The Five Senses, Nutty Professor 2: The Klumps, Sex: The Annabel Chong Story, Coen Brothers Retrospective

*Bring on Buster Keaton!
A non-commercial refuge from the voracious onslaught of summer cinema directed greedily at children, the Grand Illusion's Summer Children's Film Series is back for a fourth season, offering rare programs aimed at speaking with, not down to, children. This week: Load up on Count Chocula and laugh yourself silly to three short films from the master of the sight gag, including the jaw-dropping One Week. Sat-Sun & Tues July 22-23 & 25. Grand Illusion

Buena Vista Social Club
While scoring Wim Wenders' 1997 film The End of Violence, Ry Cooder gave him a copy of a tape he made with the Cuban "super-group," the Buena Vista Social Club. Wenders was instantly won over. When Cooder returned to produce another album, Wenders came with him, and brought a film crew along for the ride. With no script to follow, the story unfolds naturally. The camera leisurely cruises the streets of Havana, picking up bits and pieces. (Gillian G. Gaar) Tues-Thurs July 25-27. Varsity Calendar

C. C. and Company
Back again for a sixth season, Linda's Summer Movies is the original outdoor drinking/film-watching extravaganza, presented, as always, FOR FREE!! By the time the plot falls apart, you'll be too drunk to care!! This week, one-time Superbowl champ and Flex-all 454 shill Joe Namath raises hell as an outlaw biker in 1970's C. C. and Company. Wed July 26. Linda's Tavern

Casablanca
Humphrey Bogart plays a Dancing Bear in this thinly veiled adaptation of The Autobiography of P. T. Barnum. Ingrid Bergman co-stars as a trampoline. Fri July 21. Fremont Friday Night Outdoor Movies

Chuck & Buck
Opens Fri July 21. See review this issue. Broadway Market

Cinema Implosion!
Wed July 26. See Stranger Suggests. Little Theatre

Cold Water
Opens Thurs July 20. See review this issue. Little Theatre

*Enter the Dragon
The original, and still favorite, Fremont Outdoor Cinema is back for one last year in the nice, soft parking lot where it started the trend. This week, Seattle's own (yeah, right) Bruce Lee shows off the original washboard stomach in the original Kung Fu film. Shown with Billy Jack as part of "'70s Kick Ass" night. With pre-show music from Cornucopia at 8. Sat July 22. Fremont Outdoor Cinema

Funny Old Films
Hokum Hall presents this summer series of lighthearted silent films with live musical accompaniment by the Wurlitzer Hope-Jones Unit Orchestra, and hosted by Professor Hokum W. Jeebs. This week feautures the quiet hilarity of Felix in Hollywood (1926), Hearts and Diamonds (1914), and Max and his Mother-in-Law (1912). Tues-Wed July 25-26. Hokum Hall

*Genghis Blues
Genghis Blues is the story of blind bluesman Paul Peña's discovery of the ancient throat-singing technique of Tuva. Throat-singing allows a person to produce up to four notes at once; Roko and Adrian Belic's film produces many kinds of joy at once, as they and a group of musicians accompany Pena to Tuva in order to meet Kongar-ol Ondar, the country's leading singer. (Ray Pride) Tues-Thurs July 25-27. Varsity Calendar

*Hairspray
The sister-cinema to the Fremont Outdoor Cinema, the West Seattle Walk-In screens John Waters' brilliant musical comedy Hairspray, the most underrated American film... EVER. Just ask Debbie Harry, who will be sexier than your mother until death takes her from us. Cheryl Serio provides pre-show music at 8. Fri July 21. West Seattle Walk-In Cinema

*Holiday
Holiday gives Katherine Hepburn one of her best roles--smart, sexy, with just the right touch of movie star martyrdom--as a dissatisfied rich girl who falls in love with her brother-in-law to-be. If it seems incongruous to focus on Hepburn while the film is screening in a Cary Grant series, just watch how generous Grant is to his leading lady, how his glow in her presence makes us love her all the more, and see if you don't agree he was the best screen partner she ever had, Spencer Tracy notwithstanding. (Bruce Reid) Thurs July 20. Seattle Art Museum

The In Crowd
It's bloodlust at the country club as a bunch of hot, barely-legal psychopaths start letting the double-dates get out of hand. Opens Wed July 26. Meridian 16, Metro

