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Jun 23, 2014 SifuMark commented on Falling Out of Love With New Pope.
There is no such thing as "ODing" on pot, but I suspect that most sloggers know that.
More magic brownie than you meant to get means a talk with entities who are (arguably) not present, or a short period of severe paranoia (which guides some damn fools to the emergency room), or just going to sleep with your shoes on because you forgot how to untie them.
I have experienced the first two (but in the latter case I went to my bed, with my shoes off, not to the fucking emergency room because I am not an idiot).
Jun 15, 2014 SifuMark commented on SL Letter of the Day: Just Out.
Craigs'sList is a wonderful recourse, you get partners, some of which wind up just friends (you know what that sometimes means: an important person who you love and is fun to be with), sometimes you get a wife (or a husband, those are out there too.).
I love to brag that I found her on CL. So there.
Jun 13, 2014 SifuMark commented on Mormon Church Stops Pretending It Gives Two Shits.
Recently missionaries showed up on my porch, I explained that I was already familiar with their beliefs, and whipped Discordian Pope cards out of my wallet, they had no idea what to do so they took them.
We Discordians worship the Great God of Chaos (Eris, who is a female God BTW), so it was basically a ticket to hell by their belief structure: they now have proof that they are Popes (as we all are) and I hope that it jump started their brains.
May 30, 2014 SifuMark commented on Headline of the Day.
Side note:
As a retail worker I have noticed that some young men still consider the purchase of condoms as an occasion for shame, not pride, and I don't think that in two years at a drug store I've sold to more than one woman.

Get it together folks, hold them over your head on the way to the counter (or just open carry) so people know "This is how it's done!"

/preaching to the choir
May 30, 2014 SifuMark commented on Headline of the Day.
My mind in fifth grade "You have a tree house hiding a box full of porn mags and you want to ride bikes? What's wrong with you?"
May 3, 2014 SifuMark commented on Coming Soon: Wind the Inheritance.
I was recovering from an anxiety attack and then I found out that H.D.A. was taking a bath in a sewer.

I need to hide, he was my hero.
May 3, 2014 SifuMark commented on At the Top of My Twitter Feed This Morning.
As Luis C.K. pointed out, if you have a ten year old boy he will fuck the couch if left alone.

If your male kids are grown, suit yourself, if they're not this thing is going to get messed up.
Apr 2, 2014 SifuMark commented on Man Who Raped Three-Year-Old Daughter Sentenced to Probation.
Was the judge a Catholic bishop?
Because he thinks like a Catholic bishop.
Mar 20, 2014 SifuMark commented on People Are Upset About Bill Maher's Comments About Noah (and Copernicus).
Plushsnail: I don't know what you mean by this "Religious thought" of which you speak.

Fortunate: good work unpacking that. I don't know what the word "spiritual" means and haven't seen any use for it since I figured that out several years ago. Humans need to cut loose and get high, so we tell stories around campfires, play music and go to movies, the day these stories came to be mistaken for truth they become lies.

Signed Sincerely:Rev. Dktr Saint Cephalopod
Mar 12, 2014 SifuMark commented on Savage Love.
Some guy out there who wants to be wants to be a dominatrix has an opportunity.

It happens one way, why can't it happen the other?