It's not very popular.

Nov 29 Kathy23 commented on SL Letter of the Day: The Care Package.
Dan-Great catch on the narcissism, but I gotta say I think you missed on the gift basket thumbs up(I think it was a completely understandable gay man bias.)



As a lady with lady parts I say "Elaborate gift basket as a response to an unplanned pregnancy and abortion?! Ugh. A WORLD of "no"."
Nov 12 Kathy23 commented on SL Letter of the Day: Dr. Lori Brotto Steps In.
Wow Dan! Thanks for bringing in this Lady Parts expert! I feel like I just got a graduate course in one letter!
Oct 20 Kathy23 commented on Sarah Treem, Cocreator of The Affair, Is Realistic About Her Own Marriage.
Umm... Hello Dan Savage? The guy who coined "monogamish"?! Why are you assuming that this data about people having sex outside of their marriage means they are *unfaithful*?! Could be an increase in consensual non-monagamy....

Gotta be careful about those assumptions! (Sex outside marriage does not necessarily equal cheating)...
Sep 23 Kathy23 commented on Raising Awareness of "Lopsided" Bisexuality During Bisexuality Visibility Week.
I think this is a great conversation - to really allow the range of sexuality to be acknowledged. Lopsided bisexuality certainly seems like it is out there- and many LB's just 'round down to straight' . As I read this though, I wish you or Blow might have commented more on the 'raped as a child' part.

It would be helpful if we could talk more about the enduring impact trauma can have on our sexuality-- our feelings and our choices-- in a long-term way. For some it can make something that would otherwise be erotic, frightening. For others it can make something associated with fear strongly erotic. It can make some people who were abused engage in repetitive re-enactment of those scenes, even if the gender of the person is not who they are typically attracted to. And the thing that seems to characterize these 'reenactment experiences' is that the person does not really enjoy them or find sexual freedom in them. Blow's own comments about having to get really drunk to have these encounters and then regretting them after certainly raises this question for me. And I think that it is helpful to separate 'orientation' from 'trauma reaction'. One is innate, the other is a reaction to a difficult event.
(By the way, in NO way am I suggesting that most bisexual people are reacting to trauma. ) If someone experiences sexual trauma and has a lot of sexually confusing impulses after that, there can be a connection.
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Sep 22 Kathy23 commented on SL Letter of the Day: Played Out.
Yes. Yes. Yes.
God, yes you are being played.
He seems to like cheating on people. Probably why the sex stays so hot year after year. There's a lot of power in keeping things secret. If you want to continue with him you have to just assume there are others getting laid by him without your knowledge. If you can't live with that then break up with him. But you could also think of it as his kink and let him exercise that.
But yes, protection.
Aug 28 Kathy23 commented on Man Tased, Arrested for Crime of Being Black in St. Paul, Minnesota.
Thanks for using your blog to post this. It's sickening and shocking. And it happens every day and I hear little about it . So thanks for broadcasting it.
Jul 10 Kathy23 commented on Claiborne Richardson and the Manassas City Police Department Suddenly Have Second Thoughts About Making Child Porn.
Dan- Thanks for alerting us to this. It's disgusting. Real child pornographers are out there NOT being caught and Virginia is wasting money prosecuting/damaging for life a teen engaging in consensual cyber-sex!
I feel like we need to go up the food chain.
Would you be willing to direct the monkeys to the governor's office? Publish that email!
May 20 Kathy23 commented on Federal Judge Strikes Down Pennsylvania's Ban on Same-Sex Marriage.
The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward irony!
Dec 4, 2013 Kathy23 commented on SLLLOTD: Tenure Track.
Oh Dan, as a former single girl-type professor in a small university town, I think your advice was wa-hay off. OF COURSE they are going to talk about their first dates with each other (unless they hate each other) because a)small towns are boring and b) dating is rare and hard to come by in those situations. My advice is he should mention it to both of them before they figure it out. He can bring it up in a casually "oh, that's funny, I think I recently met someone who works in that department" kinda way. This gives him a little spin control.
They will talk. I'd lay money on it
Jul 4, 2013 Kathy23 commented on SL Letter of the Day: Ewww, Gross!.
I just wanna say I'm not sure Dan is right about man-on-man sex seeming unmasculine to most straight women. I think the other explanation is most of it-- it seems GAY to them. Most of the straight boys we know are not only NOT interested man-on-man, but they are vehemently averse to it (part homophobia, part wiring if the science I've read is right). So when we meet a young20's guy who 'just for fun' wants to float the idea of fucking another guy, we think, "Dude, you must be gay!" because of all the stigmas he has to push through to get to this. So yes, this is bi-phobic (or maybe bi-unaware, just maybe... generally accurate). So I think most women take a step back because it seems like an orientation thing rather than a masculinity thing. And I think most women are much more threatened by the idea of their guy wanting to fuck guys than wanting to fuck other girls.

Now, if the girls already know you are Bi when they start dating you and they still say Eww, gross, that's on them. And maybe you need to explain what "Bi" means because maybe it has a different definition in Tucson than everywhere else!
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