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  <rss version="2.0" xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom">
    <channel>
      <title>Comments On: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?
    
      by Dan Savage</title>
      <link>http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother</link>
      <atom:link href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Rss.xml?oid=15809187&amp;id=comments" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />      <description>Comments On: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?
    
      by Dan Savage</description>
      <language>en-us</language>
      <copyright>Copyright 2013 The Stranger. All rights reserved. This RSS file is offered to individuals, The Stranger readers, and non-commercial organizations only. Any commercial websites wishing to use this RSS file, please contact The Stranger.</copyright>
      <webMaster>webmaster@thestranger.com (The Stranger Webmaster)</webMaster>
      <pubDate>Sun, 19 May 2013 00:00:01 -0700</pubDate>
      <lastBuildDate>Sun, 19 May 2013 14:15:00 -0700</lastBuildDate>
      <generator>Foundation</generator>
      <docs>http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss</docs>
      
        
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15845565]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[charity35645]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[My name is charity from Canada and i have a testimony to share I broke up with my boyfriend last week and life became miserable for me until i found earlierthebetterspelltemple@gmail.com who cast a wonderful spell that brought him back to me i want to thank the temple for the spell that brought back my boyfriend in 4days. The temple is a great temple<br>
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=15845564">charity35645</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Fri, 25 Jan 2013 18:01:42 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15841558]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15841558]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[Puty]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Ultimately there's only so much you can do for someone whose mental illness makes them a total asshole. All you can do with him is mourn him and move on (and for your own mental health, find an excuse to avoid any farcical weddings you get invited to--lie like a rug if you have to but don't go).<br />
<br />
One thing that might make you feel better: get involved in the fight for same-sex rights. Your brother's story is an example of how evangelical delusions cause harm--to you, to your brother, to that poor fuck-up woman he's dating. You can't save your brother but you CAN work to change the world that enables his sickness. Good luck.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=1505653">Puty</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Fri, 25 Jan 2013 07:15:36 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15838857]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15838857]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[lolorhone]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[At this point in history, enough already. Asshole parents can have panic attacks about their children's sexuality. Dependent queer youth can have existential crises about their own sexuality, especially if they're attached to asshole parents. Adults acknowledge that life is unfair and then SUCK IT THE FUCK UP and live their lives proudly.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=15583913">lolorhone</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Thu, 24 Jan 2013 20:51:36 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15828049]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[Shaman]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[The letter is an obvious cry for attention from a hurt individual who is seeking validation or approval for his actions. Someone who is constantly self-hurting, looking for acceptance from others, and seeks conflict to validate their choices doesn't have an self inside that is solid. He is seeking the Self, but continues to seek external to his form and that will continue to roil into a cycle of more and more self-hatred until he decides for himself that he has suffered enough and is done with it. This might be on his death bed, but it will happen, so the advice here is pretty spot on. Be there for your brother BROS, but don't let yourself get entangled in his own personal samsāra.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=7080862">Shaman</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Thu, 24 Jan 2013 09:50:06 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15821246]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[karamzov]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[I came here to post the Mr. Show sketch and was very happy to see it was already here. And here it is again <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRT3zs23sLk" rel="nofollow">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRT3zs23s&hellip;</a> because it's amazing.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=14714027">karamzov</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 17:54:02 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15820325]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[milemarker]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[The alleged girlfriend is in for misery. I agree with Dan, but maybe the LR could slip the chick a few wise words about getting entangled with a screwed up head.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=9382217">milemarker</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 16:03:24 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15820310]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[gnot]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@69  There is a vast spectrum, along with the three standard subtypes for that diagnosis.  For example, since you aren't dead, you probably aren't someone with bipolar who when manic thinks he can fly.  Also, context.  He might be more prone to the attraction of culty/religious types than you, and during periods of mania/depression/normalcy wakes up from it a bit, which would explain the seeming silliness of this behavior pattern.  Some people are slow cyclers.  Regardless of diagnosis, you can surely see the attraction of conservative religion to someone in deep emotional pain, esp re: their sexuality, no?  Grown adults sign up for reeducation camps.  Gotta be a reason.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by gnot]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 15:59:30 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15818445]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[EclecticEel]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[I was worried about BRO's girlfriend. Then I realized she's probably his "Canadian girlfriend".
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=13441329">EclecticEel</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 12:38:44 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15818101]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[Hawke]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@42, having bipolar disorder did not make me install a revolving door in my closet.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=2248615">Hawke</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 12:16:42 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15817498]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[SunshineandPuppies]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[This poor woman.  I wonder if she knows BRO thinks they are in a relationship -- the kind of relationship you write home about -- after just three dates.  <br />
<br />
