Jan 4, 2012 Shaker commented on Savage Love.
Sex at Dawn is a great book on this I think, and I agree Monogamy is possible, and we did it for our first 15 years and were happy, but it is not natural, and I think were closer and more happy now. When the majority of relationships have cheating how can we say monogamy is the norm, apparently not. Funny thing is I have never cheated yet people would think we were strange if they knew we were soft swingers, even thought we have 20 very happy years together, but have a friend cheating and they think that is OK?
Jan 4, 2012 Shaker commented on Savage Love.
I live in the Bible Belt, been married 20 very happy years, and for the last 5 we have done a little soft swing play and gone to clubs. We already had great sex averaging 5 times a week but this has made it even better. Because it is not talked about much my wife use to worry how bad or wrong we were but now she sees how happy we are and how eveyone else has realtionship problems and we dont, so it is easier. But I really wish it would get more out in the public eye to show people swingers are not only normal, but very happy and solid. I hope my 3 daughters when they find a husband can have as good of commuication and happy relationship as we have, and if that means they try it too, then good for them, but we will never tell them about us. Also it funny the people we know who we have found out or ran into at the club, its everywhere just no one is talking. Thanks for bringing it out more.
Oct 13, 2010 Shaker commented on Savage Love.
I appreciate your reply to LR, I am straight christian and married for 18 years. I have fortunately grown as I have aged. When i was young I too was confused by what I heard in church and from friends, fortunately my parents never said anything and allowed me grow up to form my own decision. Now my children are totally open to everyone. We have taught them that we are all equal and the only thing that matters is if you are a good person with a good heart. Black, white, gay, straight, rich or poor, that does not matter. Since I am not gay I can not feel your pain, but I try through talking to people to at least change others minds for the future, and I am proud my kids feel the same. I have over the years found it harder to go to church because I feel there are to many hypocrites, which I hate that.
Good Luck...Baker
Oct 13, 2010 Shaker joined My Stranger Face
Nov 6, 2009 Shaker commented on Savage Love.
My wife too had only had oral when we first met, yet I was very experienced. Now 17 years later she is still the best I ever had and we still have great sex 4 to 5 times a week. Thing is we communicate what we like and work to make the other happy, which they then return the favor. In a way it always makes me feel good that she was inexperianced, that way I got to show her the pleasures, she now has came up with a few new ones herself..