Queen City of the West
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In my Early 60's Raised RC now agnostic Lutheran Self employed, married, Kids and G-… more »

sb53 is once agin at work, this time MAKING eyeglass frames .
Feb 7 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
Monday night TV on natgeo channel had a 2 hour exploration of transgender culture. I did pick up much of the language that the TG use but was a bit disappointed overall. Katie Couric seemed impelled to be cute and smiley at all times and did not try very hard to dig a little deeper into exactly why these folks wanted to change their sexual identities. One of the theories revolved around the fetus being exposed to testosterone in utero but they did not even ask how the "T" (as they referred to it) appears at that critical moment. The net effect is that I more confused after this 2 hour show than I was before.
Feb 1 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
I lived a similar situation many decades ago.
In my situation, wifey wanted me to go along with a platonic relationship outside of our union;..she was confused at "being in love with two men at the same time" was the way she described it.
WE began talking about it regularly and all the while still had good sex and communicated well. Then her relationship became an intimate one and I began to fear that she would leave me and take my kids. At that point I panicked and asked my boss for an out-of-state job transfer.
She went along with the move, and had some issues over separation from the other guy, but still was committed to our marriage.
Years later she admitted: "I could never have ended that affair if we had not moved away".
I will never know how that situation would have ended if I had not panicked.
FORTDA need to have some long talks with his love to establish what his girl is seeking, if she even knows yet.
She may resemble my situation where she finds herself in a complicated emotional area before she has a solid grasp of what her intimate needs are.
Jan 27 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
Dear Auntie
Re "Eggs"
I seem recall reading somewhere years ago that in some cultures the testicles are indeed referred to as eggs. In the instance I recall the usage was slang.
Also on this topic, when I "discovered" my body around age 12/13 I recall feeling them and imagining their shape as egg-like. Not chicken-sized but maybe more robins=egg size???
Dec 27, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
@96 Philo you are correct, it was indeed too indirect. I may propose a discussion about this weeks letters again though. We are leaving to visit family in sunny Florida for a week and many times Miss N. will entertain a spot of heavy breathing in advance because she simply NEVER entertains anything like that while away from home.
Ahem "Hope doth ever spring eternal"
Dec 23, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
Love Dan's advice this week, especially to Fomoof. "Unless you are shoving your feet into his mouth to shut him up".... hysterical!
Seriously though I definitely am making fomoof a conversation topic on "date night" this week with my Miss N.
I will stress Dan's advice that couples should discuss fetishes (his and hers) as well as possible future adventures and suchlike. I have no great hope of learning anything but this is a way to move the conversation topic to sex indirectly. heh heh.
Where would I be without S.L.?
Dec 15, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
The election has changed my routine;
I no longer watch the 10 O clock news, because very night there is some prediction of what "President-elect- combover" is going to do (or has already tweeted).
My beloved miss N. has been depressed which has not helped our intimate life.
I finally scheduled a one-hour massage therapy session.
My therapist spent half the time expounding on how great things were going to be with Prez combover in the white house.
Now I have to find a new M-T. sigh.
Perhaps when spring comes and a new bright growing season appears this gray funk will lift.
Nov 30, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
Re: fiddling
My daughter dated a man while she was in college and he was a habitual penis-fiddler. (not "taking it out", but through his pants).
Daughter and Miss N. asked me to say something to him. I took aside and asked:..
"what is up with the fiddling?"
Answer: "It sticks to my thigh"
My answer was twofold: "Either switch underwear to briefs or else invest in a large can of baby powder. Or just STOP DOING THAT". He stopped doing it.
Re: blow job man
Many women (my miss N. for instance) see the BJ not the way I do as simple foreplay, BUT as a power/dominance thing.
If her opinion of this act is negative, then my advice is to let it go (believe me you have no choice anyway) but use the topic as a way to inquire about other interesting NON-BJ-but-still-fun things to do with your naughty bits. Good luck!
RE: Dry hump
change your attitude. I read Lady Chatterly's lover and the goofball dude was hung up on whether he or his lady was on top!! Good grief your Having SEX MAN! Forget the "rules' in your thick head and enjoy. FURTHERMORE
#1:..Be happy she is orgasmic!
#2 ...switch to silk underwear on date will both enjoy this.
#3 ...there is no "right" nor "wrong" way to orgasm, IMHO she is not "doing it wrong" get your mind right!
Nov 25, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
In our many years of "holy deadlock" (thanks Archie bunker) WE accumulated numerous toys. Some of them plugged in, some of them a person would wear, some ran on batteries and some were just well, interestingly-shaped things.
Sadly, Most have been thrown away, and the suitcase toybox is now a small briefcase toybox. The one toy that is used year in and year out is the hitachi magic wand and her accessories. Ours is developing an electrical short and must soon be replaced. Considering the cordless, but hate to take any chances in this important area.
Re Auntie G
@33 YUM! I did not overeat Auntie Griz and still have an appetite!
Nov 11, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
@49 Auntie
I learned that one of my (otherwise-respected) customers (also a PHD-holder) voted for dt. His explanation is EXACTLY the one given by the Prussian elites after their election in 1932:..."It's OK;...we can CONTROL HIM and prevent bad things from happening" . Poof! 100 million people dead within 13 years:... one of them my uncle Roy in a burning B-24.
All I can do about my PHD customer is to recall what Tony Soprano said about a lieutenant of his who broke one of his rules:..."I can't change what you did, but I gotta tax ya". I have had to make some price adjustments for this guy. As for America:..the Universe is going to have to intervene or it will get real bad real fast. It keeps me awake at night:
Congress, the prez, and next the Supreme court.
Oct 28, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
@75 Thnx E.P. In the years of reading and writing here on SL I have learned a lot about myself and how I look at my relationship. You, Dan and others writing here brought me out of me looking at the marriage from my perspective only, and rather giving her position equal weight. Not easy to do since she does not like to talk about our sex life.
This rhythm (thanks for that word) makes me feel sexy when she wants it, and I don't feel rejected in between times.