CELEBRITY

Made-to-Order Cover Songs: Ever wanted to hear Harvey Danger play “Mr. Roboto”? Or Dina Martina sing “Flagpole Sitta”? Now’s your chance to make your cover-song dreams come true—the high bidder for each will get a recording of the artist singing the song of his or her choice! Fucking fuck!


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Harvey Danger Cover the Song of Your Choice

Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99

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BOAT Cover the Song of Your Choice

Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99

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Dina Martina Covers the Song of Your Choice

Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99

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“Awesome” Cover the Song of Your Choice

Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99

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Lunch with Five Fags

Meet the real “Gay Mafia” at this Olympia power lunch with legislators/real-life homosexuals Ed Murray, Jamie Pedersen, Joe McDermott, Jim Moeller, and Dave Upthegrove! Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99!

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Hugh Foskett's Package

You know what they say about being just a six-pack away—find out if the former Republican 43rd District candidate is just a few chugalugs short of dumping his conservative roots and migrating to a, shall we say, more-flexible position. An afternoon lunch with Mr. Foskett and a veritable wall of Miller beer to help break the ice. Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99!

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Rat City Rollergirls Birthday Bash

For years, the Rat City Rollergirls have kicked ass and blown minds with their fearless, feminist-flavored roller derby. This rock ’n’ rollergirl birthday package includes two full passes to the Rat City Rollergirls 2007 season, two RCR T-shirts, and a birthday party at the 2007 bout of your choice! The announcers, mascots, and Rollergirls will lead the crowd in singing “Happy Birthday,” after which you’ll enjoy delicious Cupcake Royale cupcakes. After the bout, enjoy pizza and beer with some of your favorite Rollergirls! Swoon! Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99!

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A Copy of the Shortbus Screenplay Signed by Director John Cameron Mitchell

Screenplay Signed by Director John Cameron Mitchell Own a piece of cinema history—the script for this year’s finest sex comedy (with unsimulated sex!), signed by director (and director and star of Hedwig and the Angry Inch) John Cameron Mitchell. PLUS 123 Shortbus condoms and a movie soundtrack. Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99!

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Attend a Sonics Game with Sherman Alexie and Dan Savage

You and a guest sit with Stranger editor Dan Savage and Sherman Alexie, the self-proclaimed 78th-best writer in America, who wrote in this very paper: “And so I see every basketball game as a chapter of the novel known as a season. And I see each season as another volume in an unending series of mysteries…. And, yes, I love Luke Ridnour. And I hate the little fucker, too.” Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99!

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Showgirls with David Schmader

When he’s not busy as an editor and columnist for The Stranger, David Schmader moonlights as the world’s foremost authority on the brilliant horribleness of Paul Verhoeven’s Showgirls, hosting annotated screenings of the film across the U.S. and providing the commentary track for MGM’s 10th-anniversary Showgirls DVD. The winner of this package will receive a private screening of Showgirls with David Schmader in his or her very own home! Plus a Showgirls-enhancing water pipe from Piece of Mind! Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99!

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Ride the Ducks with Cienna Madrid

Under the guise of Our Worst Enemy™, Stranger writer Cienna Madrid has turned social and cultural suffering into a comedic art form. Here’s your chance to watch her wince through an awkward and painful experience with your very own eyes! You and a friend get to sit with Cienna Madrid on a guided tour of Seattle on one of those amphibious duck buses. Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99!

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Gay Bingo with Sally Clark

Long before she seized a position of power on the Seattle City Council, Sally Clark made a name for herself as one of the funnest people in town. Councilwoman Clark will host a table for you and eight friends at Gay Bingo, with drinks, daubers, and dinner on the house! Plus très fashionable O-69 hat and T-shirt! Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99!

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SuttonBeresCuller Tree-Trimming Party

John Sutton, Ben Beres, and Zac Culler, the concept-art trio, have earned legions of fans and one Stranger Genius Award with their witty and accomplished installation art. For one lucky winner, SuttonBeresCuller will come to your house and give your Christmas tree a good arting-over. You provide the supplies, they’ll provide the fun. So motherfucking priceless! Opening bid: $1.99!

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BeDazzled with Ben Exworthy

A package fit for Midas himself, featuring a shiny gold double date with benevolent bazillionaire Ben Exworthy and his wife Brit, starting with the proper uniform: a shirt (hand-BeDazzled by Brit!) and gold lamé pants. Then the defiantly glittery quartet hit the town with disco roller-skating at Tiffany’s Skate Inn in Puyallup, a 24-karat dinner at a fancy Seattle restaurant, then karaoke at Goldie’s on Airport Way South. PLUS 2,000 glittery superballs, a bottle of Goldschlager, and a copy of Door Man’s Daughter, the latest CD by the amazing Leslie & the LY’s, led by Leslie “Gem Sweater Girl” Hall and featuring such hits as “Beat-Dazzler,” and “Gem Sweater Revisited”! (EXTRA-SPECIAL PLUS 10 gold-star GameHouse games and your very own rhinestones and BeDazzler.) Priceless! Opening bid: $1.99

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