Jun 27, 2011
commented on Bisexuals
I feel like I "get" where Dan is coming from. He's addressing people like me, who were more openly bi or gay earlier in our lives, but don't readily identify as bi now that we "pass" as hetero marrieds. I encounter a lot of homophobia from straight people, and I never know quite how to handle it. Sometimes I "come out" to them, and that either makes them change their rhetoric, peg me as an outsider, or reject me, but it a big relief. And sometimes, I listen to their rhetoric and decide it's just too hostile.
The key to a lot of this, to me, is the setting. When I'm in openly gay or gay friendly environments, I don't hesitate to identify as "bi." But I encounter gay friendly settings less and less as I age.
Clearly, it's not a good set-up to be in the closet. It's painful and uncomfortable whether you're gay or bi or whatever. And maybe there would be a positive effect if straight people (or never considereds) had any idea how varied the sexuality of those around them really was. God bless those trail blazers! To be honest, I don't think I will be one of them.