Alan Becker
His company, Insight America Touring Theatre, is doing a short run of Edward Albee's The Zoo Story at the Northwest Actors Studio, 1100 E Pike, 325-6500, before taking it to Europe.

Your character in the play has a long story about a disgusting dog. Do you like dogs? "I like disgusting dogs. Dogs are like people in a lot of ways--they eat, they poop, they bite you sometimes--wait, I'm talking about some of my boyfriends. I've always wanted a boyfriend who was like a golden retriever: big, stupid, licks you a lot, but always friendly. It seems like my boyfriends have always been Chihuahuas and pit bulls."

Are you more of a dog person than a cat person? "Well, really, I hate dogs. And cats."

Why? "Well--cats are a lot like people. I think I'd better leave it there before I get into anything more about my ex-boyfriends."

How about fish? Do you like fish? "Only the ones without bones. It really drives me crazy to be eating a fish and get a bone in my throat or wherever. Now we've gotten back to my boyfriends again."

What's the most violent thing that's ever happened to you? "I was beaten up in a Las Vegas parking lot by a drug dealer."

Were you seeking drugs at the time? "No, I was dating his... well, I was going out with... someone that he wanted to be going out with."

A chorus boy? "No, a blackjack dealer."

Were you badly hurt? "It felt like my nose was broken, but it wasn't. I got a terrific black eye. The ambulance driver refused to take me to the hospital because I was too upset, he said."

Because you were too upset?! "He said I must calm down before he would take care of me. At which I said, hysterically, 'Haven't you ever seen anyone who's hysterical before? Don't they teach you about this?'"

What did he say? "I don't recall."

You were too hysterical. "I did get to the doctor eventually, who determined that the nose wasn't broken, it just made a funny clicking sound."

A black eye is a nice conversation starter. "Yes, I made quite a lot of new friends that way."

Interview by Bret Fetzer