Loser
American Pie's Jason Biggs continues on his quest to ruin his career before the compote on his penis dries. Opens Fri July 21. Metro

Not Love, Just Frenzy
On the evidence of this awful film, Spanish people are even more annoying about sex than the goddamn French. The film itself is a mess: a twentysomething erotic thriller, with all the cliched characterizations intact--a fiesty bartender/actress who packs a pistol, a shy little cutie whose only male contact is her happy fag roomie, and a confused introvert with a secret past. All three are galvanized by the arrival of a studly gigolo who may or may not be a murderer, and blah, blah, blah. But the absolute worst part of this lame film is the aggressive sense of "sexy" that comes hissing out at you, like a stupid person with a big penis. (Jamie Hook) Fri-Mon July 21-24 Varsity Calendar

Pokémon 2000
Does anyone else feel the urge to vomit when told that Pokémon is short for "Pocket Monster"? Eeewww. Ew ew ew. Opens Fri July 21. Metro

The Princess Bride
A special screening at which audience members overheard repeating the phrase "Inconceivable!" or "Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya..." will be assessed a $5 surcharge. Fri-Sat July 21-22. Egyptian

Shadow Hours
It's the terrible injustice of filmmaking: massive expenses, months or years of active hard work by dozens of professionals, and a rabidly dogmatic faith in the end product of a disjuncted process--for what? In five minutes, you know that Shadow Hours is a bad film, probably a terrible one. How awful that so much effort and will power doesn't mean anything to the couple sharing popcorn in a darkened theater who want only to believe the story they're being told. Virgilean Peter Weller takes a potential dead soul on a tour of Hell, which looks like Vancouver fronting as Seattle fronting as a major metropolis. Balthazar Getty (doing a dead-on Charlie Sheen) must leave the city or get eaten alive by it. Huh. Rent American Movie instead to watch the struggles of an inept filmmaker trying to get his story told--you get to see both the awkward process of creation and a fine film at the same time. All Shadow Hours gives you is the awkwardness. (Evan Sult) Opens Fri July 21 Varsity

*Street-Style Skate Docs
Poor skateboarding--commodified by advertising executives, its once-vibrant subculture was appropriated to sell extreme colas. It wasn't always this way. Screened tonight are Skatopia and Fruit of the Vine, two documentaries brimming with street cred in a sport set upon by Surge-guzzling posers. Fri July 21. 911 Media Arts

*SUMMER BLONDES
Grand Illusion's two-week celebration of the Blonde, including Mae West in She Done Him Wrong and Lana Turner in Johnny Eager. Opens Fri July 21. See review this issue. Grand Illusion

Thomas and the Magic Railroad
International superstar Thomas the Tank Engine goes up against surly Diesel 10 in this whimsical spectacular that boasts the spectacle of Alec Baldwin. Opens Wed July 26.

*We Served With Pride
A one-hour documentary honoring the experience of Chinese Americans who served in the military during World War II. Admission is free. Sat July 22. HUB Auditorium

What Lies Beneath
Fatal Attraction meets Ghost meets whatever that piece of crap Harrison Ford starred in opposite that lady from The English Patient last year was called. Recommended! Opens Fri July 21. Guild 45th

The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle
Rocky's a flying squirrel, and Bullwinkle is a dumb moose, so you'd think they wouldn't stand a chance against some evil bad guys, but in cartoons the good guys always win--that's just in cartoons! Meanwhile, The Fearless Leader makes a new TV show called RBTV (Really Bad Television) to try to make everybody in America become a zombie and vote for him for President, because in the real world, bad guys can win! (Sam Lachow) Aurora Cinema Grill, Factoria, Lewis & Clark, Meridian 16, Redmond Town Center

Amazon
An IMAX examination of the lush forests and exotic animals of the Amazon river basin. Omnidome

Barbarella
Roger Vadim's 1968 space adventure with Jane Fonda as the titular nymphette on a futuristic sexual odyssey. Supple thighs, kick-ass boots, and big hair. Grand Illusion

The Big Kahuna
Kahuna, starring Kevin Spacey and Danny DeVito as a couple of crappy salesmen, is a play adaptation, which means that the filmmakers face the eternal challenge: how to make three people talking for 90 minutes into an actual movie. They fail. (Sean Nelson) Uptown

