Queen City of the West
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In my Early 60's Raised RC now agnostic Lutheran Self employed, married, Kids and G-… more »

sb53 is once agin at work, this time MAKING eyeglass frames .
Dec 27, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
@96 Philo you are correct, it was indeed too indirect. I may propose a discussion about this weeks letters again though. We are leaving to visit family in sunny Florida for a week and many times Miss N. will entertain a spot of heavy breathing in advance because she simply NEVER entertains anything like that while away from home.
Ahem "Hope doth ever spring eternal"
Dec 23, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
Love Dan's advice this week, especially to Fomoof. "Unless you are shoving your feet into his mouth to shut him up".... hysterical!
Seriously though I definitely am making fomoof a conversation topic on "date night" this week with my Miss N.
I will stress Dan's advice that couples should discuss fetishes (his and hers) as well as possible future adventures and suchlike. I have no great hope of learning anything but this is a way to move the conversation topic to sex indirectly. heh heh.
Where would I be without S.L.?
Dec 15, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
The election has changed my routine;
I no longer watch the 10 O clock news, because very night there is some prediction of what "President-elect- combover" is going to do (or has already tweeted).
My beloved miss N. has been depressed which has not helped our intimate life.
I finally scheduled a one-hour massage therapy session.
My therapist spent half the time expounding on how great things were going to be with Prez combover in the white house.
Now I have to find a new M-T. sigh.
Perhaps when spring comes and a new bright growing season appears this gray funk will lift.
Nov 30, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
Re: fiddling
My daughter dated a man while she was in college and he was a habitual penis-fiddler. (not "taking it out", but through his pants).
Daughter and Miss N. asked me to say something to him. I took aside and asked:..
"what is up with the fiddling?"
Answer: "It sticks to my thigh"
My answer was twofold: "Either switch underwear to briefs or else invest in a large can of baby powder. Or just STOP DOING THAT". He stopped doing it.
Re: blow job man
Many women (my miss N. for instance) see the BJ not the way I do as simple foreplay, BUT as a power/dominance thing.
If her opinion of this act is negative, then my advice is to let it go (believe me you have no choice anyway) but use the topic as a way to inquire about other interesting NON-BJ-but-still-fun things to do with your naughty bits. Good luck!
RE: Dry hump
change your attitude. I read Lady Chatterly's lover and the goofball dude was hung up on whether he or his lady was on top!! Good grief your Having SEX MAN! Forget the "rules' in your thick head and enjoy. FURTHERMORE
#1:..Be happy she is orgasmic!
#2 ...switch to silk underwear on date will both enjoy this.
#3 ...there is no "right" nor "wrong" way to orgasm, IMHO she is not "doing it wrong" get your mind right!
Nov 25, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
In our many years of "holy deadlock" (thanks Archie bunker) WE accumulated numerous toys. Some of them plugged in, some of them a person would wear, some ran on batteries and some were just well, interestingly-shaped things.
Sadly, Most have been thrown away, and the suitcase toybox is now a small briefcase toybox. The one toy that is used year in and year out is the hitachi magic wand and her accessories. Ours is developing an electrical short and must soon be replaced. Considering the cordless, but hate to take any chances in this important area.
Re Auntie G
@33 YUM! I did not overeat Auntie Griz and still have an appetite!
Nov 11, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
@49 Auntie
I learned that one of my (otherwise-respected) customers (also a PHD-holder) voted for dt. His explanation is EXACTLY the one given by the Prussian elites after their election in 1932:..."It's OK;...we can CONTROL HIM and prevent bad things from happening" . Poof! 100 million people dead within 13 years:... one of them my uncle Roy in a burning B-24.
All I can do about my PHD customer is to recall what Tony Soprano said about a lieutenant of his who broke one of his rules:..."I can't change what you did, but I gotta tax ya". I have had to make some price adjustments for this guy. As for America:..the Universe is going to have to intervene or it will get real bad real fast. It keeps me awake at night:
Congress, the prez, and next the Supreme court.
Oct 28, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
@75 Thnx E.P. In the years of reading and writing here on SL I have learned a lot about myself and how I look at my relationship. You, Dan and others writing here brought me out of me looking at the marriage from my perspective only, and rather giving her position equal weight. Not easy to do since she does not like to talk about our sex life.
This rhythm (thanks for that word) makes me feel sexy when she wants it, and I don't feel rejected in between times.
Oct 28, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
@60 RE: Keaton Yes she did sing in a cabaret! I always laugh at Woody's nebbish roles and well -written dialogue but I have to side with my Miss N. on his creepy incest.
Re: LW-1 After decades of "Holy Deadlock" (thanks Archie Bunker) we have settled into "date night" a couple times each month. In the "needy times" in between I must cope by myself or seek professional help for an hour here or there. I have also come to believe that it is not a question of having chosen the wrong wife, I think that it simply the accumulation of time and, for whatever reason, "mis-matched libidos" . Instead of placing blame or attempting to figure out the "why", I simply accept that ....."it is what it is" and do the best I can going forward.
The two things I have ruled out is to ever have another affair or seek a divorce. This seems to work OK.
Oct 27, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
Re LW-1 After I read this letter I immediately thought of the scene in Annie Hall where Diane Keaton complains to her therapist:..."We have sex all the time!... like 3 times a week".
The next scene is Woody in his therapist's office:..."We hardly ever have sex! Maybe 3 times per week".
Oct 13, 2016 sb53 commented on Savage Love.
@ 46 Re: fetishes
I once worked as a "floater" to fill in 3 days per week for retail shop managers on their various days off. In one shop every single Wednesday, I would get a phone call from a person (sounded like a male) who would ask about my footwear. What type of socks I wore, what color, how high up on my calf they came, how many pair of shoes I had, and what colors etc.. Apparently he had visited the shop unidentified and my footwear was attractive. He was very polite and courteous. (these were the days of landlines) At first I would hang up on him/her but he would just call back. Eventually it was easier to just let him finish his inquiries and then he would not call back.
I left that company and never heard from him again.
Humans have odd things imprinted on them. I still get aroused if I smell a certain Avon fragrance (Sable-and-sand I believe). Not sure where that comes from.