From the Apr 4 – Apr 10, 2002 issue

Columns

Celebrity I Saw U

by Adrian Ryan

Heaven forbid that downright frumpy Rosie O'Donnell should ever be considered a trendsetter, but at least one semi-notable local seems to be following in her now openly dykish tread. Who, you ask? Jean Enersen? Maria Cantwell? No such luck. It's waning fitness maven Susan Powter. When the gym guru was still basking in her 15 minutes and had a radio program, she stubbornly maintained her dubious heterosexuality, but continually lamented that she "wished" she were a dyke--they're so cool, and men are SUCH pigs, dontcha know. Well, it seems that Susan--now firmly, and I suspect permanently, out of the limelight (does anyone ever come out when they're still on top?)--has gotten her wish and finally step-turn-kicked her way firmly and permanently out of the closet.

Eyewitnesses report that Susan's fat-free fanny was spotted at the dyke-drenched opening of the play Girl Meets Girl at Northwest Actors Studio, on the arm of a lovely, lithe thirtysomething femme, with whom she shared several encouraging smooches during the show. (Are you paying attention Jodie Foster? Lucy Lawless? Candice Bergen? Oprah, Roseanne, Pink...?)

Remember Stephen Williams, the troubled and troublesome roommate from our very own Real World Seattle season? He was the dude infamous for smacking poor Lyme-disease-addled Irene McGee in the "bitch slap heard 'round the world"--the only unmitigated act of roommate-on-roommate violence ever captured on the show. Well, according to www.thesmokinggun.com and MTV's TRL, Stephen was ARRESTED last week in L.A. for "joyriding" in a hot car. The coup? He already had three warrants out for his arrest--for prostitution! Since all sources failed to clarify whether Stephen was the alleged hooker or the alleged hookee, I wrote to Stephen's adorable ex-RW roomie Lindsay Brien (now in Atlanta), hoping she'd share her thoughts. "I don't have time to think about it--I have to find a new place to live; the people above me are so loud, I can hear EVERYTHING they do--it's grossing me out!" Uh-huh. More updates as events unfold....

Guitar genius Carlos Santana performed at a private benefit at the Mercer Island manse of Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen--raising a tidy $1 million for the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center. No outings, arrests, or bitch slaps were reported at this event. And Tom Arnold and Kiefer Sutherland were spotted at a star-drenched benefit for Ronald McDonald House held at the trendy W Hotel. No outings, arrests, or bitch slaps were reported at this event either.

celebisawu@thestranger.com