Big Momma's House
In this weak comedy, Martin Lawrence plays the good guy; handsome Terrence Howard, plays the bad guy; and sexy Nia Long is the lover. When she suddenly disappears, the FBI stakes out her Georgia grandmother's home, but when her grandmother is suddenly called out of town on an emergency, Special Agent Martin Lawrence assumes her grandmother's role--her bed, her clothes, her big butt, her Southern drawl. (Charles Mudede) Lewis & Clark, Pacific Place 11

Blood Simple
A vulgar tale of small town thieves and liars, Blood Simple is gloriously corrupt and full of iconic small town caricatures, including a fantastically baroque M. Emmet Walsh in what is his best screen role to date. The plot twists keep developing, like an infection spreading to a lurid conclusion. (Jamie Hook) Egyptian

But I'm a Cheerleader
Shorts director Jamie Babbitt's feature debut is a disappointment--strenuous stuff that seldom rises above frail, second-rate camp. There should be a few more inspired laughs in its tale of Megan (Natasha Lyonne), a top-notch student cheerleader thought to be lesbian, who's sent to a camp where homosexuality is "cured." RuPaul and Cathy Moriarty are the grotesques who face her down, but it's the emergence of trust-fund tomboy Clea DuVall that gets her going. What's she going to be? Not much fun for the rest of us, that's what. (Ray Pride) Broadway Market

Butterfly
Spain, 1936; a boy and his schoolteacher; politics interfere. Acting as good as the best of Hollywood, costumes and sets as textured, cinematography as radiant--and a moral vision just as banal. Still, director Jose Luis Cuerda gets a fine performance from the little boy. You could enjoy this movie, as I did, without buying into its simple-mindedness. (Barley Blair) Metro

Chicken Run
Chicken Run is about chickens trying to escape. It is very funny and exciting; each chicken has a great sense of humor and is weird. It all starts when Rocky the Chicken comes blasting over the fence and everybody thinks he can fly. (Sam Lachow & Maggie Brown) Factoria, Lewis & Clark, Metro, Oak Tree, Pacific Place 11, Redmond Town Center

*Croupier
A bottle-blond exponent of God's lonely man takes a job in a private London casino and gets embroiled in some serious heist-related trouble. Mike Hodges, who directed the semi-obscure British new wave classic Get Carter, brings grace and severity to what could have just been neo-pulp. Instead, like the best pulp, Croupier becomes high lowbrow, thanks to a seasoned director's eye for detail, pneumatics, and sexy actors. (Sean Nelson) Broadway Market

Dinosaur
From the beginning of time, this has been the drama of the dinosaurs: They are oppressed by the mighty and terrifying Tyrannosaurus; they are always searching for water or a green paradise; and their big eggs are always eaten or crushed just moments before they hatch. (Charles Mudede) Lewis & Clark, Uptown

Disney's The Kid
If you are a middle-aged, wealthy, white man, it's probable that the horrible things you've done to others during your ruthless climb to the top have caused you to suffer from a painfully abscessed guilt complex. To end your suffering, it will be necessary to either hire a professional dominatrix to flay the hide right off your miserable ass or see Disney's The Kid, yet another switcheroo movie about an aging robber baron achieving redemption by literally massaging his inner child. (Tamara Paris) Aurora Cinema Grill, Factoria, Grand Alderwood, Meridian 16, Metro

Dolphins
Everyone knows that dolphins are the smartest animals on the planet; Dolphins proves they're the coolest as well. Pacific Science Center IMAX

East is East
The great Om Puri plays a fanatical father married to a British woman (Linda Basset). They own a small chip shop and a small house, which is packed with seven rebellious kids. With the exception of one boy, all the children are headed one way (toward total assimilation of British culture), and the father the other (preservation of Pakistani values); all that's left is a big showdown in the end. (Charles Mudede) Crest, Uptown

The Eruption of Mount St. Helens
The mountain blew up in 1980, and has been blowing up on film ever since. Omnidome

Everest
The first IMAX footage ever shot on top of the world. Pacific Science Center IMAX

