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We've raised bus fares by around 50% since the recession hit.

For a place that hates private automobiles and their drivers, I find it surprisingly easy to get around by car when I want to.

But Seattle government has nothing to do with this discussion. Metro is not a City department, they're County. And the County's tax authority is restricted to it's current level by State law.
Posted by Lack Thereof]]> Wed, 22 May 2013 00:51:11 -0700 The Stranger
If she wanted to speak up but didn't, which doesn't even seem to be her point, then let that be a lesson to her. How can he have known?

And did she tell him to never grab her breasts and he did anyway? Doubtful.

So, while it is possible he knew she would not like it and did it anyway, I doubt it.

At my age, if it were clear a woman did not want to have sex, but I wanted to come, I might dry hump or stroke myself while we made out. And I might be hyper vigilant to make sure she was not upset or not comfortable with it. But to expect a 14 year old to do so would be absurd. It is the opposite of if he had taken her clothes off or had non consensual sex. he left her clothes on, did not stick it anywhere and she was willing to hump. And then he did it till he came. Where is the out of line there?

As for the guy with the wife, congrats on having a cool wife. I think there is very little doubt that she would be bothered by either if you presented them in a chill fun way. she might not be into it, but doubtful she would b e turned off in any big way. People with positive kink attitudes like she has generally are cool with such garden variety things.

Now, it is very unlikely. But if she is quite into being submissinve and feminine and really likes him to be masculine and assertive and all male, there is a chance this would be an attraction killer. But I think she would know that by now. And women that are kink friendly are very unlikely to be that way. Into dom sub, sure. But trying to hold a guy to a rigid sex role, unlikely. So, bring it up already. But make it positive and fun.
Posted by rp]]> Wed, 22 May 2013 00:46:25 -0700 The Stranger Posted by AdagioatMSN]]> Wed, 22 May 2013 00:33:17 -0700 The Stranger
Posted by lolorhone]]> Wed, 22 May 2013 00:29:31 -0700 The Stranger
The other hand is for my husband, same age spread but he was on the other side of it. Hubby is a sweet, quiet guy who I had to throw myself at multiple times before he realized that I might be interested in him. Definitely not the predatory type.

I think that statutory rape laws are absurd when there is less than a five year age gap. This young lady was within the law on the day before her 18th birthday, but a felon on the day after? Also, husband says he read somewhere that the relationship came to light because the girls were kicked off of the team for violating the "team members can't date" rule. Is that the case? If so, that rule is blatantly discriminatory. The quarter back can date the head cheer leader and that's fine, but if he dates the running back he gets kicked off the team. Most high school teams are all one sex, so this rule basically only outlaws same sex relationships.
Posted by Kitchenwitch]]> Wed, 22 May 2013 00:29:18 -0700 The Stranger Posted by Doot]]> Wed, 22 May 2013 00:06:55 -0700 The Stranger Posted by ttttttttttttwreck]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:55:22 -0700 The Stranger
And before you go off on me for being insensitive, I have depression and used to think ceaselessly about ending it. Many of my friends had similar struggles. I feel sad every time I hear of a young person killing themselves for these reasons. I'm not sure I feel anything about the suicides of terrorists (provided they take no one with them).
Posted by lqtm]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:49:05 -0700 The Stranger
The application: the "truth" of whatever happened is lost. What matters is what she remembers/perceived and what he remembers/perceived. If his memory does not align with hers, then contacting him is likely to be very unfulfilling, for all of the reasons other posters noted. And given the near consensus, its much more likely than not that he will not agree with her. The wiser decision is thus to refrain from pinging him.

Since she's not getting an apology, she needs to obtain "closure" on her own. And the best way to do that is through reprocessing the events-- by shifting her perception. Here again, the near consensus is useful in recalibrating, particularly since it leads to a non-traumatic interpretation.

Dots connected yet?
Posted by I Hate Screen Names]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:44:11 -0700 The Stranger Posted by Redhots]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:35:54 -0700 The Stranger Posted by clint]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:32:44 -0700 The Stranger Posted by Zebes]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:31:24 -0700 The Stranger http://impruvism.com/wp-content/uploads/…
Posted by venomlash]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:29:13 -0700 The Stranger Posted by howie in seattle]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:26:57 -0700 The Stranger I think Dan's a little over-cautious in his response. My guess is that your wife won't react badly to your cross-dressing thing. She may or may not agree to fucking you that way, but it sounds like she's highly unlikely to ridicule you for wanting it (especially if you remind her up front how devastating that would be). And I'm guessing getting through that conversation successfully will be deeply healing and pleasurable for you, sex or not. Frankly, I think it's very important to your emotional health to have that conversation.
The water sports thing is another story; why don't you see how the stockings and teddy thing goes, and then proceed accordingly. Rest assured we're all rooting for you.

Meanwhile, I urge you to file a complaint against your so-called marriage counselor. If "blew up" is a reasonably objective description, then loss of license would be justice, and possibly save others from similar abuse.
Posted by Farrah Whey]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:26:55 -0700 The Stranger Posted by sarah70]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:26:16 -0700 The Stranger Posted by sarah70]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:23:35 -0700 The Stranger
noting that Seattle has a poverty level higher than the state average.

it seems that Dom is turning into Erica Barnett: an ideologue posing as a journalist. one that never let's facts get in the way of their opinion or thesis.

i guess there's a little inflation involved here too. in 2008 Dom was "braying" about 300 sq ft studios, but now ridicules "classist NIMBYs" who are suggesting 220 sq ft should be the lower bar.
Posted by south downtown]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:21:44 -0700 The Stranger
If the rubbing was consensual, I think you have to forgive the boy. As Dan points out, teenage boys don't have a lot of control over their own bodies, and I bet he didn't realize what was happening until it was too late, either. That's sort of what "exploration" means.

If you contact him, and tell him how hurt you feel, he will probably apologize (unless he takes the advice of the person who points out that you could use that against him) but others are probably right that he doesn't remember the matter the same way you do. He probably remembers that he lost control, not that "he used you".

Now, if he was holding you down, and you were too scared and confused to push him off of you, and finally he came and then he freed you - then you were certainly violated. But in that case, the odds of him apologizing are very low. Because he's probably still a pos.

Either way, I don't think you gain anything by contacting him. I think you would do better to talk to a therapist, or overlay the memory with happier ones, or write a letter to yourself, or, I don't know, almost anything would be better than to drag him back into this at this late date. I just don't see much upside to that.

Good luck.
Posted by mother of two]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:21:02 -0700 The Stranger @14 you say Machiavellian like it was a bad thing.
Posted by Machiavelli was framed]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:19:40 -0700 The Stranger through the rocks
bathe in the river
of forgetfulness
curve so lightly
the tender bird
and the beast lay
unpondering their hypnotism
Posted by terrible hethen]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:10:50 -0700 The Stranger Posted by Will in Seattle]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:06:43 -0700 The Stranger
I'd say the vast majority of folks in the room were attending their 1st 43rd meeting. Ed did a great job of getting his folks out.
Posted by gnossos]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 23:01:48 -0700 The Stranger Posted by SpaceGirl]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 22:57:45 -0700 The Stranger Posted by seatackled]]> Tue, 21 May 2013 22:47:16 -0700 The Stranger