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Mar 22, 2011 bargdorf commented on You Must Listen to the Latest Episode of the Moth Podcast.
Damn, that man is a strong man. Very tearful, very moving. Wow, the Moth...
Jul 8, 2010 bargdorf commented on Banning Children Pooping at the Farmers Market Versus "Accepting Our Natural Bodies".
At Ronin Park in Chicago, I have seen parents encouraging children as old as six to shit on trees(this is less than a mile from Blago's house.) There are also old men who take dumps along the canal. I have never walked barefoot in a Chicago park for these reasons.

Hippies and puritans can get worms and go to hell. Old and in the way both of you.
Apr 20, 2010 bargdorf commented on Metro Natural!.
I read in a very important powerful scientific journal that Mcdoughnalds was fighting the plastic bag epidemic by granulating the thin sheets and bonding those particles, chemically, to their food items. Not only does this lengthen the Macnuggets' and double chezburgers' shelf life, it also,

"Get's them their bags into those fat fucks gullets and not into those stupid faced whales and turtles."
-Wicked Ass Scientific Monthly
Apr 16, 2010 bargdorf commented on Aussie Racism Is Alive and Twittering.
@14 We can transcend our race problems when we all stop having impressionable/stoopid kids.

P.S. Bush was an awful idiot warmonger, and Obama's a total 'suave' creep, but I like him enough! Neither of them are as consistent or trustworthy as a coot! (or whatever animal you like best)
Apr 15, 2010 bargdorf commented on Hung On The Cross.
a four pack of fleshy-throbbin'-bloody-wine-coolers ready to burst! and there, I have reverted to age 13 for the rest of this beautiful spring day. Sppprrroing!

As a Jesuit educated Catholic quitter/slacker, thank you Dan!

Jesus' wang wept.
Apr 15, 2010 bargdorf commented on Hung On The Cross.
Hah hah! Jesus has a four-pack dong! A four pack of throbbin' bloody wine coolers... and I will stop now.
Apr 15, 2010 bargdorf commented on Crime in the Age of the Global.
blah blah blah video game porn blah computer program thievery blah transference of sexual impulses blah creeps with low social skills taken advantage of by blah blah blah.

get involved with things surrounded by trouble, get in trouble. oh, the poor poor pervs and teens who will have to wipe their hard drives clean.

my high horse might be super high,
but that doesn't mean I'm a furry,
nor high,
Apr 14, 2010 bargdorf commented on Today in Nacho Platters That Are Cakes.
I've liked cake ever since birthdays were invented, but why must all fondant be tasteless and all colors be chemically derived? oh where oh where is my organic-natural-tasty-cake-shop? Maybe I'll open my own called the Cake-Monger. No, I probably shouldn't do that.
Apr 14, 2010 bargdorf commented on More Penguins in the Hood.
I look forward to them mobilizing like the roving packs of dogs in certain Indian cities. Next up, flocks of penguins taking what they want, when they want, from unsuspecting fishmongers. Or maybe we have to domesticate penguins before they get that crafty? I am going to the zoo to get me a domestercated penguin right now.
Apr 14, 2010 bargdorf commented on This Is What the Seven-Foot-Tall Kangaroo Sounded Like....
he is the dingo that ate my baby.