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  <rss version="2.0" xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom">
    <channel>
      <title>Comments On: Savage Love
    
      by Dan Savage</title>
      <link>http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525</link>
      <atom:link href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Rss.xml?oid=16112525&amp;id=comments" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />      <description>Comments On: Savage Love
    
      by Dan Savage</description>
      <language>en-us</language>
      <copyright>Copyright 2013 The Stranger. All rights reserved. This RSS file is offered to individuals, The Stranger readers, and non-commercial organizations only. Any commercial websites wishing to use this RSS file, please contact The Stranger.</copyright>
      <webMaster>webmaster@thestranger.com (The Stranger Webmaster)</webMaster>
      <pubDate>Sat, 25 May 2013 00:00:01 -0700</pubDate>
      <lastBuildDate>Sat, 25 May 2013 08:15:00 -0700</lastBuildDate>
      <generator>Foundation</generator>
      <docs>http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss</docs>
      
        
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16325387]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16325387]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[Mary5757]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Dr. Malhotra was my OBGYN in Vancouver while I lived there, and she is the best OBGYN I've ever had. Though she works in one of the busiest OBGYN offices in downtown Vancity, I always felt she was fully present with me and all my concerns during my visits, and she never judged, and was always supportive!
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=14278520">Mary5757</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Sat, 23 Mar 2013 11:15:05 -0700</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16260953]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16260953]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[DanLOVE]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[I just want to add to the pro-IUD side.  After an unintended pregnancy, I got an IUD and I love it.  It's the copper IUD, I've had mine almost 10 years with no problems.  <br>
<br>
Regarding getting it inserted (installed, ha-ha):  It was a little uncomfortable, but not bad at all.  Several people are writing about painful insertion, but my insertion was really nothing notable.   And my cramps haven't gotten worse since i had the IUD.  I think it's the best form of birth control ever.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by DanLOVE]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Fri, 15 Mar 2013 00:18:59 -0700</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16260756]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16260756]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[naked chilli]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[best column ever
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=2653533">naked chilli</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Thu, 14 Mar 2013 22:45:43 -0700</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16214409]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16214409]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[auntie grizelda]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[I'm still waiting to see the pictures of Helvetica Bold, Dan!<br />
Have they been posted yet?
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=1498896">auntie grizelda</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Sun, 10 Mar 2013 15:48:03 -0700</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16211861]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16211861]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[Learn From My Mistake]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[A women who is not in a committed, monogamous, disease-free relationship should NOT get an IUD without also using condoms 100% of the time. The IUD creates and open passage for bacteria and other microbes to enter the uterus and can endanger fertility. I am one such victim. I was not able to use the pill due to dramatic hormonal side effects. When I was dating my husband, we both got HIV screens before stopping condom use and I had an IUD implanted. We didn't know that one of us was chlamydia positive. Within a month of IUD placement I was entering surgery for ovarian abscess drainage. We were devastated to learn a few months ago, after a year of trying to get pregnant, that I'm now infertile. Condoms, condoms, condoms people.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by Learn From My Mistake]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Sun, 10 Mar 2013 07:15:11 -0700</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16186125]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16186125]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[local897]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Any drug, including any birth control, may have significant side effects. She may want to quit if the side effects are bad. Being 3000 miles away from the only doctor she knows will make it hard to quit an IUD or implant. I'd recommend a good conversation with the doctor she knows, then pills until she finds a doctor she trusts at school. She writes as if she expects this doctor to remain her primary care physician, on breaks maybe, and it's a blind spot in Dan's response not to make clear that she needs to find a doctor at school too. Once she finds a local doctor she trusts to do any immediate follow up care that might be necessary, it would be time to think about and IUD or implant.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by local897]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 06 Mar 2013 23:25:22 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16176591]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16176591]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[ISIHAC]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@EricaP @Crinoline It's fine, my PIV was totally wanted ;-) I guess what I was trying to say that just because one isn't intending to have sex any time in the near future doesn't mean one won't. If you'd asked me the very day before my first PIV-sexing I would have replied that I of course had no need for BC because I wasn't intending to sex with anyone anytime soon.<br />
<br />
And if I didn't already know that emergency contraception was easily available (and that I already had the next day off work to get it sorted) I wouldn't have had the sex. But the LW is in the US where I keep hearing that BC is sometimes harder to get hold of?<br />
<br />
If we are playing the "should have" game then perhaps what I "should have" done was gone on BC two years ago when I started doing sexual but non-pregnancy-causing stuff.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=16119056">ISIHAC</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 06 Mar 2013 03:42:51 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16168620]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16168620]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[M1chelle]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[TIMELY, you are so cool I can't even quantify it! I wish more young women would think about birth control options BEFORE their first time having intercourse, instead of after. I agree that condoms should be used as well in order to prevent STIs/STDs. It's the most sure-fire way to do so. As Dan's source said, it's great to figure out what birth control method works the best for your body and your lifestyle before you start having sex, so that you know you will use it consistently and correctly (thus decreasing its failure rate). Good luck, with both your birth control search and with college!
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by M1chelle]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Tue, 05 Mar 2013 13:27:52 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16164075]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[KittyWrangler]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@178 Wouldn't that be "androgynomorphophiles"?
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=5272356">KittyWrangler</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 22:05:51 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16162863]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[Kyarochan]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[I was 19 when I first took the birth control pill. The first I was prescribed meant I bled all the time for the first month (the only month I took it), and it gave me a face like a lunar landscape.  Perhaps the point was that nobody would want to have sex with me...?<br>
The second one I took gave me three months of slightly less bad side effects, then settled down. But...<br>
Years later, I stopped taking it, suspicious that it was dampening some of my emotional responses, including libido. I immediately felt much better, and, well, much better. My moods are mine, and I'm glad to have them back. There was no change to my cycle.<br>
I would go with condoms. Only a barrier method is going to prevent against STDs, and there are plenty of people out there passing those around.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=16162862">Kyarochan</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 18:53:05 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16162495]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[mydriasis]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@220<br />
<br />
As I mentioned earlier, there's a great deal of evidence suggesting that college aged people are less likely to consider condoms important if they're on the pill. Yeah, in a perfect world people would use both, but in the real world, people (at least in that demographic) typically don't. So that's why it makes sense to treat it as an either or situation, though it certainly doesn't have to me.<br />
<br />
@griz<br />
<br />
Thanks :)
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=7636207">mydriasis</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 17:58:17 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16162008]]></link>

