Kyle Moseby
WEDNESDAY 4/13

ORALLY FIXATED

Michelle Leigh's showcase focuses on storytelling—she says it's "inspired by people like David Sedaris and Mike Birbiglia, writers who are able to combine narratives and comedy." Each show consists of eight or so comics pontificating on a preordained theme. This month's show (which will feature Emmett Montgomery, Mighty Carlo, Devin Thomas Badoo, and others) concerns "eighth grade horror stories." The over-under on boners is 14. Seattle Comedy Underground, 8:30 pm, $8, all ages.

THURS–SAT 4/14–16

DAVID KOECHNER

"I will smash your face into a car windshield and then take your mother, Dorothy Mantooth, out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again." Parlor Live, Thurs 7:30 pm, Fri–Sat 7:30 and 10 pm, $20–$35, 21+.

TUESDAY 4/19

TRIUMPH AND TRAGEDY

Emmett Montgomery's weekly open mic at the Crescent (!!!) is genius: It takes crusty regulars and crustier comedians and puts them in a jar half filled with Jägermeister and Skittles, and shakes the jar until either someone dies or someone gets pregnant. Then everyone does karaoke together! It's like world peace, only drunker. Crescent Lounge, 7 pm, free, 21+.