TMI
- God is: an invertibrate
- Tushy or Tuchus
- What do you like to read when you poop?: advice columns
- If you could bring one dead person back to life, who would it be?: that would be gross with the rotting flesh, etc.
- Dicks or Vaginas
Jan 16
bbbbbb commented on Savage Love.
I agree that the blindfold is the best suggestion. [Just turning out the lights is even cheaper. Have him lie in the dark wearing "relax in the evening" clothes, come in, undress each other in the dark while kissing/groping, explore, and have sex.]
Remember that erotic is in the mind and props are just one way to excite the mind. The toys may be physically exciting, but the danger is becoming fixated on the toys/props/scenes instead of the partner - eventually, the partner can become just a prop holder and no longer a lover. The fact that you are lovers must drive whatever you do together.
Also, as for long time relationships getting monotonous, remember that if you communicate and pay attention to each other you get very good at doing exactly the position/move/joke/caress/etc. that excites them the most. I've been in a monogamous relationship for well over twenty-five years and most of what we do is what we discovered decades ago worked for us. We still try new things and joke about ridiculous (to us) possibilities, but usually we end up with the "boring" same old things because they work so well.
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Remember that erotic is in the mind and props are just one way to excite the mind. The toys may be physically exciting, but the danger is becoming fixated on the toys/props/scenes instead of the partner - eventually, the partner can become just a prop holder and no longer a lover. The fact that you are lovers must drive whatever you do together.
Also, as for long time relationships getting monotonous, remember that if you communicate and pay attention to each other you get very good at doing exactly the position/move/joke/caress/etc. that excites them the most. I've been in a monogamous relationship for well over twenty-five years and most of what we do is what we discovered decades ago worked for us. We still try new things and joke about ridiculous (to us) possibilities, but usually we end up with the "boring" same old things because they work so well.
Jun 20, 2012
bbbbbb commented on Savage Love.
Dear BOOB,
I have the cutest puppy in the world and my girlfriend loves to play with him. I'm worried because when we walk in the park my girlfriend looks at the other dogs in the park - sometimes she even pets them! Does this mean that she doesn't love my puppy? Should I dump her now before she hurts my puppy?
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My wife lets me look at other women's bodies (discretely) as much as I want, but I'm only allowed to play with hers. Same for her looking at other men's bodies.
I have the cutest puppy in the world and my girlfriend loves to play with him. I'm worried because when we walk in the park my girlfriend looks at the other dogs in the park - sometimes she even pets them! Does this mean that she doesn't love my puppy? Should I dump her now before she hurts my puppy?
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My wife lets me look at other women's bodies (discretely) as much as I want, but I'm only allowed to play with hers. Same for her looking at other men's bodies.
Mar 10, 2010
bbbbbb answered a bunch of weird questions about himself or herself.
Mar 10, 2010
bbbbbb joined My Stranger Face
Mar 10, 2010
bbbbbb commented on Savage Love.
Michael Jr. is right about the first thing SAD needs to do. APOLOGIZE!
BUT, the comment:
"And that you're going to go to counseling and does he think he has the patience to bear with you for a while longer while you try to improve?"
is not quite right - while the offer for him to keep communication open if HE really wants to is OK, if he does, then there needs to be some joint counseling.
I had a long term relationship that had serious problems and we stayed in touch after the breakup. The most important thing is that she dealt with some personal problems and shared it with me. It was similar to counseling without a therapist. It helped me understand what happened and also helped me deal with some of my own issues that contributed to the relationship friction.
BUT, the comment:
"And that you're going to go to counseling and does he think he has the patience to bear with you for a while longer while you try to improve?"
is not quite right - while the offer for him to keep communication open if HE really wants to is OK, if he does, then there needs to be some joint counseling.
I had a long term relationship that had serious problems and we stayed in touch after the breakup. The most important thing is that she dealt with some personal problems and shared it with me. It was similar to counseling without a therapist. It helped me understand what happened and also helped me deal with some of my own issues that contributed to the relationship friction.
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As for the engagement ring - make one last attempt to avoid the expensive one. Try to find something silly/exotic/personal/etc. that would be special without being expensive.
My wife treasures her engagement ring - it took two dimes to get it when I went down on one knee to propose in the grocery store. She loves telling the story. [And I get to pipe in with the follow-up story about having to spend SEVEN dimes to get a replacement after she lost it.]