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I'm married, poly, and kink-friendly My passion is for helping people have healthier, happier, and… more »

TheGoddessMaria is wondering if anyone really reads other users' profiles.
Oct 28, 2010 TheGoddessMaria commented on Savage Love.
Lymis, I am with you. #11 has a "Focus On the Family" feel to it! (without the gratuitous homo-hating) This woman would benefit from a healthy sense of humor about the whole thing - "even turning dyke on the guy didn't keep him from being at Thanksgiving, so I decided to keep him around to help out my dad" or something along those lines. If the husband had been abusive, that would be different. Life is too short to be "enraged" over who is friends with whom. And being "comfortable" is overrated.

As far as being squirted in the face and "playing" with semen? It smells and tastes like bleach, so a bit of squeamishness is not unusual. That sort of play often benefits from the woman having had many orgasms first.... just sayin'. I teach this all the time to folks - it's amazing what people will do after several mind-boggling orgasms. Negotiate terms outside of the bedroom beforehand - that helps a lot of folks.
Apr 29, 2010 TheGoddessMaria commented on SL Letter of the Day: You Gonna Eat That?.
He definitely told you to attract or repel you - I doubt that it was a casual remark for him, even if he did frame it that way. He may be gauging your response for the future. Lots of guys won't even kiss a person who has just perfored fellatio to completion. Some guys really do get aroused by it, and some even like to perform cunnilingus on a woman they've just ejaculated inside. To each their own, but any man with me needs to 1) not masturbate in a place where their best clean-up option is to lick it up (ewww!! of of what?!? The keyboard? the desk? steering wheel? the floor??) and 2) wash that mouth out before they kiss me if they're just into eating their own cum.

I think that "ejaculate" is the correct word. "Cum" looks childish to me. "Come" is just what one has done after "coming" so shouldn't it be "went"??
Apr 7, 2010 TheGoddessMaria commented on Meanwhile in Egypt.
I can't imagine how anyone gets out of line in Egypt without being killed by the police. I saw more police per square foot in Cairo and Alexandria than I've seen anywhere outside a presidential motorcade. The police are on ever corner, with guns - BIG guns, and they aren't smiling, either. Egypt was beautiful but a bit intimidating.
Mar 29, 2010 TheGoddessMaria commented on Savage Love.
@100 That's hot!!! (Lenny Bruce, a hero)
I think that hearty laughter and a "So what?" would probably suffice. I mean, audiences all over this great country laugh every time the young man in American Pie boffs said pie, so at least you had an animate object of interest. Spend very little time or effort "defending" yourself or your teen fantasies - that's the amount of time it deserves. I don't think that fantasies are necessarily fucked up unless it's a precursor to fucked up actions.
Mar 23, 2010 TheGoddessMaria commented on SL Letter of the Day: Where Are All The Peggers?.
Pegging a guy is wicked fun! Strapping it on is fun - and fun that comes with a responsibility to be sensitive and gentle, unless told to ramp it up! I have suggestions to find peggers, but mostly I'm here to encourage ladies to get a harness and a range of tools to use with it, and try it out! By the way, Dan, if you're reading, I love telling folks about your column and spreading the use of the word pegging at work (I sell toys for Athena's Home Novelties at home parties). I also talk about "santorum" and how to prevent it and clean up afterwards.

Dudeguys who are looking for pegging might want to keep Tristan Taormino's books/DVDs onhand. She has the goods for anyone into anal at Consider looking for a mate that reads Savage Love and NOT Dear Prude (even though I love most of her advice, her sexual prudity is not amusing to me.)

Mar 21, 2010 TheGoddessMaria commented on SL Letter of the Day: Are Gay Men Unbearable?.
Hi, I'm Maria, and I'm queer.

Oh, sweetie, I didn't date anyone from high school either, because they were ALL a bunch of idiots! I dated a nice guy who was 18 and had already graduated from high school. Nobody knows how to act in high school, and I'm sure I was one of them, to my fellow students. (somehow I kept that guy, and we've been married for about 18 years now)

Gently remind people that you are romantically and physically interested in men when they assume you're gay, and perhaps a friend (gay or straight) will know someone they can introduce you to. But focus on developing your own personality until you meet someone to your liking. Rather than saying you're into "straight-acting" guys, you can say you like guys who like horseback riding and going to football games or whatever activity you like. See the men as people and potential friends first, not just as genitals with a pretty face, and hopefully you will be treated that way as well. Good luck! And contact PFlag if you need somewhere or someone to volunteer for. You'll meet folks who have already had your issue, and you'll be able to discuss it in a safe place.

As for "straight-acting" I refer to a line in a great song I heard on a college radio station one year - "how straight does he look when he's down on his knees?" The only actions that really define one as straight or gay are two things : sexual activities and self-labeling.

Mar 21, 2010 TheGoddessMaria commented on After Watching Nine Minutes Of This....
At least Loveschild had something to say that didn't involve judging people! (#13). Regular commenters just might want to mark this day in their journals!

I'm so glad that Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert get so much free material from buffoons like the ones in this video. I wish Bill Hicks and Sam Kinnison could have seen this era.
Mar 16, 2010 TheGoddessMaria commented on Need More Reasons to Not Do Meth?.
@15 Seandr, your comment (which I agree with wholeheartedly) is why I'm going to finally seek out cosmetic dentistry/orthodontistry. I've learned to live with the gaps in my teeth, but overhearing someone else pointing out a "methmouth" in a crowd finally forced the issue for me. I have seen what meth does to teeth, and mine are not rotted at all! If you really love your teeth and your life, stay the heck away from meth!
Mar 16, 2010 TheGoddessMaria commented on SL Letter of the Day: A Successful Threesome.
GGG says she's happy about her experiment, and I'm inclined to take her at her word. She sounds like a rational adult who thought about it and expressed her feelings clearly beforehand. Look, I know not everyone is happy with "sportfucking", but it HAPPENS and it's better, in my opinion, when it happens with a healthy dose of reality and 100% transparency. As an adult in a working openly non-monogamous marriage (17 years, thank you for asking), this kind of letter isn't what I'm about, but I do like the learning process that GGG went through. Thanks for sharing, GGG!
Mar 16, 2010 TheGoddessMaria commented on CNN on Tiger Woods Returning to Golf: "We are all over this story.".
So let me get this STRAIGHT... gay marriage will destroy the SANCTITY of marriage ?!?!?!