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May 16, 2011 Miara commented on SL Letter of the Day: Anti-Social Lubrication.

@40, you're right; this could be caused by some underlying medical issue.

Also, be an advocate for yourself, both with the (way too many) uniformed doctors and with your sexual partners. One of the things I had to learn to do was take control and tell my boyfriend what he was going to do, so that we could have sex, which, it turns out, can be a fun addition to your sexual repertoire.

May 16, 2011 Miara commented on SL Letter of the Day: Anti-Social Lubrication.

Dammit, I wrote this big long thing about my experience with vaginismus, but the computer got fucked up and my comment is gone. But, the basic gist was KEGELS; do them early, do them often, and pay attention to how it feels to relax your pelvic muscles.

Also, don't be too quick to embrace the term vaginismus (though it's looking like the beginnings of it). The last thing you want is to have this thought in your head that your pussy is broken. Look at this as a speed bump in an otherwise awesome sexual experience. Follow Dan's advice, especially the last paragraph, and do your kegels. Then, you probably won't have to go to the Gyno and ask them about dilators and biofeedback and all that jazz.

-Oh yeah, and pay attention to the type of lube you're using. You're vagina is more sensitive than the rest of your skin and it could be irritated by something as simple as dryer sheets. My advice, get a lube that doesn't have glycerin in it. And, ABOVE EVERYTHING ELSE, have FUN.

Dec 21, 2010 Miara commented on Meanwhile In San Francisco.

Wait, is Dan doing any public appearances in the Bay Area?

Dec 14, 2010 Miara commented on SL Letter of the Day: Sitting On a Secret.

I grew up with a gay family member. No one ever outed her to me or anything. I just found out that her girlfriend was coming to thanksgiving. The normalcy with which my parents presented the situation shaped my views towards homosexuality. If they had taken me aside and warned me that some ladies like ladies and my aunt is one of them, I may read into the situation, and created my views of homosexuality completely differently.

With kids, I don't think there should be any coming out, because you're telling them that homosexuality is a thing that is supposed to be kept secret, that it makes people uncomfortable. I think ALGIN is doing her sister a disservice. Think of the adult (with political views and the right to vote) she will become.

Nov 23, 2010 Miara commented on Former High-Ranking Catholic Theologian: Church Overrun With Homosexual Homophobes.

There's a really hot movie somewhere in there. Think about it: secrets, intrigue, amazing sets, hot priest sex? I'd buy a ticket.

Nov 20, 2010 Miara commented on Savage Love.

@13 and 16 Dudes, just check the blog and scroll down to last Wednesday. It was a funny letter...

Nov 18, 2010 Miara commented on SL Letter of the Day: Nuts and Chews.

I'm a lady and prefer nutless brownies. Are we inherently bottoms? I dunno, but all I know is that sweets should be left alone to be sweets, and health nuts and potheads should stop trying to fuck with them.

Nov 18, 2010 Miara commented on Freedom Isn't Free.

I haven't read any of the comments (so pardon me if I'm redundant) but I am one Californian who doesn't want it both ways. I know that there are way too many underfunded programs that are essential and I am completely willing to pay more taxes to fund them. But, no one has asked me, so I guess I don't count.