Not enough like Twitter.

Jun 4, 2011 Taffy commented on SL Letter of the Day: Phased Out.
I'm glad you pointed out that part at the bottom about how bi people in straight relationships should be out to everyone because I missed the post it was originally from. I'm in a relationship with a guy, but all my friends and my sister know that I'm bi. I haven't, however, told the rest of my family--although I'm sure my mom knows and just hasn't confronted me--but I've been getting closer and closer to it, and it almost pops out of my mouth then I decide not to. The fact that there are 12 year olds coming out, and I'm a 24-year-old chicken shit that can't tell her parents makes me feel like a loser, and besides, I'm at a point in my life where I'm tired of hiding who I am -- to anyone. A few weeks ago, I added my aunt to my Facebook, where I have it that I'm interested in men and women, and post things related to LGBT stuff here and there. I haven't heard from her and she hasn't returned my emails. . . Maybe that was wrong of me to do? I didn't want to privatize or delete half my interests "just in case". . . I don't know. I feel like a middle school kid all over again. Does anyone have some advice?
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May 31, 2011 Taffy commented on Not Something You Want to Read Sitting at the Breakfast Table Watching Your 13-Year-Old Son Eat a Bowl of Raspberries.
Oh my god. That poor child. This is utterly fucking horrifying and the most gruesome thing I have read in a long fucking time. . .
Feb 21, 2011 Taffy commented on SL Letter of the Day: The Sit & Spinster.
My ex-boyfriend went sort of nuts when his parents divorced (While he was in his early teens, I think), but he was fairly nuts to begin with.

I WISH my parents would divorce each other. I've wanted to them to since I was in elementary school. It would have saved a lot of anguish and hurt--for everyone, not just them. They're the most miserable, unhappy, unhealthy and ANGRY people I know. All they do is bicker, my dad constantly picks on my mom, they both bitch to my sister and I about the other, my mom is annoyingly passive aggressive. I'm in my twenties now, but they're just the same as it was when I was younger--if not worse. I think they might be staying together because they know this, and suddenly being "alone" sounds worse, but Jesus H. Christ. If I *ever* hear them say they stayed together for us, I'll have to have someone restrain me from punching them.
Oct 25, 2010 Taffy commented on Savage Love.
Just to add:

Sleeping with the boyfriend = a bandaid on a gangrenous leg

Help from a good therapist = throwing maggots on the gangrene
Oct 25, 2010 Taffy commented on Savage Love.
"This next part is to 223, who says that she suggests that she needs the BF as a crutch to survive. I had two close friends come home from Viet Nam who had PTSD. Before they got the help that they desperated needed, both used booze and drugs as their "crutch" to survive. Thank god they did not have you around to advise them. "

And what I was saying is that the sooner she gets some REAL help, the better. People do what they need to do, but she'll be better off longterm with a good therapist than a mindless fuck. . . and the sooner she moves toward that, the better, for herself, for her husband and for her marriage.
Oct 25, 2010 Taffy commented on Savage Love.
"(she considers the rapist a loss? Seriously?)"

Well, she obviously trusted the guy that raped her, and enjoyed his company enough to fuck him before all that, so he was probably a friend with benefits, right? Your first thought as an outsider would be "WTF?! Good riddance!" but it makes sense in a twisted way that she'd feel a kind of loss despite the horrible thing he did to her. Having someone you thought was your friend betray you so wholey and brutally is very painful. It's not like the rapist was a stranger. The vast majority of rapists AREN'T strangers to their victims. It's part of what makes things so guilt-laden, complicated and hard to deal with.

Going through the comments after I wrote but before I posted this, I see NOP_Spinster @84 wrote it a lot more eloquently than I could.

"I'll repeat that, because it's important: despite popular opinion, YOU DO NOT OWE YOUR SPOUSE SEX."

