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Gou Tongzhi
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  • Vampire or Zombie
  • God is: Noticeably absent, sadly.
  • SF or LA
  • What song or movie makes you cry?: Time, Tom Waits
  • What keeps you up at night?: Too much napping in the afternoon

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Mar 3 Gou Tongzhi commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Ball Gagging.
No one ever listens when I brag on here, and now I know why. It's because I don't have crazy kink stories like @1.
Feb 27 Gou Tongzhi commented on SL Letter of the Day: Hand-Sniffing Girlfriend.
I don't usually get 100% gung ho on the DTMFA wagon, but in this case, if all the details as given are true, this lady doesn't deserve to be in a relationship. Dump, flee, do not contact.
Feb 21 Gou Tongzhi commented on Savage Love.
I disagree strongly that the husband is merely flirting. In my experience texts like those accompany physical cheating.
Feb 21 Gou Tongzhi commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Come On, Snoopy.
I strongly disagree that the husband is doing harmless flirting.
Feb 13 Gou Tongzhi commented on Savage Love.
Tough column today. Based on what we are told, I'd say mom is overreacting but I totally understand her fear. Men are dangerous animals.

And hey, what an open family, huh? They sure talk freely.

Last night my girlfriend and I had a first of sorts that involved her trusting me quite a bit. I like to be aggressive in bed (but not sadistic) but I would never do anything that a partner wasn't 100% comfortable with -- any partner, let alone someone I adore and respect. I hope this kid grows up to be a guy who, if he is turned on by the thought of dominating others and using their bodies as a means to his own pleasure, also understands that trust and acceptance and consent are necessary and no detriment at all to the psychological thrill.
Jan 26 Gou Tongzhi commented on SL Letter of the Day: My Husband Just Came Out as Trans.
@6 - love it. The Truth.
Jan 20 Gou Tongzhi commented on SL Letter of the Day: Worst. Sex. Ever..
Letter Writer, you did nothing wrong (except maybe not leaving in disgust). Societal pressure is a strong thing. The guy was not a creep, he was not clueless. he was beyond those things: a vindictive, controlling, pouty, man-child asshole. Possibly sociopathic. Pat yourself on the back for having had the experience (so now you know), and move on. Not all men are like that.
Jan 10 Gou Tongzhi commented on SL Letter of the Day: Three Quickies.
" I sometimes wonder why people don't give that stuff a try—shitcan the expectations, stop trying to control each other, fuck whoever you want—before they get divorced."

Some do. But most don't. Because when most people are on the brink of divorce they don't want to work it out. They want to up the control and maybe even hurt the other person.
Jan 5 Gou Tongzhi commented on SL Letter of the Day: Harshing His Smell-o.
First, this guy is mentally ill and needs help, not a girlfriend. Help him from a distance and find a smart funny guy who bathes.

Second, I would just like to say that at the tender age of 43 I had anal (with my girlfriend) for the first time. It was pretty intense! I see why some people love it so.
Jan 2 Gou Tongzhi commented on Savage Love.
What a great column this week! One of the best yet. And so many intelligent, wise comments on how putting in sincere effort to keep the sex life going in a relationship. Too many great Slogger comments to cite, but I especially liked the idea that the default answer to "Sex?" in a relationship turns to "yes."

Second column in a week that is very apt to my current experience.


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