    <guid isPermaLink="true"><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16162008]]></guid>
    <author><![CDATA[auntie grizelda]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@218 mydriasis: No wonder you're so good in chemistry--good for you!!<br />
That was one academic science I avoided--because I was afraid of possibly blowing up the classroom.<br />
As a humbling result, I continue to suck at other forms of...chemistry.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=1498896">auntie grizelda</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 17:20:49 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16160423]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[BeccaLiz]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Another two cents to the IUD pile: I have one - copper - and I think it's fan-dab-tastic. It does, however, cause heavier periods and really wicked menstrual cramping. Things to be aware of: iron deficiency(!) and mefenamic acid. It's the wonder-pill which makes periods lighter and cramps just melt away. I do have to medicate a little for my IUD, but it's so so worth it to not have a bay just yet.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by BeccaLiz]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 14:22:09 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16160389]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[squirrely girl]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[The number of folks here trying to talk TIMELY out of birth control is appalling. Yes, condoms are a given... but suggesting a young woman forgo other methods of birth control is how young women end up pregnant. <br />
<br />
If you're serious about pregnancy prevention, using two methods is highly promoted. <br />
<br />
If TIMELY is reading this, please just go talk to your doc.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=5390230">squirrely girl</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 14:12:19 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16159756]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[Eirene]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[The cis- and trans- prefixes are common in ordinary Latin as well -- as in Cisalpine and Transalpine Gaul.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=13807915">Eirene</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 13:17:46 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16158788]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[mydriasis]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Seandr,<br />
<br />
I minored in chemistry (and physiology) and majored in neuroscience. I'm taking some time out of school to work before going back again. :)
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=7636207">mydriasis</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 10:37:40 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16158466]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[seandr]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@mydriasis: Are you a chemical engineer? Premed?
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=1501255">seandr</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 09:37:44 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16158042]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[mydriasis]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@214<br />
<br />
Wait... do you actually think that Dan invented the application of "cis" and "trans" to sexuality? He didn't.<br />
<br />
Besides, cis vs. trans molecules are classically diastereomers, not enantiomers, I mean, sure, a cis or trans molecule COULD be chiral as well (assuming there's at least one sp3 hybridized carbon as well as the two sp2 hybridized carbons that made up the cis or trans double bond), but cis or trans isn't referring to that property, dex/levo/R/S is.<br />
<br />
Happy?
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=7636207">mydriasis</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 08:58:21 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16157711]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[Michael63]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Helvetica Bold, Dan? Now I'm even more of a fan!
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=3737898">Michael63</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 08:07:46 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16155607]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[GaucheG]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[I'm exhausted by slogging through this whole thread, and yet NOBODY else awarded you the kudos for the Organic Chem references?? (three by my count) I'd have thought that your readers were more astute, adroit, and aware of chiral asymmetry.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=16155606">GaucheG</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Mon, 04 Mar 2013 00:55:11 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16154377]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[mydriasis]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Interesting word choice there. Kind of showing your hand.<br />
<br />
Anyway, I'm sure your turtle is <i>very</i> nice.
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=7636207">mydriasis</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Sun, 03 Mar 2013 18:59:10 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
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    <author><![CDATA[Hunter78]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[My partner's been with me since 1990. She counts herself happy.<br />
        
        <br />
        
          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=4005909">Hunter78</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Sun, 03 Mar 2013 17:53:44 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16153606]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[JillInTheCity]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[When I was in college, I used one of the insertable foams/gels from the drugstore and it is still my preferred method, with the Today sponge second.  Anything hormonal is screwing with my entire body and the Pill has killed my libido every time, in every formulation;; localized barrier method is the lowest impact to the system.  Yes, these mean your partner may not want to go down on you because of taste after they are inserted BUT having that conversation  is a great litmus test for identifying men who should be avoided. Also, I heartily second the idea of getting yourself some sex toys and knowing how to pleasure yourself before involving another person.
        
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          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=16153605">JillInTheCity</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Sun, 03 Mar 2013 15:45:10 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16152648]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[IPJ]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[@208: Why yes, lots of them do. Men too!<br />
<br />
She wrote in saying she intended to go to college. Not that she absolutely positively never wanted to have children, which is a totally different thing. I don't think the problem is that she got the two confused.
        
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          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=1637029">IPJ</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Sun, 03 Mar 2013 13:22:37 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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    <title><![CDATA[Re: Savage Love]]></title>

    
    <link><![CDATA[http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/SavageLove?oid=16112525&show=comments#16152644]]></link>

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    <author><![CDATA[GG1000]]></author>
    <description>
      
      <![CDATA[Dan, Dan. Helvetica? Really?? How embarassing for you.
        
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          Posted by <a href="http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/Profile?oid=4252701">GG1000</a>]]>
    </description>
    <pubDate>Sun, 03 Mar 2013 13:18:10 -0800</pubDate>
    <source url="http://www.thestranger.com">The Stranger</source>
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