May 31
delta35 commented on Savage Love.
@106 -- PDAs / public D/S gave some SLOGgers the vapors! Love it.
@108 -- totally.
@107 -- on PDAs -- you're right, not all venues are equal. But if you want total sexual propriety, go to Saudi Arabia, literally. Public spaces are shared -- you don't get to do everything you like, but at the same time, in most western countries, we don't have to comport to the most prudish / easily traumatized.
If a couple is heavy petting on the subway and it's crowded and I'm 3" from them, I'm probably uncomfortable as it's involving me.
If they're heavy petting and the same subway is nearly empty and I can comfortably look away and we're separated by 15 feet -- no problem, who cares? Vicarious joy. Just last week there was a straight couple making out for about 30min. on the street near the Eagle in NYC (gay leather bar). Walked around them to get in. Very surprised 30 min. later (eagle not my scene) to see them still at it -- happy for their stamina! :-)
Public D/S thing is not necessarily the same as a PDA, but to me it's even less potentially offensive as it's a contextualized D/S "meaning" of a generally neutral non-sexual behavior.
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@108 -- totally.
@107 -- on PDAs -- you're right, not all venues are equal. But if you want total sexual propriety, go to Saudi Arabia, literally. Public spaces are shared -- you don't get to do everything you like, but at the same time, in most western countries, we don't have to comport to the most prudish / easily traumatized.
If a couple is heavy petting on the subway and it's crowded and I'm 3" from them, I'm probably uncomfortable as it's involving me.
If they're heavy petting and the same subway is nearly empty and I can comfortably look away and we're separated by 15 feet -- no problem, who cares? Vicarious joy. Just last week there was a straight couple making out for about 30min. on the street near the Eagle in NYC (gay leather bar). Walked around them to get in. Very surprised 30 min. later (eagle not my scene) to see them still at it -- happy for their stamina! :-)
Public D/S thing is not necessarily the same as a PDA, but to me it's even less potentially offensive as it's a contextualized D/S "meaning" of a generally neutral non-sexual behavior.
May 30
delta35 commented on Savage Love.
@100 you are sooo overthinking things. Do you think everyone in a relationship says "Oh, PDA x would indicate affection, but PDA y would be an overt sexual behavior intended to coerce others, and/or a public indication of our preferred sexual roles." Geez.
Good thing none of you live near Vondelpark! (Google it, sex-negative SLOGgers).
Good thing none of you live near Vondelpark! (Google it, sex-negative SLOGgers).
May 30
delta35 commented on Savage Love.
OMG! Who cares if the two guys are slightly getting off in public with the shoelace tying (which apparently they weren't)? Who cares even if they had boners (which they didn't)? Not like they're whipping it out or masturbating in public. Get over it, folks.
I think PDAs are cute, and shoelace tying is in the PDA category, not line-crossing non-consensual exhibitionism. When I was a teen and alone I didn't like to see PDAs (intensified the loneliness) but now that I've been happily partnered for a couple of decades I just think it's nice to see people in public enjoying themselves: gay, straight, lesbian, young, old, hot, not, whatever. If that includes holding hands, tying shoelaces, kissing, whatever, it all just makes me smile. Buddhists talk about vicarious joy -- life's short, it's just nice seeing people enjoying themselves. If you don't like it, go to Saudi Arabia. I hear they are very into the whole sexual propriety thing.
I think PDAs are cute, and shoelace tying is in the PDA category, not line-crossing non-consensual exhibitionism. When I was a teen and alone I didn't like to see PDAs (intensified the loneliness) but now that I've been happily partnered for a couple of decades I just think it's nice to see people in public enjoying themselves: gay, straight, lesbian, young, old, hot, not, whatever. If that includes holding hands, tying shoelaces, kissing, whatever, it all just makes me smile. Buddhists talk about vicarious joy -- life's short, it's just nice seeing people enjoying themselves. If you don't like it, go to Saudi Arabia. I hear they are very into the whole sexual propriety thing.
May 28
delta35 commented on American Savage Comes Out Today.
1. Congrats on the book!
2. Pleeaase post on SLOG next time you are scheduled to speak in NYC -- before tickets go on sale -- with where to get them. So that loyal SLOG readers can have a chance at getting tickets before they sell out.
3. So, so depressed to read in the dedication that Dan's own father still votes Republican. I've given up on the idea that the power of ideas alone can win over the old timers, but is there any hope for humanity if someone with a son as rational and successful as Dan FUCKIN' ROCKIN' Savage still ignores his very own son and keeps voting Republican circa 2013? Or keeps on watching Fox? (especially given Dan's non-wealthy family of origin and the obvious hoodwinking of the upper middle class, middle class and working class by Republicans for the benefit of the 0.1%)
2. Pleeaase post on SLOG next time you are scheduled to speak in NYC -- before tickets go on sale -- with where to get them. So that loyal SLOG readers can have a chance at getting tickets before they sell out.
3. So, so depressed to read in the dedication that Dan's own father still votes Republican. I've given up on the idea that the power of ideas alone can win over the old timers, but is there any hope for humanity if someone with a son as rational and successful as Dan FUCKIN' ROCKIN' Savage still ignores his very own son and keeps voting Republican circa 2013? Or keeps on watching Fox? (especially given Dan's non-wealthy family of origin and the obvious hoodwinking of the upper middle class, middle class and working class by Republicans for the benefit of the 0.1%)
May 26
delta35 commented on SL Letter of the Day: Pray Away.
@3 nah, because a horny straight Christian nut job would be able to look forward at some point to marriage and sky-man-sanctioned baby making...
