Apr 1, 2013
commented on SL Letter of the Day: My Best Guess
A new business, multiple young children and a sex life that I, at least, see as utterly exhausting and far too much work. Ease off the business, ease off the social/sex life, focus on your kids and each other. Get some counseling. DIAL IT THE FUCK DOWN. Take a week off if you can - spend the first half of the week reconnecting with each other and then the second half of it spending some quality time with your children who are probably feeling pretty damn adrift and insecure right now.
I know when I am under deadline at work, my stress can lead to unpredictability. Sometimes want to have sex like a damn bonobo and sometimes I just want to find a quiet place to lie down and turn off my brain. The description of the lifestyle in this letter practically made my severely ADD brain explode. It struck me as two people losing interest in each other because of too many distractions and stressors.
Mar 27, 2013
commented on Savage Love
SIS's intentions are good, but I kind of wonder about the wisdom of hooking up a guy with fairly severe mental health issues with a sex worker. As someone with mild OCD, I know that addressing the "immediate" concern or obstacle often just ends up opening up a whole bunch of other concerns. I feel like this is where a sex-positive therapist would be HUGELY helpful to guide the process or something (but how likely is it they'll be able to find one of those?). This guy's problems are clearly NOT because of his virginity, so I'm thinking the aftermath could be kind of messy.
Mar 26, 2013
commented on Lying Liar Lies
In any case, the popular vote shouldn't matter. It's a civil right and civil rights actually should not be put to a popular vote. They are fundamental. This really is a decision for those dang "activist" judges. But it's going to happen either way.
I wonder when Rush is going to collapse and die under the weight of his bile and moral corruption...
Mar 22, 2013
commented on SL Letter of the Day: Gay Husband Single On Grindr
Basically, CAB's husband has embraced dishonesty as a lifestyle choice. I wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him. This guy is all about himself, not about his primary partner (his husband!) or the men he hooks up with (who deserve to know that he is in a committed relationship). CAB, be very careful as you move forward with this guy. I have a feeling that he's going to tell you exactly what you want to hear, and then do exactly as he pleases.
Mar 18, 2013
commented on SL Letter of the Day: The Gateway Toy
Um, I dunno. I realize one has to work at marriage, but she sounds just awful. One routine? No reciprocity?
I suspect if the LW looked at his marriage as a whole, he would see other examples of rigidity and selfishness.
Mar 15, 2013
commented on SL Letter of the Day: Barely Legal
I dunno, this letter just freaks me out. I think of what I was like at 16 and can't imagine being with a 21-year-old. My younger cousin was dating a guy who was 19 when she was 16, and my whole family was freaking out. If her boyfriend had been 21, the cops would probably have been fishing pieces of him out of the river.
The LW could be a perfectly nice person, but... this all reeks to me of a controlling person grooming a 16-year-old kid to the point that the older person becomes that kid's whole world. And just when the younger person in the relationship is on the verge of achieving the kind of independence that would allow her to become a fully functional adult, whaddya know? The older person suddenly loses interest.
I don't think some modest financial support would have been out of line at all, but the LW should otherwise have had the grace to completely exit her partner's life.