COMING SOON

Dude, Where's My Car?, The Emperor's New Groove, Family Man, Into the Arms of Strangers, It's A Wonderful Life, Quills, What Women Want

Blackboard Jungle
Stuffed to the gills with the shocked piety and earnest do-gooderism of Hollywood liberalism, 1950s style, Blackboard Jungle isn't so much sympathetic with the plight of its violent teen protagonists as appalled at how they're wasting their lives. Still, this is an opinion formed from the comfortable vantage point of hindsight, and there's no denying the admirable ruckus director Richard Brooks stirred up by portraying school kids as bereft of guidance and drifting into fights, drugs, and sexual activity. Playing Bill Haley over the opening credits was a deliberate provocation in 1955; and if the film is still best remembered for introducing rock and roll to the movies it also benefits from a strong leading performance by Glenn Ford and Sidney Poitier's galvanizing presence as the most reachable (read: saveable) of the kids. (Bruce Reid) Wed only. JBL Theater at EMP

Bootmen
Reviewed this issue. Tap dancing assumes its rightful place in the pantheon of movie musicals in this new work from the creator of Tap Dogs. Opens Fri. Broadway Market

The Burglar
Jayne Mansfield stars in this 1957 noir concerning a couple on the lam following their robbery of a bogus spiritualist. Thurs only. Seattle Art Museum

Catfish in Black Bean Sauce
Reviewed this issue. A film about the world of Vietnamese immigrants in L.A., which our critic claims is as delicious as its title. Opens Fri. Broadway Market

Chuck Jones' Holiday Animation
The Spokane-born Chuck Jones was on hand a few years back for Scarecrow Video's legendary Festival of Animation. He will not attend this tribute, though his daughter will. Some of the cartoons scheduled for presentation include "What's Opera, Doc?," "Duck Dodgers in the 24 1/2 Century," and the stunning "One Froggy Evening." Also showing: Jones' superior original cartoon version of "How the Grinch Stole Christmas." By the way, the event is free! Sat only. Seattle Art Museum

Disco Dolls in 3-D
Chick Weed owns the Disco Doll, a front for a bordello, and inspector Creatisfealer is closing in. Meanwhile, he's been having trouble "performing" with his girlfriend Jennifer, so he seeks medical help from Swiss psychiatrist Dr. Aungeblausen. Not just porn, but porn with a plot--and in 3-D! Fri-Sat only. Egyptian

Dungeons and Dragons
Straight world: Please, please just turn away. Geeks like me: If you know the difference between a drow and an orc, it's too late for you anyway. It doesn't matter that this movie is wretchedly incomprehensible, or that it was made at least 15 years too late; the promise of seeing mages and Beholders and the Thieves' Guild and a deadly labyrinth is just too tempting, if only so we can go and harrumph our way through the whole thing. And let's finally face the facts, shall we? We're geeks by nature, we belong to this stuff; Dungeons and Dragons is really only as embarrassing and unbearable and uncool as we are. (Evan Sult) Opens Fri. Varsity

*Fanny and Alexander
Bergman's greatest achievement is also one of the most life-affirming movies ever made. The titular children, a brother and sister, are the battleground for a war of spiritual ambitions when their widowed mother marries a stern Lutheran priest. But this central battle is only one small facet of this diamond. The Patriarch's sexual abandon; the failed uncle's fabulous fart tricks; the matriarch's elegiac patience and complex grasp of the dynamics of family--all of these depictions burn as brightly, with the result that the film feels effortlessly universal, yet never less than intimate. Joyous, pure, and bursting with faith, the final, sunlit brunch is directly responsible for the birth of my daughter. (She was an accident, after all). (Jamie Hook) One week only starting Fri. Grand Illusion

*A Hard Day's Night
Reviewed this issue. Scream your way through this film, re-released in a gorgeous new print. One week only starting Fri. Varsity Calendar

Marat/Sade
Peter Weiss' famous play is about as convoluted as they come. The story--the Marquis de Sade directs the inmates of the Charenton asylum in the production of a play about French revolutionary martyr Jean-Paul Marat--is confusing enough. Weiss' execution of this story--which includes numerous political asides culled from de Sade's political texts, as well as breaks within the performance as commanded by the asylum's warden--is downright mind-numbing. At least, it was in the theatre. I've not seen the film in question, though Peter Brooks' 1964 adaptation of the play--of which this film is a record--was the toast of London town, for what its worth. Perhaps you need to be a history buff; at any rate, I prefer the Death of Marat painting by Jacques-Louis David. (Jamie Hook) Fri-Sun only. Consolidated Works

*MILESTONE FILMS RETROSPECTIVE
Reviewed this issue. One of the nation's best specialty film distributors celebrates 10 years of great discoveries. One week only starting Fri. Egyptian

*One Day in the Life of Andrei Arsenovich
See Stranger Suggests. The late, great Andrei Tarkovsky is the subject of the cinematic essay by the not-yet-late-but-still-great Chris Marker. Thurs only. Little Theatre

Proof of Life
Russell Crowe is an expert on the fine art of dealing with hubby-'napping terrorists in this new work, presumably intended to worry the American public. Opens Fri. Grand Alderwood, Meridian 16, Neptune, Oak Tree, Redmond Town Center