Extreme
Don't try this at home, folks. An entire film bursting and soaring with EXTREME sports, EXTREME risks, and the ULTIMATE in EXTREME challenges. Pacific Science Center IMAX

Gladiator
War hero General Maximus (Russell Crowe) is stripped of his position by a scheming new Caesar. Escaping too late to save his family, Maximus falls into the hands of a slaver, and with the help of a former love and rough-but-likable gladiator pals, seeks his revenge by finding glory within the Coliseum. (Tom Spurgeon) Aurora Cinema Grill, Metro, Pacific Place 11, Redmond Town Center

Gone in 60 Seconds
To protect his little brother from an injurious limey, master car thief Nicolas Cage comes out of retirement, recruiting his old friends (Robert Duvall and Angelina Jolie among them) to help him steal 50 fancy cars in one night. (Sean Nelson) Grand Alderwood, Pacific Place 11

*High Fidelity
A romantic comedy for guys. John Cusack plays the cynically introspective Rob Gordon, the owner of a small record store who, for various reasons, has shit luck with women. He's a jerk, basically. (Kathleen Wilson) Metro

I'm the One That I Want
Cho isn't a particularly insightful comic, but she sure knows how to go after a laugh. What's funny here is gleefully, howlingly funny. Her personal emancipation, however, doesn't quite flow freely from the rest of her material; the show strains whenever she stops to hit a nail on the head. As a result, it's the scruffy, playful stuff that fares much better, including priceless takes on her mother and a fag hag navigating her pals through the Underground Railroad. (Steve Wiecking) Broadway Market

Jesus' Son
What Jesus' Son addresses at every moment, in every shot, is the great question of philosophy and literature: What makes existence both trivial and all-important? In the end, Jesus' Son beautifully captures the very twilight of life, that strange space humans occupy between the very small and the very large; between everything and nothing. (Charles Mudede) Harvard Exit

Me, Myself and Irene
Dildos, dog shit, the suffering of children and animals, physical disabilities, graphic violence, and Jim Carrey's rote performance beamed to the camera via satellite while he was taking a nap all conspire to make this a film that future generations will undoubtedly study as a sort of Rosetta stone of our cultural sicknesses. (Tamara Paris) Factoria, Grand Alderwood, Lewis & Clark, Meridian 16, Metro, Oak Tree

Michael Jordan to the MAX
See the greatest basketball player in history as nature intended: on a 3,500-square-foot movie screen! Seattle IMAX Dome Theatre

*Mission: Impossible 2
Criticizing the finer points of movies like Mission: Impossible 2--and yes, it does have finer points--is like picking gnat shit out of pepper. I loved this movie. I loved the profligate back flips in the fight choreography; I loved the preposterous motorcycle chase/joust. But most of all, I loved the giddy sense of hyperbole and spectacle that coarsed through the whole enterprise. (Sean Nelson) Aurora Cinema Grill, Grand Alderwood, Meridian 16, Southcenter

Mysteries of Egypt
Find out what the heck's going on over in Egypt, anyway. Omnidome

The Patriot
Mel Gibson stars as Benjamin Martin, a sweet single father of seven (of course his wife is tragically dead) who refuses to enter the brewing Revolutionary War because of his troubled past. But when son number two is gunned down by a nasty Brit, you know the Gib will soon be unpacking his deadly tomahawk in the name of "FREEEEEDOOOMMMM!" (Gillian G. Gaar) Factoria, Lewis & Clark, Meridian 16, Oak Tree, Redmond Town Center

The Perfect Storm
In its favor, The Perfect Storm has two superlatives: George Clooney and some fine, boiling seas. Unfortunately, the film itself--fraught with ham-fisted drama; painfully stupid dialogue; downright insulting characterizations; and some of the worst accent coaching ever--is awful. (Jamie Hook) Factoria, Grand Alderwood, Neptune, Oak Tree, Pacific Place 11

*Princess Mononoke
As anyone who's seen a Hayao Miyazaki film will attest, the story you follow is secondary to the sights you behold. The craggy reality of his twisting tree trunks capped with windblown tufts of leaves; the weighty presence of the rocks, whether rough or slicked smooth by water; the breathtaking vividness of light when the clouds part; the crouched expectancy of animals at rest--all of these are rendered as gorgeously as any animation I've ever seen, and in fact make a better plea for ecological sanity than the sometimes heavy-handed script. (Bruce Reid) Reopens Fri, July 21 Crest

