The Stranger

An adaptation of a favorite book is almost always a colossal letdown. How can it compete with the version in your heart? Book-It's production of A Confederacy of Dunces is exceptional: It is absolutely, unbelievably anti-disappointing. Brandon Whitehead deserves a Nobel Prize for his embodiment of flatulent, grandiose grump Ignatius J. Reilly. The rest of the cast is just fantastic. Mary Machala, the director and scriptwriter, should be the patron saint of adapters. This is funny, funny stuff! You must go. (Center House Theatre, Seattle Center, 684-7200. 2 and 7:30 pm, $35. Through Oct 11.) by Bethany Jean Clement

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This thoughtfully curated collection of locally produced shorts, features, and archival films is unafraid of experimentation and steps outside of the standard no-budget tropes of so many amateur productions (seriously, people, enough with the horror comedies). Today's feature is American Collectors, which David Schmader called "fascinating" if "a bit of a rough cut," but worthwhile films are playing all week. (Friday's opening-night selection, The Mountain, the River, and the Road, is a sweet mumblecore love story.) (Northwest Film Forum, 1515 12th Ave, www.nwfilmforum.org. 7 pm, $9.) by Lindy West

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Last year's Stranger Genius for literature is perhaps the greatest reader of his own work in the writing business. He makes his listeners literally slap their knees with laughter one moment and moves them to tears the next. (I've seen it happen.) He's debuting his new collection of stories, War Dances, tonight. Alexie is always at his best when he reads new material. Many of these stories are about bad decisions (hate crimes, affairs), and there's nothing funnier—or sadder—than stories about bad decisions. This reading should be amazing. (Town Hall, 1119 Eighth Ave, 652-4255. 7:30 pm, $5.)

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Christians are right about one thing when it comes to atheists: We can be obnoxious when we confront believers. Usually, being a good atheist means quietly affirming your disbelief and demonstrating atheism's worth by example. But not tonight. Leading atheist rabble-rouser Richard Dawkins reads from his newest book, The Greatest Show on Earth: The Evidence for Evolution. It soundly refutes the dumb Christian argument that evolution is "just a theory." Tonight, let your unbeliever freak flag fly and celebrate your godlessness. (Hec Edmundson Pavilion, 3870 Montlake Blvd NE, 634-3400. 7:30 pm, free.) by Paul Constant

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What's HUMP! 5 got? Sluts on the SLUT, gay boys in Dumpsters, straight boys getting pegged. It's got anal hooks, E.T., and Larry King! The Stranger's annual amateur and locally produced porn festival is in its fifth year, and it just keeps getting bigger and better. This year's HUMP! has more films, more shocks, more laughs, and more screenings—most of which are sold out, but rush tickets are usually available five minutes before each show. The audience votes for its favorite films in two categories—funniest and sexiest—and cash prizes are awarded to deserving filmmakers. Once the festival is over, all copies of the films are destroyed. The only place to see HUMP! is at HUMP! (On the Boards, 100 W Roy St, thestranger.com/hump. $20, 18+.) by Dan Savage

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