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Nov 23, 2011 Humorless commented on Savage Love.
Straight people sympathetic to LGBTQ issues are just advocates for social equality. I fail to see what civil rights has to do with my sexuality.

Because isn't that the essence of the fight, that it is not about sexuality at all, it is about all citizens having equal rights under law, no exceptions. It used to be about skin color, now it's about gender/sexual identity, and it's just the same amount of wrong.

Just as you wouldn't say that my desire for equality meant I should identify as cis-caucasian, don't label me cis-het.
Sep 3, 2011 Humorless commented on The Economist Condemns Seattle For Failing to Wage War On Cars.
When I told people I'd acquired a bike, everyone had a cyclist horror story to share. A broken collarbone in this intersection, a shattered knee on this street, a concussion at that intersection, a broken wrist on that street. I ignored the warnings and in one week I had three car doors opened in my path, a narrowly avoided collision due to a run red light, and a bus edging me off the road. Boston may be a "walking city" but it is hell on cyclists. I bought a bus pass and gave away the bike.
Aug 26, 2011 Humorless commented on Pit Polling.
My sister called Animal Control for a rattlesnake in her yard yesterday. I was like "Bitch, you wouldn't have called the cops for a garter snake, you're so racist. You know garters and rattlers have almost the exact same DNA, the rattler just wasn't loved enough by a caring pet owner. How could you do that to such a sweet snake that really loves kids?"
Aug 24, 2011 Humorless commented on Graven Image Destroyed By An Angry God To Be Rebuilt By Defiant Sinners.
You left out that there's a porn superstore almost right across the street from Big Butter Jesus.
Aug 14, 2011 Humorless commented on Such Nice Dogs.
@60: I have talked to my neighbor, and the only time she'll let the dog inside is when her husband is home, and he works two jobs.

@62: My beagle would likely disagree with your theory that I'm irrationally afraid of dogs, especially as she refuses to go out in the backyard, too.

Honestly, the only thing keeping me from calling city officials (pitbulls are banned in my city) is fear that the dog will be destroyed. I hate him, and I think he shouldn't breed more like him, I don't think he should have ever been born himself, and I think his owners should be fined heavily for owning an illegal animal, but I don't want to be the instrument of his demise.
Aug 13, 2011 Humorless commented on Such Nice Dogs.
My neighbor has a pit bull that towers over the fence we share. He snarls, barks, and shakes the fence if I dare go in my backyard. So I haven't planted my garden this year, I don't use the grill, and my landscaping job is half-finished. Because I know that snarling monster will learn that he can leap the fence, and I'd like to keep my face.
Jul 21, 2011 Humorless commented on To Tell the Truth.
88: You can be as insecure as you want it to be, but you cannot punish other people for your own flaws. Our sex lives begin well before we ever have sexual partners, and thinking that your partner's fantasies or desires are a reflection on you or your relationship is incredibly narcissistic.

As for the implication that I need to adjust the way I think about women, I'm fairly confident that I treat myself as a human being and not as a bag of "inexplicable and annoying emotions." How nice of you to assume that someone who disagrees with you must be a man.
Jul 21, 2011 Humorless commented on To Tell the Truth.
40: Your arguments are even more horrifying. You're essentially saying that the only kind of porn your partner can consume are ones where the subjects look exactly like you and do the exact things in bed that you do. Thinking that you're "competing" with the porn is no different from thinking that porn is cheating.
Jun 19, 2011 Humorless commented on Vancouver, BC, Goddam.
@32: There is some cause to be smug about feeling safe after sporting events in Boston. The police clear all cars in a 10-block radius. They have cops in riot gear stationed around the perimeter before the game starts. They have helicopters patrolling the area all night long (which is fun when you live near Fenway, falling asleep to the whir of the chopper blades). Celebrations get rowdy, but people don't get hurt.

It's a bit disgraceful that Vancouver was smug enough to think they didn't have to take proper precautions.
Jun 17, 2011 Humorless commented on The God That Failed.
Those kids look so tortured, it makes me want to spend my Sundays outside of churches with large signs reassuring the kids that they're totally normal.

And what the hell, preacher? Straight kids get molested, too.