If she loves him like she says she does, she owes it to him to try to get herself healthy, and finding an understanding therapist would be a good start. You owe it to the person you love to take care of yourself. If you can't do that, maybe you shouldn't be in a relationship. Fucking the boyfriend is something of a crutch that might be holding her together for the short term--SOMETHING that can help keep her from losing her shit for a while--but it won't help long-term.
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Oct 24, 2010 Taffy commented on Savage Love.
"reconciling yourself to the fact that most submissive straight men in D/s relationships met vanilla women who weren't perverts themselves but were pervertible."

I agree with this part big time. I'm a woman in my twenties, and while I am more likely to want to be dominated (Though that "socialized to want it" part kind of pisses me off, *ahem*), I do have a streak of wanting to be the dominant partner, and finding a lot of pleasure in it, even if I do feel kind of awkward at times. Uncharted territory and all that. I can see how, with the right partner, I could REALLY get into it and have a great time. I suggest you set your sights on a girl that could go for it, and help her become the domme you both want her to be. Help someone flower into the pervert they were born to be! ;-)
Oct 14, 2010 Taffy commented on Savage Love.
Sorry for the double post. D'oh.
Oct 14, 2010 Taffy commented on Savage Love.
I'm with 15. Has she brought up playing with a strap on? He might like that. My boyfriend isn't exclusively into transgirls, but he does like them, I think in part because it's a "safe" way to play with cock. . . and I swear, all guys, gay or straight, are obsessed with cock. Plus, he likes having his ass played with, which I think is a somewhat separate thing--how many transgirls have reliably working cocks?--but you might as well bring it up and see if he'd be into it, as an extra fun thing for you guys to do if nothing else.

"that's a genre that appeals exclusively to straight/straightish/bi male viewers."

I like a sexy transgirl or transguy (Hello, Buck Angel. Yummm. . . Usually not attracted to super muscle-bound guys, either, but. . . um. . . Buck is HOT. Heh.) and I'm female.

Also, thank you Dan for knocking holes into that woman's letter. You basically said what I could never quite articulate.

@16: "I have respect for anyone whose faith leads them to do the humane thing."

Me, too.

@25: "There's nothing in the mail to indicate the lady in question was the girlfriend he cheated on. I think we've all been in relationships that were just not terribly serious and hence not exclusive. Marriage isn't like that."

I didn't take it as her being the one that was cheated on either, but how soundly would you sleep knowing your boyfriend/girlfriend cheated on their previous partner? What makes you so special that he/she wouldn't cheat on YOU, you know?

"people kill themselves all the time, for all sorts of reasons. "

Yeah, but these are KIDS that are feeling suicidally hopeless and being BULLIED to DEATH.
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Oct 14, 2010 Taffy commented on Savage Love.
I'm with 15. Has she brought up playing with a strap on? He might like that. My boyfriend isn't exclusively into transgirls, but he does like them, I think in part because it's a "safe" way to play with cock. . . and I swear, all guys, gay or straight, are obsessed with cock. Plus, he likes having his ass played with, which I think is a somewhat separate thing--how many transgirls have reliably working cocks?--but you might as well bring it up and see if he'd be into it, as an extra fun thing for you guys to do if nothing else.

"that's a genre that appeals exclusively to straight/straightish/bi male viewers."

I like a sexy transgirl or transguy (Hello, Buck Angel. Yummm. . . Usually not attracted to super muscle-bound guys, either, but. . . um. . . Buck is HOT. Heh.) and I'm female.

Also, thank you Dan for knocking holes into that woman's letter. You basically said what I could never quite articulate.

@16: "I have respect for anyone whose faith leads them to do the humane thing."

Me, too.

@25: "There's nothing in the mail to indicate the lady in question was the girlfriend he cheated on. I think we've all been in relationships that were just not terribly serious and hence not exclusive. Marriage isn't like that."

I didn't take it as her being the one that was cheated on either, but how soundly would you sleep knowing your boyfriend/girlfriend cheated on their previous partner? What makes you so special that he/she wouldn't cheat on YOU, you know?

"people kill themselves all the time, for all sorts of reasons. "

Yeah, but these are KIDS that are feeling suicidally hopeless and being BULLIED to DEATH.
More...
 

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