Robot Monster
Second in the three-part "Only a Handful Survived" late-night film series at the Grand Illusion, The Robot Monster is perhaps the finest example to date of the sublime nature of true American schlock. The last six humans on earth are hunted by an alien race from the moon, embodied by an actor in a gorilla suit with a diving helmet added for effect. The lame, hard-boiled dialogue and generally crappy acting are an asset; the creakiness of the whole contraption is more charming than Cary Grant. Truly a remarkable work, hilarious and as stupid as a cow, this film is a definitive icon of "high" American art (hint hint). (Jamie Hook) Fri-Sat only. Grand Illusion

*The Sacrifice
Andrei Tarkovsky's final masterpiece is one of the greatest works of the cinema, period. Erland Josephson is a retired actor whose birthday proceedings are interrupted by the outbreak of nuclear war. Offering himself to God, he embarks on an obscure but supremely moving odyssey of faith and redemption that must stand as the triumphant summary to Tarkovsky's own shockingly articulate spirituality as defined in his films. One of the most visually sumptuous films ever made, The Sacrifice was a collaboration of sorts between Tarkovsky and Bergman: Tarkovsky used Bergman's stock company, including actors, designers, and genius cinematographer Sven Nykvist, to realize his vision. Yet, in the end, it is the purity of the great Russian director's spiritual vision that makes this film so profound. (Jamie Hook) Fri-Sun only. Little Theatre

Screenwriter's Salon: Our Favorite Scenes
A panel discussion of film critics' favorite movie moments, exploring what makes a scene truly great. Scheduled to attend are The Stranger's own Bruce Reid, Film Comment's Robert Horton and Kathleen Murphy, Anne Rosselini of Atomfilms, and the screenwriter of Mrs. Parker and the Vicious Circle. Mon only. Market Theatre

The Vertical Limit
Reviewed this issue. The Karakoram Range replaces the jungle gym in this cross between an action film and a child's recess fantasy. Opens Fri. Metro

102 Dalmatians
102 Dalmatians was really funny but pretty boring, because it seemed really long. For example, the movie wasn't very exciting because almost half of it was dating and talking about stupid stuff. Glenn Close was very good as Cruella. Most of the actors besides Glenn Close were corny, because everything they said you knew they were going to say, and they said it in a fake way. In this movie it seemed like there was only about 50 dogs, even though the name of the movie is 102 Dalmatians. All you saw were about 20 dogs escaping up the stairs, a few more dogs nursing, and a couple dogs helping the 20 dogs escape. We would have liked it better if we saw more dogs in the movie. (Sam Lachow & Maggie Brown) Majestic Bay, Metro, Northgate, Pacific Place 11, Redmond Town Center

The 6th Day
Ahh, the glory of the movie star! In The 6th Day, Arnold Schwarzenegger stars as a helicopter pilot who is mistakenly cloned, thus becoming a double. Of course, a dastardly corporation is behind it all, and Schwarzenegger must topple it single (or, in this case, double)-handedly. But just in case you are turned off by the thought of Schwarzenegger and his double, be assured that the true star of The 6th Day is Vancouver, B.C.'s fantastic new Central Library, designed by the great Moshe Safdie. Cast as the villain's corporate headquarters, this stunning building upstages everyone, especially in the action scenes. Let's hope Rem Koolhaas' new Seattle Public Library can put us on the action movie map as gracefully! (Jamie Hook) Aurora Cinema Grill, Factoria, Grand Alderwood, Pacific Place 11

Almost Famous
The truth of the matter is that this movie is nothing more and nothing less than a light and entertaining crowd-pleaser. Which is fine. Good, even. It's just that for a rock 'n' roll tour film set in 1973, the content comes across as so... clean--like R-rated content in a PG-13 package. (Andy Spletzer) Uptown

*Bedazzled
Stumbling across Bedazzled is like finding a bucket full of moonshine in the woods. It's not that the film is great, but it's awfully nice to meander into something that is simply, confidently good. Plus, I never knew that Brendan Fraser was HILARIOUS! His goofy, unrestrained performance as a schmuck making Faustian deals with the devil is a joy to behold--humble, manic, tidy, and sloppy all at once. (Jamie Hook) Uptown

*Best In Show
Christopher Guest's latest with Eugene Levy follows several dog owners on their quest for the blue ribbon at the 2000 Mayflower Kennel Club Dog Show. A well-executed, ridiculous little film lovingly mining ridiculous little people's ridiculous little lives. (Jason Pagano) Broadway Market, Grand Alderwood, Redmond Town Center, Seven Gables

*Billy Elliot
As the BBC put it, "You are heartless if you don't love every minute of this film"--and I'm not heartless. Thirty minutes into it, I gave in; there was no way I could hate it. I must make a confession: I almost cried during this film--yes, it's that touching. (Charles Mudede) Guild 45th, Harvard Exit

