Jan 11, 2012
commented on SL Letter of the Day: Over To You, Gang
B-CAS-S should have a talk with her husband. Maybe he wants more sex that they're getting. Maybe the potential CPOS doesn't fulfill her husband's fetishes and turn-ons: either because she's never asked (they don't seem great at communication) or because she's just not GGG. Does she initiate? Has he been to the doctor to diagnose potential medical issues interfering with his libido.
Lots of men are less threatened by a woman sleeping with another woman. Ignoring the gender politics of that position, there's probably a good chance that while BCASS's husband would not allow them to open their relationship to a man, he would allow her to have a female piece on the side. It's also entirely possible that the thought of his wife with another woman might be the spark he needs to get that motor in gear so the pair of them can have sex more than twice a month.
Regardless of the sex of the partner, if BCASS sleeps with a woman without bothering to talk to her husband, I think she earns the CPOS label. Additionally, not being able to talk about a basic need such as sex indicates that their marriage is not long for this world, so she'll be reduced to a divorced POS.
Feb 14, 2011
commented on Hello, I'm Not the Enemy
Jesus H. Christ. Have any of these FA people actually read your column?! 'Kid gloves' don't apply, but you treat everyone with respect and I have never read you treat any group differently because they were a member of such-and-such a group. You're as nice and helpful to the babysitting pedophile as you are to the jack-ass with the clay fetish. However, both what makes your column great and what makes every angry fat acceptance person with a laptop write angry tumblr messages about you is simply this: You are an avid proponent of PERSONAL ACCOUNTABILITY.
Pedophile needs to make sure he doesn't touch kids. Creepy clay guy needs to accept that locking his wife out of the bathroom was a dick move. Asexual person needs to tell sexual people that he's 'grey-A'. And fat people, either people who aren't happy being fat or whose partners aren't happy with their being fat, need to lose weight.
Fat acceptance people, or even worse, "Fat is an incurable disease" people, deny personal accountability. They refuse to accept it. Any of it. And since Dan is such a strong proponent of taking responsibility for your own shit, he is butting heads with them.
Jan 26, 2011
commented on Savage Love
THIN, one more thing. You sounds like you both loathe and love fat girls. The fact that coming out as a fat-lover was more difficult than coming out as gay indicates that you honestly believe there is something VERY wrong with liking bigger women.
It's like being racist but having a fetish for Black women. At some point, there going to sense your inner conflict and it's going to make them feel like shit.
You should work on yourself, and on seeing fat women as normal women. If you're ashamed to be dating them, then their self-esteems going to take a major hit, whether you're complimenting their fat asses or not.
Nov 18, 2010
commented on SL Letter of the Day: Milking It
Of course, the problem of unmatching sex drives is one that may never be resolved. He's never gonna want it less, and unless MEH's sex drive is lowered for some reason right now, well... MEH's partner is going to be eating a lot of reheated spaghetti.
Having been the partner who doesn't like spaghetti in several relationships, I can say that it's so much better being with someone who likes eating home-made meals as often as you do. No pressure or guilt for the less interested partner, none of that annoying insecurity from the partner who doesn't feel wanted.
Oct 6, 2010
commented on It Gets Better: Tim Gunn Made It Work...
Yahoo front page, Dan! If the teenagers weren't listening before, I bet they are now. "It Gets Better" has had so much publicity...let's just hope the message is getting through.