He could be a dog fucker or child rapist, but he phrased his conflict as being specific to his faith -- that kinda narrows it down to adult consensual cock sucking. Dan nailed it in '09 and sadly, there are still tortured souls like this in '13.
He could be a dog fucker or child rapist, but he phrased his conflict as being specific to his faith -- that kinda narrows it down to adult consensual cock sucking. Dan nailed it in '09 and sadly, there are still tortured souls like this in '13.
May 26
delta35 commented on SL Letter of the Day: Pray Away.
@Dan " No hell below us, above us only sky, etc."
Actually there's also sky below us. :-)
My point being, the early versions of today's major world religions didn't even realize the earth's roughly spherical. Doubly goes to show how stoopid it is for LW -- or anyone else -- to base 21st century laws or personal ethics on the beliefs of bronze age sand-dwelling tribal nomads.*
*Islamo-Judeo-Christian fascists and the Troll -- I am of course referring to either the Jawas, or the Tusken Raiders, of Tatooine, and not your sky-man whom you allege made an entire universe of billions of galaxies with billions of stars in each -- and allegedly is utterly preoccupied with whether a couple of dudes are sucking each other's cocks or a woman is deciding not to get / stay preggers.
Actually there's also sky below us. :-)
My point being, the early versions of today's major world religions didn't even realize the earth's roughly spherical. Doubly goes to show how stoopid it is for LW -- or anyone else -- to base 21st century laws or personal ethics on the beliefs of bronze age sand-dwelling tribal nomads.*
*Islamo-Judeo-Christian fascists and the Troll -- I am of course referring to either the Jawas, or the Tusken Raiders, of Tatooine, and not your sky-man whom you allege made an entire universe of billions of galaxies with billions of stars in each -- and allegedly is utterly preoccupied with whether a couple of dudes are sucking each other's cocks or a woman is deciding not to get / stay preggers.
May 21
delta35 commented on There Are No Atheists In Foxholes.
Good for her.
Surprising how quiet the fundies are when the most anti-gay marriage state in the whole union gets whacked by their god. (the only state where the constitution *criminalizes* issuing a same-sex marriage license)
Surprising how quiet the fundies are when the most anti-gay marriage state in the whole union gets whacked by their god. (the only state where the constitution *criminalizes* issuing a same-sex marriage license)
May 21
delta35 commented on Rightwing Anti-Gay French Activist Commits Suicide at Notre Dame Cathedral.
Looks like SLOG ate my comment that came before @59. I said something like this:
"unfortunate" = :-). Dan, you would have rocked the court of Louis XVI with your bon mots.
If only Dan could come up with a non-cruel way (without being hurtful to those who lost loved ones) of pointing out the hypocrisy of the Christian fundies and the Oklahoma tornado tragedy -- those same fundies who are the first to blame sodomy & gay marriage and "God's punishment" when disaster strikes NY or CA, are strangely silent after the OK tornado. For those who don't know, Oklahoma is the only state in the USA to make it, by state constitution, a criminal offense to issue a same-sex marriage license, so they are by this measure the most anti-gay state in the country. Plus those fundies get a pass in the mainstream media with their homophobic BS. Sooo fed up with Christian/Catholic/Judeo/Islamic fundies.
"unfortunate" = :-). Dan, you would have rocked the court of Louis XVI with your bon mots.
If only Dan could come up with a non-cruel way (without being hurtful to those who lost loved ones) of pointing out the hypocrisy of the Christian fundies and the Oklahoma tornado tragedy -- those same fundies who are the first to blame sodomy & gay marriage and "God's punishment" when disaster strikes NY or CA, are strangely silent after the OK tornado. For those who don't know, Oklahoma is the only state in the USA to make it, by state constitution, a criminal offense to issue a same-sex marriage license, so they are by this measure the most anti-gay state in the country. Plus those fundies get a pass in the mainstream media with their homophobic BS. Sooo fed up with Christian/Catholic/Judeo/Islamic fundies.
May 21
delta35 commented on Rightwing Anti-Gay French Activist Commits Suicide at Notre Dame Cathedral.
@my comment just posted on fundies -- meant to say if only he had killed himself solo rather in front of others so the others wouldn't have been traumatized; it's especially these violent hateful fundies (of all faiths) who stoke the climate that leads to LGBT bashings & murders even in so-called "gay-friendly" places like NYC -- time for some Savage posts on the NYC situation, multiple beatings and a murder in the past few weeks in the heart of the richest neighborhoods in one of the most pro-gay cities in USA
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@63 and the guy hitting on you in your gym. For me, I think he way crossed the line. While I'm very tolerant of couples doing whatever they like in public, I think your example of the guy hitting on you is a type of targeted interpersonal aggression. I'm OK with a couple snogging in public, not OK with a single guy masturbating in public or hitting on others aggressively -- in that case, he's doing stuff without consent to others. Yuck.
I'm flattered if an ugly dude smiles at me. Some staring at males is OK. If I were female-bodied, due to the higher rates of violence against women, I even object to that -- no public staring at women in gyms / subways / streets / etc.
But even as a male-bodied person who doesn't have to fear being raped (although I do have to fear being gay-bashed to death), being physically approached when I'm clearly not interested way crosses the line, and although pickups happen in gyms, a gym is not typically an environment where one is expecting to be hit on, so I think overt attempts at picking up someone in the locker room are inappropriate unless you've been chatting first and clearly there is mutual interest. Approaching physically when there's been no reciprocation of interest is creepy. Even in a gay sex club so crowded you're packed like commuters in rush hour, you wait for an indication of mutual interest -- so I'm told :-).
But to the SLOGgers who got the vapors about a couple engaging in public shoe lace tying... as George Takei says, ohh myyy.