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pleasedancewithme
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Mar 11, 2010 pleasedancewithme commented on High School in Mississippi Cancels Prom to Prevent Lesbian Student from Bringing Female Date—and Potentially Incites Violence Against Lesbian Student.
This is what I wrote:

My name is Mallory Baim. I am twenty four years old. I am bisexual.

In 2003 I asked my girlfriend to go to our high school's prom with me. She said "no," because she didn't want to tell her parents that she was a lesbian. So - a male friend came to prom as my date, and another male friend went to prom as her date. It sometimes still hurts to think about it. That in Scarsdale, New York in 2003 a girl could be scared to attend a high school prom with the person she is in love with, because of how it might affect other people. That was seven years ago. Until today, I truly believed that things were changing. I am sad to find out that I was wrong.

I am proud of Constance McMillen for being brave enough to attend prom with her girlfriend.
I am ashamed that a school would go as far as to cancel the entire prom just to make sure that this wouldn't happen.

I was raised to believe that I should be proud of who I am, no matter what that was. I was raised to believe that I should never hide myself in order to satisfy other people. I was raised to believe that everyone is equal. I was raised to believe that anyone (or any institution) who told me I couldn't be who I am; was wrong. I was raised to believe that I didn't need these people in my life.

Unfortunately, when it comes to high school, you can't exactly choose where you go. But you can, at the very least, expect the high school you attend to nurture you and help you grow. In canceling its prom, because a young woman wants the world to know who she is, Itawamba Agricultural High School is doing the exact opposite. K-12 schooling is supposed to be about giving children the tools they need to grow up and become a successful human being. Scarsdale High School taught me that no matter how many times I failed, there would always be someone there for me, saying "I believe in you." Everybody, absolutely everybody, deserves the chance to be believed in. I am so grateful that the tools I learned in high school didn't involve learning that I could be punished, that I could get a large group of people punished, simply for being who I am.

That is not the kind of lesson that should be taught in any high school. A lot of children are unsure and potentially afraid to stand up for themselves. Anyone who is able to say to the world "Hello! This is who I am!" should be revered, not punished. That is what I've learned in this world and that is what I want my children to learn.

Children have brought guns to school, shot, and killed other students because people made fun of them. Because they felt like they didn't fit in. To feel that way because of your peers is one thing. To have the school, the institution itself, flat out tell you that you don't fit in, and take an action that insures the students will feel the same way... I can't imagine how that would feel. It should be the institution's responsibility to make sure that students never feel that way, not to actively make that happen. Constance McMillen may be strong enough to not feel that way. But that doesn't mean that any other student in a similar situation would be that strong. Studies have shows that gay, lesbian, and bisexual youth are more likely to attempt suicide than heterosexual youth because they are discriminated against in a way that heterosexual youth wouldn't be able to understand. Is that really something you want to risk? Is that a message you really want to send? In taking such a harsh action, you are setting a precedent. Other schools will see this happening, and they will believe that it is okay for them to take such an action. Gay, lesbian, and bisexual youth have enough being thrown at them, just for being who they are, because ignorant people believe that homosexuality is an aberration. Being told this by an institution is just adding fuel to the fire. No human being has a right to judge another in this way. Passing this kind of judgment is not the reason schools exist. Passing this kind of judgment is not a humane way to treat anyone. Passing this kind of judgment will only propel the bigotry that already exists in this world. Who knows what will happen with the next child who is judged this way. We already went through this with jews, people of color, and almost every minority that exists in a given place. Do we really need to go through it all again in order to remember what happens? I really hope we don't.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.
I hope you re-assess your decision in order to allow every child to live their own life and be true to themself.

Sincerely,
Mallory Baim
More...
Mar 11, 2010 pleasedancewithme commented on High School in Mississippi Cancels Prom to Prevent Lesbian Student from Bringing Female Date—and Potentially Incites Violence Against Lesbian Student.
This is what I wrote:

My name is Mallory Baim. I am twenty four years old. I am bisexual.

In 2003 I asked my girlfriend to go to our high school's prom with me. She said "no," because she didn't want to tell her parents that she was a lesbian. So - a male friend came to prom as my date, and another male friend went to prom as her date. It sometimes still hurts to think about it. That in Scarsdale, New York in 2003 a girl could be scared to attend a high school prom with the person she is in love with, because of how it might affect other people. That was seven years ago. Until today, I truly believed that things were changing. I am sad to find out that I was wrong.

I am proud of Constance McMillen for being brave enough to attend prom with her girlfriend.
I am ashamed that a school would go as far as to cancel the entire prom just to make sure that this wouldn't happen.

I was raised to believe that I should be proud of who I am, no matter what that was. I was raised to believe that I should never hide myself in order to satisfy other people. I was raised to believe that everyone is equal. I was raised to believe that anyone (or any institution) who told me I couldn't be who I am; was wrong. I was raised to believe that I didn't need these people in my life.

Unfortunately, when it comes to high school, you can't exactly choose where you go. But you can, at the very least, expect the high school you attend to nurture you and help you grow. In canceling its prom, because a young woman wants the world to know who she is, Itawamba Agricultural High School is doing the exact opposite. K-12 schooling is supposed to be about giving children the tools they need to grow up and become a successful human being. Scarsdale High School taught me that no matter how many times I failed, there would always be someone there for me, saying "I believe in you." Everybody, absolutely everybody, deserves the chance to be believed in. I am so grateful that the tools I learned in high school didn't involve learning that I could be punished, that I could get a large group of people punished, simply for being who I am.

That is not the kind of lesson that should be taught in any high school. A lot of children are unsure and potentially afraid to stand up for themselves. Anyone who is able to say to the world "Hello! This is who I am!" should be revered, not punished. That is what I've learned in this world and that is what I want my children to learn.

Children have brought guns to school, shot, and killed other students because people made fun of them. Because they felt like they didn't fit in. To feel that way because of your peers is one thing. To have the school, the institution itself, flat out tell you that you don't fit in, and take an action that insures the students will feel the same way... I can't imagine how that would feel. It should be the institution's responsibility to make sure that students never feel that way, not to actively make that happen. Constance McMillen may be strong enough to not feel that way. But that doesn't mean that any other student in a similar situation would be that strong. Studies have shows that gay, lesbian, and bisexual youth are more likely to attempt suicide than heterosexual youth because they are discriminated against in a way that heterosexual youth wouldn't be able to understand. Is that really something you want to risk? Is that a message you really want to send? In taking such a harsh action, you are setting a precedent. Other schools will see this happening, and they will believe that it is okay for them to take such an action. Gay, lesbian, and bisexual youth have enough being thrown at them, just for being who they are, because ignorant people believe that homosexuality is an aberration. Being told this by an institution is just adding fuel to the fire. No human being has a right to judge another in this way. Passing this kind of judgment is not the reason schools exist. Passing this kind of judgment is not a humane way to treat anyone. Passing this kind of judgment will only propel the bigotry that already exists in this world. Who knows what will happen with the next child who is judged this way. We already went through this with jews, people of color, and almost every minority that exists in a given place. Do we really need to go through it all again in order to remember what happens? I really hope we don't.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.
I hope you re-assess your decision in order to allow every child to live their own life and be true to themself.

Sincerely,
Mallory Baim
More...
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