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Oct 17 vennominon commented on John Oliver Shreds Third Party Candidates Gary Johnson, Jill Stein, and Joe Exotic.
How many viable parties would we need to have a tolerable alternative on offer?
Oct 17 vennominon commented on Savage Love.
General question: Is it racist to use the phrase "the F-word" (which almost nobody does) because "the N-word" is still in vogue?
Oct 14 vennominon commented on Donald Trump Clarifies: He Only Sexually Assaults Hot Women.
Mr Yiannopoulos is largely the conservative version of Mr Savage. They both rose to fame on little more than encouraging straight people to use the F-word at us, and the criticism of MY from the left is remarkably similar in tone to the criticism of DS from the right twenty-ish years ago. The presidential debates would have been worth watching if the two of them had taken them over from the real candidates. And it's arguable that Mr Savage's trying to sell us out to the regressive left made a large contribution to our being landed with Mrs Clinton. Mr Yiannopoulous, who it seems would like to be the only open gay on the planet, is trying to sell out to the repressive right. I used to think that the two of them should have a debate moderated by Dave Rubin for an all-gay affair, but lately, having come to suspect Mr Rubin of trying to sell us out to the muddled middle, I'd rather see him as a third debater. Who would be left to moderate - Andrew Sullivan?

It is a shame we seem stuck in a one-party rut. People who insist that we must must MUST be Democrats forever may correctly be predicting that there won't be a viable alternative in our lifetimes, but they aren't really helping.

Oct 14 vennominon commented on Savage Love.
My thanks to LW3, and I am going to lodge a protest against the editorial board. That was highly pertinent information. Now, why was that edited out - did they think it redundant?

My thanks to Ms(?) Woof as well.
Oct 13 vennominon commented on Rush Limbaugh Takes a Stand Against Consensual Sex.
Mr Savage is inaccurate. I doubt Mr Limbaugh would care which of the two OS parties happened not to consent.
Oct 13 vennominon commented on Savage Love.
Ms Fan - No, I'm not grouchy towards LW3. I do think it makes a much better story if she has correctly decided that sex isn't for her, at least not in the foreseeable future, and enjoys a productive sex-free period of life that lasts however long it lasts. If she resumes and enjoys it, good for her, as long as she doesn't retroactively label the preceding period a failure. Who knows; she could be another Martina Navratilova. This line also has the advantage of not requiring further information on why things with the husband were so terrible.

There seem to be two factions forming in the comments. The Hinchcliff-Murgatroyd faction is perhaps the more interesting, because that might open up discussions along such lines as the nature of people who are content without sex and whether sexless SS relationships have taken a bit of a blow in the era of openness because of overreaching presumptions. In 1950, a quiet lesbian couple would have resembled H&M; now an H&M pair who happen not to be a couple resemble lesbians. If I were forced to guess on the limited information present, I'd guess that LW3 might have fit the Murgatroyd role had circumstance favoured such a path, but that it's less likely she could go successfully that way now.

What perhaps read as grouchy was my not wanting to ask leading questions of an Expert Witness. I didn't mention this earlier for that reason, but thought that the difference between "suspecting" and "betting" that LW would be good in bed (which seemed a logical interpretation of LW's "having a lot to offer") constituted tiptoeing over the YGG line. YGG can make me grouchy, though it's become so prevalent that I tend to ignore it when people just jump over the line. I didn't really think you were trying to back-door in an unstated conclusion that the terrible sex life was all or primarily Husband's fault, but there are others of whom I would not make the same guess.

But I do think it a little irresponsible of the faction who are urging LW3 simply to resume her sex life without any further inquiry into why things were so bad. There are a variety of possibilities, and, as the member of the assembled company at least as inexperienced as any other and a great deal more inexperienced than most with MF sexual relationships (it is tempting here to emulate Juliet Stevenson's Mrs Elton and say that, while I do not claim to be Dr Westheimer, my friends may hint that I am also the member of the assembled company least familiar with terrible sex in general, but I resist that temptation), I am willing to canvass the cosmic vibrations of those more expert than I. Husband could have been an abuser and LW stayed with him out of fear despite the terrible sex; Husband could have been inconsiderate but LW was raised just to close her eyes and think of Ireland; either of them could have made a good-faith attempt to have Good Sex only to be checkmated by the other's firm and insistent belief that Good Girls Don't; LW could have been of the entitled mind set that it was Husband's job to read her mind and give her pleasure; there are various other possibilities, and those more familiar with relations between husbands and wives will have more valuable cosmic vibrations than mine about this particular case. I do think that getting a read on why sex with Husband was so terrible is much more important if LW is to continue having OS sex (or even taking up SS sex, though we have no positive hint that she's at all inclined) than if she just opts for temporary or permanent retirement.

Now, I'm still somewhat grouchy about (All) women in their fifties or sixties deserving better than LW1, as I stand by the opinion that most people just are that awful, though I will allow that Ms Grizelda deserves better for having suffered enough from her siblings all her life, and Ms Cute deserves better for not treating Miss Austen as if she were Barbara Cartland. But, on the whole, my mood has improved after coming up with the earlier reference. It reminds me of The Murder at the Vicarage when Mrs Price Ridley is at the police station complaining about the anonymous telephone call, uncertain whether to call the language used obscene. The vicar asks her if she could understand the language used. That she could he posits as sufficient to decide that the call was not obscene, as a refined lady [I need a gesture to make whenever the L-word is mentioned in a non-Wimbledon context, something similar to crossing oneself] is naturally unacquainted with obscene language.
Oct 12 vennominon commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Sonny and Overshare.
...and this letter was selected and answered because...?
Oct 12 vennominon commented on Savage Love.
Ms Fan - More or less as I predicted. As your cosmic vibrations are more expert than mine on the third letter, what do they tell you was the cause of the terrible sex?
Oct 12 vennominon commented on Savage Love.
Ms Fan - Ah, we are in agreement about the second letter (would your opinion change if he preferred porn with women of small frontal endowments?). As for the third letter, why would you bet she has a lot to offer instead of just suspect it?

Chances are good that she was equally (or at the very least partially) responsible for her rotten sex life with her husband. And it makes a much better story if she has the self-knowledge and the good sense to know that she was never especially good at sex and further effort in that direction would just lead to diminishing returns. One could respect someone with that much sense of true self.

Oct 11 vennominon commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Stop Humping The Bed.
If romance were dead, I couldn't have retired from it.