Sep 29 agony commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: A Tweet Storm of Excellent Advice.
@ 14 "explicitly telling a woman that you're only interested in having sex with them"

A good place to start would be taking a long look at why this fits, in your mind, into the "not nice" category.

I think you might have some ideas about women and sex that were, admittedly, fed to you by the media, but that don't actually reflect reality.
Sep 27 agony commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Practically Married and Completely Sexless—And Want It To Stay That Way.
@ 3 that's pretty old research, and mostly based on people who had grown up in a less equal society. Newer studies don't show this.
I'm on my way out the door so can't cite studies just now - if you're interested, one of the latest Adam Ruins Everything podcasts with the marriage researcher goes into it a bit.
Sep 15 agony commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: He Wears Short Shorts.
I'm an editor on a website that uses user-submitted content.

This is not fake. It looks like about 25% of our submissions.

And it's not foreign. On the whole, submissions from people who do not have English as their first language are on par with those of native English speakers. You get a little unusual verb usage, and that's about it.
Sep 5 agony commented on Phyllis Schlafly.
@ 2 It's kooks and buffoons all the way down.
Sep 2 agony commented on Renting Prince Charming.
"dating shows are a kind of sex work"

Just thought this needed to be repeated.
Jul 12 agony commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Stray Text Message Outs Wrong Parent.
@4 Heh. A while ago I was making a joke while on the phone to my grown son, and said something that could have been taken to mean that I was proposing he have sex with me - which was NOT the meaning I had intended. The silence on the other end of the phone, followed by his very careful "Excuse me?" is something I'll never forget.
Jul 7 agony commented on Baker Refuses to Make a Cake for a Same-Sex Couple.
Around here, there are a lot of semi-professional cake bakers who operate out of their own kitchens (not sure how that squares with health regulations....) They're bakers, I suppose, but they don't actually have bakeries, if by bakery you mean an actual shop with actual ovens behind, and glass cases, and middle aged women with strong accents and mustaches to wait on you..... All the girls who were really good at crafts in Girl Guides, who are now home with kids and want to make a few extra bucks now and then, seem to be doing this.
Jun 18 agony commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Weeded Out.
Al anon.

It doesn't really matter if his weed use is a problem or not, because it is a problem for her. So she needs some help in finding clarity. Is it good for her to let go of this? Is there actually a problem that she isn't letting herself see about his weed use (or about his lying?)? Is the problem her behaviour, or his, or something in between? She needs to take the focus off of what he's doing, and put it on what she is doing - that will force a shift in the dynamic that will tell her a lot of things she really needs to know.
Jun 16 agony commented on Savage Love.
As an old fat woman who has had a couple of kids, I gotta say my response to someone who feels safe when wearing diapers is that this is not about sex, but about incontinence.

And that would account for his reticence, his reluctance to have her be part of this. He dribbles, he's uncomfortable about it, and sometimes he would like to feel that there is no chance of there being any evidence.
Jun 13 agony commented on Invitation Declined.
@ 38 Heh. I think that might be a situation for "I don't know, honey. So, who wants ice cream!?"