taking words at their face value.
You can't take the term asexual as it's used in this context at its "face value" (by which I think you mean by its biological definition). In the context of human sexual orientation - which is the subject that is under discussion - it refers to someone who doesn't experience sexual attraction.
There are a heap of people out there - asexuals included - how aren't that struck on the term "asexual", just like the people I know that don't like the terms "gay" or "queer". Unfortunately for all these folks the terms have become entrenched and it looks like they're just going to have to run with them.
Sorry but double negatives often confuse me. Are you saying that having a low sex drive does or doesn't make you asexual?
The term "asexual" implies NO sex - not a little, or a smidgeon, but NONE. I mean, pardon me for taking words at their face value.
You can't take the term asexual as it's used in this context at its "face value" (by which I think you mean by its biological definition). In the context of human sexual orientation - which is the subject that is under discussion - it refers to someone who doesn't experience sexual attraction.
There are a heap of people out there - asexuals included - how aren't that struck on the term "asexual", just like the people I know that don't like the terms "gay" or "queer". Unfortunately for all these folks the terms have become entrenched and it looks like they're just going to have to run with them.
Sep 11, 2009
sootmouth commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day.
MT3 @42 wrote "I'd be more likely to take this Asexual "movement" serious if the person heading it was in their 40's or 50's, and has had the chance to live different types of sexual experiences, and then based on their general non-interest of sex through all of that determined that they were Asexual."
Isn't this just a variation of "it's just a phase" / "you just haven't met the right person" that is frequently aimed at ALL sexual minorities?
Is it right to dismiss or doubt a person's chosen identity because you don't think they've "had the chance to live different types of sexual experiences?" If so, then it follows that everyone - hetero-, bi-, homo- and a-sexual - should try out a certain number of experiences before deciding on their identity. What exactly should these experiences be?
I'm 43 years old (is this old enough for you MT3?) and have known I was A since I was 13. I know that it can take time for young people to work out which labels (if any) suit them best but to call into question a person's sexual identity just because of their age is patronizing and short sighted.
More...
Isn't this just a variation of "it's just a phase" / "you just haven't met the right person" that is frequently aimed at ALL sexual minorities?
Is it right to dismiss or doubt a person's chosen identity because you don't think they've "had the chance to live different types of sexual experiences?" If so, then it follows that everyone - hetero-, bi-, homo- and a-sexual - should try out a certain number of experiences before deciding on their identity. What exactly should these experiences be?
I'm 43 years old (is this old enough for you MT3?) and have known I was A since I was 13. I know that it can take time for young people to work out which labels (if any) suit them best but to call into question a person's sexual identity just because of their age is patronizing and short sighted.
Sep 10, 2009
sootmouth commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day.
@ 38 "That's easily within the number of self-closeted gays not to mention all the other sexualities and fetishes and painful histories that might make asexuality a more comfortable self-identity."
Of course the figure will also be influenced by the self-closeted asexuals who find hetero, bi and homo sexualities a more comfortable self identity.
Of course the figure will also be influenced by the self-closeted asexuals who find hetero, bi and homo sexualities a more comfortable self identity.
Sep 10, 2009
sootmouth commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day.
@38 "Asexuals claim they're 3% of the population."
The figure that is usually quoted is 1% - it comes from the analysis of a large (18,876 participants) sex survey in the UK.
You can read the full journal article at:
http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m2…
The figure that is usually quoted is 1% - it comes from the analysis of a large (18,876 participants) sex survey in the UK.
You can read the full journal article at:
http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m2…
Sep 10, 2009
sootmouth commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day.
NCA wrote "I'm not saying that every person who identifies as asexual must be in the same position I was, not at all, but based on my personal experience I do find it very likely that many asexuals are actually "turned off" towards their sexuality for some other, unhealthy reason."
Lorran @21 wrote "Nowhere did NCA say that all asexuals are just maladjusted and sexually confused."
The word I find difficult in NCA's quote is "many". Based on his own personal experience (the experience of a single person) he concludes that many asexuals are turned off their sexuality.
His experience of identifying, and then not identifying, as asexual is not unique. However my own observation, after meeting / interacting with other asexuals over the past 5 years, is that this particular experience is rare.
"Some" would have been a better word to use.
Lorran @21 wrote "Nowhere did NCA say that all asexuals are just maladjusted and sexually confused."
The word I find difficult in NCA's quote is "many". Based on his own personal experience (the experience of a single person) he concludes that many asexuals are turned off their sexuality.
His experience of identifying, and then not identifying, as asexual is not unique. However my own observation, after meeting / interacting with other asexuals over the past 5 years, is that this particular experience is rare.
"Some" would have been a better word to use.
Sep 10, 2009
sootmouth commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day.
"If someone masturbates to a fantasy about centaurs, they ARE still sexual, even if they'll never be able to find a real centaur and can't feel aroused unless a centaur is involved."
The term "asexual" is used to describe a person's orientation NOT their entire sexuality.
Some asexuals masturbate / fantasize and so consider themselves sexual, others don't. The common link is the lack of sexual attraction to other people.
The term "asexual" is used to describe a person's orientation NOT their entire sexuality.
Some asexuals masturbate / fantasize and so consider themselves sexual, others don't. The common link is the lack of sexual attraction to other people.
Sep 6, 2009
sootmouth commented on Asexuality for Beginners.
Looking forward to getting a-bashed by Harriet at the next parade I take part it....
And Harriet, for the record, who are you to say who can or who can't identify as queer? Has someone created an official Queer Club (and made you chairperson for life of course) while I wasn't looking?
And Harriet, for the record, who are you to say who can or who can't identify as queer? Has someone created an official Queer Club (and made you chairperson for life of course) while I wasn't looking?
Sep 3, 2009
sootmouth commented on Asexuality for Beginners.
Jade wrote "I'm loathe to postulate here, but if forced, I'd bet my paycheck that--just like the rest of the population--asexuals who form long-term romantic attractions do so only with the opposite sex. I'd bet that 3-5% of asexuals form romantic attractions to those of the same sex. I'd bet that a small, annoying number go both ways (and gripe when they feel neglected)*. This is all conjecture, but I'd bet my paycheck on it."
I don't think there is any information on long term asexual relationships but the romantic orientation of aseuxals has been discussed on AVEN. There have been two polls, the results of which have been summarized below.
Hetero-romantic 35% / 42%
Homo-romantic 7% / 11%
Bi-Romantic 16% / 24%
A-Romantic 20% / 15%
Pan-Romantic 14%
Other 7% / 8%
http://www.asexuality.org/en/index.php?s…
I don't think there is any information on long term asexual relationships but the romantic orientation of aseuxals has been discussed on AVEN. There have been two polls, the results of which have been summarized below.
Hetero-romantic 35% / 42%
Homo-romantic 7% / 11%
Bi-Romantic 16% / 24%
A-Romantic 20% / 15%
Pan-Romantic 14%
Other 7% / 8%
http://www.asexuality.org/en/index.php?s…
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Asexuality isn't voluntary - it's an orientation like hetero-,bi- and homo- sexualities.
Perhaps you're confusing asexuality with celibacy?