Don Jon is a new movie directed by, written, and starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt as a porn addict who gets into a relationship with Scarlett Johansson, who disapproves of his porn consumption. It costars Tony Danza (!?!), and it's packed with New Jersey accents.
Alison Agosti expected to see some weird shit when she attended Nicolas Cage's estate sale. Turns out the first weird and awful thing she saw—a dog peeing blood—turned out to be just about the only weird and awful thing she saw. But the whole report, which just went up at HitFix, is worth reading anyway:
My friend and I walked in, really just prepared for anything. At the very least, a sex dungeon, a secret tea room, SWORDS (I was expecting a lot of swords), but we were greeted only by a small foyer with a lone Egyptian-themed chair and some cardboard boxes. I was already wondering If I should have stayed outside for the conclusion of the blood peeing dog saga. Forward was an expansive living room, and to our right was a small weight room. We chose to go into the weight room first. I want you to know that it smelled exactly like a recently emptied canister of Pringles. Not original either, maybe pizza? Or cheddar? None of the equipment was any newer that maybe the late-80s. An old stationary bike, weights, and a menagerie of boxing gloves (including several pairs with flames, which would be a theme throughout the house). I began to feel a sinking suspicion that while this may have been a house that Cage owned, he certainly didn’t spend much time here.
Go read the whole thing, and then spend the rest of the afternoon daydreaming about the wonders Agosti would have found in a just world.
Officers working an emphasis patrol in Golden Gardens pulled into the park's upper parking lot just after midnight and spotted a crowd of about 40 juveniles cheering on a group of two or three people fighting (although, spoiler alert, it might've been one person fighting themselves).
And that's why our police blotter is the best one in the country.
by Jen Graves
on Tue, May 21, 2013 at 12:41 PM
Courtesy Warner Bros
THICKER, UGLIER, BETTER Leo is becoming Brando by the minute.
After watching Baz Luhrmann's movie The Great Gatsby Saturday night (Paul's review), a local 12-year-old who had insisted even before the film began that it was too long decided to test whether she could read the book in a shorter time than it took her to watch the movie.
The movie lasted 142 minutes. She clocked in at 156. She declared the book better, with the added implication that she should not have been dragged to the movie. Yes, but then she wouldn't have spent her Sunday reading the book. She had to admit this was logical.
A few years ago at On the Boards, a New York theater company performed the entire book while reading it line by line onstage in a production called Gatz, and that took more than six hours. And people loved it.
Paul's written before about folks making time-to-entertainment equations for themselves to determine how much they think things should cost: That, say, a book offers more hours of entertainment than a movie or a play, so it should cost more. I've honestly never thought about it this way, and it seems batty. But everybody's busy, time is at a premium, etc etc (I don't even have time to flesh out this concept in this sentence, for instance), so... do you think time should be money when it comes to movies and books and theater? And if you do, is longer better, or is shorter and more "efficient" better?
Lars Von Trier's upcoming movie Nymphomaniac was supposed to feature a bunch of movie stars (including Shia LaBeouf, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Christian Slater, and Uma Thurman) having full-on pornographic sex. But now, World of Wonder Report reveals the truth about the sex in the film:
The film will use digital technology to combine the actors with body doubles. She said they shot the actors pretending to have sex and the body doubles actually having sex. “And in post,” she said, “we will digital-impose the two. So above the waist it will be the star and the below the waist it will be the double.”
That's a long way to go for a joke. What do you think?
What Do You Think About Von Trier Using the Bottom Half of Digital Doubles in Nymphomaniac?
Have you seen Star Trek Into Darkness yet? Though its first weekend was considered a bit of a financial disappointment, it still pulled in $86.7 million during its extended opening weekend, which means the odds are high that at least some Slog readers saw it. So what did you think? After the video below, I'm going to talk about all the spoiler-y stuff I couldn't discuss in my review last week.
This weekend brings a bunch of SIFF stuff that the Stranger SIFF Review Board loved, including the Wikileaks documentary We Steal Secrets, Noah Baumbach's and Greta Gerwig's Manhattan-flavored comedy Frances Ha, the dead pet-fetishizing documentaryFurever, the French family farm-fetishizing documentary After Winter, Spring, and the modern-day adaptation of Henry James' What Maisie Knew.
And in the non-SIFF world, there's Francois Ozon's In the House, the highly effective Filipino kidnapping thriller Graceland, and the cliche-ridden mob film The Iceman, plus all them StarTrekIronManGreatGatsbyblockbusters.
SIFF has a dozen or so movies about food, or farming, or fruit, or wine, etc. this year, and of the ones that we were able to screen by press time, we REALLY liked four (good job, SIFF!).
DON'T MISS! After Winter, Spring Is there anything cuter than a farmer rubbing the fuzzy face of an hour-old calf, asking, "Is there anything cuter than this?" Yes: when the farmer and the calf and the question are all French, as is the case in this achingly lovely documentary about family farming in the Périgord. Shot over the course of a year, it's so pretty, it's ridiculous, and the people—from the idealistic couple starting a tiny organic operation to the 88-year-old vintner/philosopher—are marvelous. Facing tough times, they love their animals and their land with inspiring hope. Also featured: a famous foie gras farm, cast in a human and arguably humane light. (BETHANY JEAN CLEMENT) Harvard Exit, Sun, May 19, 4 pm SIFF Uptown, Mon, May 20, 8:30 pm
STAR! C.O.G. Inspired by reading The Grapes of Wrath and wanting to get his hands dirty, an overeducated white East Coast Yale grad heads out to Oregon to work in the apple orchards. Based on a David Sedaris essay from Naked, the story begins on the long-haul bus ride, where "Samuel" (his new identity) is accosted by a parade of weirdos. At the farm, he has trouble connecting with anyone and he is comically unprepared to exist in the real world. Will Samuel find happiness in the simple things instead of overanalyzing and sneering at everything? Or will he run back to his old life? Thanks to the film's wonderful performances and entertaining dialogue, you'll have a perfectly good (if not revelatory) time finding out. (GILLIAN ANDERSON) Egyptian, Fri, May 24, 4 pm Egyptian, Sun, May 26, 7 pm Renton, Mon, May 27, 6 pm