To me, a few dates does not a relationship make.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=10589536">SunshineandPuppies</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 11:16:11 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15816209]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[Alanmt]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[This guy sounds like that train wreck of a woman from Vermont who after years of abusive relationships had finally entered the first loving affirming relationship of her life when her new church convinced her to be straight again.  Pathetic and needy and weak.<br />
<br />
LW, I am sorry this guy is your brother.  If you have any other young and impressionable gay relatives, please keep them away from this train wreck of a life.    Maybe someday, with extensive therapy, he will find a place of equilibrium and realize his problems have nothiing to do with his sexuality.  Until then, love him on the inside and be indifferent on the outside.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=3641266">Alanmt</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 09:28:59 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15816197]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[EricaP]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@65, bisexual in a way which denies that he might ever be attracted to guys again? That's not bisexual, that's trouble.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=1550045">EricaP</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 09:27:32 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15815886]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[RTam]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[I'm with @3 Thexalon, does no one want to consider that the man is bi?  Seems to me that the only people that think you CAN change your orientation are the ones that are naturally attracted to both genders.  Perhaps this guy is always going back and forth because he finds himself attracted to different genders at different times.<br />
<br />
Or maybe not, maybe he's just a drama queen with mental health issues, but folks, bi-sexuality is real.  We need to acknowledge it as a possibility in these cases.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=7333727">RTam</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 08:39:23 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15814920]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[singing cynic]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[DAMN @51, I was literally just about to post that.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=1500322">singing cynic</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 06:31:21 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
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    <author><![CDATA[Alanmt]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Unfortunately, LW can't even show his bro Dan's brilliant response because it will feed into bro's drama queen lusts.<br />
<br />
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=3641266">Alanmt</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 06:30:36 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
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    <author><![CDATA[mtnlion]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@51, I haven't even clicked it, but it's David Cross and all his relapses into homosinuality right?  God I fucking love Mr. Show.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=10991474">mtnlion</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 05:46:24 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15814571]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[sheiler]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@20 for the win, people.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=1548404">sheiler</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 03:58:05 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15814155]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[I Fucked Your Dad]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Sell your brother into slavery and forget about him. He's a fucking mess and a total waste of your time.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=15814143">I Fucked Your Dad</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 02:26:15 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15814115]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[Endash]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@gromm bipolar doesn't mean what you think it means and it certainly doesn't mean "completely insane."
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=6786471">Endash</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 01:35:43 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15813888]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[JJinAus]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Train wreck looking for a venue....
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=8172977">JJinAus</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2013 00:23:39 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15813835]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15813835]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[they're not drawn to nice people anyway]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@21: "lots of women like a "project". They think they can fix whatever is wrong with a defective boyfriend and make husband material out of him. "<br>
<br>
They already said that these women were broken. Of course they exist! Broken people keeping other fucked-up people off the market since eternity.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by they're not drawn to nice people anyway]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Tue, 22 Jan 2013 23:47:36 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15813830]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15813830]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[he should join mars hill]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Seriously, the only thing you can do with drama queens and hatesoaks like these is to smile and nod and act like they're the boringest fuckers that ever lived.<br>
<br>
People LOVE going born-again for the lovebombing and perceived "hate" from former friends that they can then feed back into their charismatic "new friends" as a bonding moment.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by he should join mars hill]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Tue, 22 Jan 2013 23:42:36 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15813825]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[nocutename]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@32:Much better.<br />
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=1936949">nocutename</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Tue, 22 Jan 2013 23:39:29 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15813205]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[sirkowski]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@53 Even better.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=1532765">sirkowski</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Tue, 22 Jan 2013 22:25:39 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: SL Letter of the Day: What Do I Say to My Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay/Ex-Straight/Ex-Gay Brother?]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15813138]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/2013/01/22/sl-letter-of-the-day-brother-2-brother/#15813138]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[chi_type]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Cool story, Bro!
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=7917797">chi_type</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Tue, 22 Jan 2013 21:53:47 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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