*Road Trip
Road Trip takes the 15-minute road-trip sequence from Animal House and expands it to feature length. In this case, "University of Ithaca" college student Josh (Breckin Meyer) accidentally mails his long-distance girlfriend Tiffany a videotape of him having sex with another woman, forcing him and a trio of college buddies to drive 1,800 miles to recover it. (Eric Fredericksen) Uptown

Scary Movie
In addition to quick parodies of dozens of teen horror flicks, Scary Movie is largely a satire of the Scream films--which are already satires (go figure). Though it certainly has some knee-slappers, most of the infantile jokes simply go on way too long. Director Keenen Ivory Wayans may have wanted to repeat the success of earlier physical comedy/sight gag films like Airplane or Animal House, but he wound up with something as torturous as an overwrought skit from SNL. (Melody Moss) Factoria, Meridian 16, Oak Tree, Redmond Town Center, Varsity

Shaft
The way Shaft brutally beats up the drug-dealing teenager with the butt of his gun, the way he calmly guns down the Latino gang members or nearly kills the judge with his badge--it's a little too much, you will agree. (Charles Mudede) Grand Alderwood, Meridian 16, Oak Tree

Shanghai Noon
Even the presence of Jackie Chan and Owen Wilson can't save this revisionist Western action comedy from the musty odor of the second-rate. Wilson and his co-star are to be credited for occasionally rising above the material, but there are much better ways to spend a summer afternoon. (Tom Spurgeon) City Centre

Shower
Set in a wheezy old building in an overlooked corner of Beijing, the bathhouse serves as the social hub of an elderly fraternity, populated almost exclusively by melancholic old men who predictably complain about youth and argue amongst themselves. Though not a particularly insightful or even original film, Shower is nonetheless satisfying. Wonderfully cast, well scripted, and lovingly filmed, Shower is comfort food for the cinema--bland, but soothing. (Jamie Hook) Seven Gables

Small Time Crooks
Woody Allen's 2000 entry is one of his unambitious, hoping-only-to-amuse movies. Too bad it's unoriginal, not very amusing, and a near waste of some of this world's greatest comic talent: Tracey Ullman, Elaine May, and Jon Lovitz. (Eric Fredericksen) City Centre

Sunshine
Sunshine is a long movie. It is about a prosperous and voluptuous Hungarian Jewish family's experience of the turbulent 20th century. In a word, it' s an epic with lots of sex: I think we see Ralph Fiennes' ass three times total. That's once an hour! (Charles Mudede) Harvard Exit

T-Rex: Back to the Cretaceous
TThe neverending terror of Tyrannosaurus Rex is on IMAX! Wear your Dependscolor="#FF0000">*. Pacific Science Center IMAX

Titan AE
Titan AE (After Earth) was about--well, we didn't exactly see it because our editor didn't tell us the right theater to go to for the press screening. From the commercial, the animation looks really cool; some things even look real. (Sam & Maggie) Meridian 16

Trixie
Trixie might spin its wheels occasionally, and it definitely drags on past its welcome; nevertheless, when it works, it's remarkably fresh and invigorating. Emily Watson shines as an eponymous security guard hired to work the floor at a lakeside casino. Alan Rudolph keeps things breezy, filming the proceedings with enough intelligence to keep your interest even in the slower spots. (Bruce Reid) Crest

U-571
One of the most important turning points in World War II was the Allied capture of the German code machine, the Enigma. U-571 is an attempt to show us modern folks what this dramatic event must have been like. (Juan-Carlos Rodriguez) Uptown

*The Virgin Suicides
The most consistent element of The Virgin Suicides is a steady stream of images that echo the feminine-hygiene commercials of the 1970s. If the film has a message, it seems to be that a mythologized purity of youth can't survive into adulthood. (Monica Drake) Crest

X-Men
X-Men is a modern comic book played completely straight. While this may be great news for comic book fans, it's not so great for everyone else for whom the experience of watching X-Men will be like seeing a less-expensive Matrix Lite with inexplicably odd plot quirks. (Tom Spurgeon) Cinerama, Factoria, Metro, Northgate, Pacific Place 11, Redmond Town Center