Bounce
Even fans of Don Roos' first film, The Opposite of Sex, will likely find Bounce to be bad. This being a Miramax production, it stars Gwyneth Paltrow and Ben Affleck. He's a successful ad exec with an empty life; she's a happy housewife married to a TV writer/failed playwright. In a Chicago airport, Ben gives the bad writer his ticket and then the plane crashes. A year or so later, he tries to buy off his guilt by giving the widow, now a real estate agent, a sale that she's not qualified to make. They start dating. Everybody knows that when she finds out he's a creepy death-stalker she'll rightfully dump him. Everybody, that is, but her best friend, her kids, and writer-director Don Roos. This movie is very wrong on many levels. (Andy Spletzer) Aurora Cinema Grill, Factoria, Majestic Bay, Metro, Pacific Place 11, Redmond Town Center

*Charlie's Angels
Completely brainless, God bless its heart. Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz, and Lucy Liu kick, chop, giggle, and dance their way through some sort of story involving technical thievery or... something. It doesn't really make sense, but then again, it doesn't really matter because director McG has created a world of lunacy where people levitate with relative ease, and there is absolutely no explanation for it. Hot chicks kick ass and fly, and either you accept it and have fun, or you don't. (Bradley Steinbacher) Factoria, Lewis & Clark, Meridian 16, Metro, Oak Tree, Redmond Town Center

Dancer in the Dark
Dancer in the Dark is a wonderful film in theory. In exposition, however, it suffers gravely from director Lars von Trier's ingrained contrarian aesthetic and growing avant-garde laziness. When the film is not wantonly sadistic, it is simply sloppy in a poorly thought-out way. While von Trier maintains his unique facility for the direction of small, crying women, his other tricks seem woefully inadequate for pulling off the feat he sets out to accomplish. (Jamie Hook) Varsity

How the Grinch Stole Christmas
The Grinch is much different than the old cartoon. In this movie, the Grinch has a huge house with a telephone, a pulley, and trap doors. In the old cartoon he doesn't have any of that stuff. If you watch this you will find out where the Grinch came from, and why he hates Christmas. Like always, Jim Carrey is FABULOUS! He is sooo funny--you couldn't find a better actor to play the part. On the other hand, the actor who played Cindy Lou Who was not very good--she was pretty corny. The Grinch was funny but not as good as I thought it would be. (Sam Lachow, 10 years old) Factoria, Lewis & Clark, Majestic Bay, Meridian 16, Metro, Oak Tree, Redmond Town Center

The Legend of Bagger Vance
Bagger Vance opens with Jack Lemmon having a heart attack on a golf course, which sets the tone for the whole movie. Lying in the rough, Lemmon starts to narrate a story about how, when he was 10 years old, he and a mystical caddy named Bagger Vance (Will Smith) helped keep local golfer Rannulph Junuh (Matt Damon) from embarrassing himself in an exhibition match against the two greatest golfers in America. You see, Junuh "lost his swing" when he saw his buddies die in WWII, and he needed the love of a pretty woman (Charlize Theron), the faith of a child, and some Zen-like advice from a mystical caddy to get it back. (Andy Spletzer) Grand Alderwood, Lewis & Clark, Pacific Place 11

*Legend of the Drunken Master
Jackie Chan's best film is his 1979 breakout Drunken Master. This sequel from 1994 captures much of the high energy and goofy humor of that classic, and adds a greatly expanded budget that allows for some impressive sets, which the actors leap about and smash up to their hearts' content. The fight scenes are remarkable, but as always it's the throwaway bits that really blow your mind. Check out Chan's nimble leap up a wall and through an open transom; when you've picked your jaw up off the floor, remind yourself that's what movies are all about. (Bruce Reid) City Centre

Little Nicky
Adam Sandler has always been smart enough to cloud his aggressive gross-out humor (and nasty racism and homophobia) in a ragged, slapdash improvisatory structure that makes his films almost charming. The best moments in Little Nicky, a clunking, amateurish, but occasionally quite funny succession of gags about Satan's son hunting for his evil older brothers on the loose in New York come from such odd cameos as Jon Lovitz, Regis Philbin, John and Reese Witherspoon (no relation to the best of my knowledge), and that "nice, sweet man" Henry Winkler, who all obviously dropped in for a day and riffed on their lines to their heart's content. Extra credit, too, for the deadpan newscaster who finds nothing especially amiss when "what appears to be a section of Hell" manifests itself in Central Park. (Bruce Reid) Grand Alderwood, Pacific Place 11

Meet the Parents
Ben Stiller plays Greg, a male nurse living in an unnamed metropolis, about to pop the question to Pam, his kindergarten-teacher girlfriend. But he realizes in the nick of time that he must first ask her father (played with vicious delicacy by Robert De Niro) for permission. Happily, a trip home to attend her sister's wedding presents the perfect opportunity. But wait! Complications invariably ensue, and each new catastrophic development drives a wedge ever deeper twixt Greg and his beloved. (Tamara Paris) Grand Alderwood, Metro, Oak Tree, Pacific Place 11

Men of Honor
"History is made by those who break rules." That's the tagline for Men of Honor, which takes place when the American armed services were being racially integrated. Cuba Gooding Jr. portrays Carl Brashear, the first black underwater salvage expert in the Navy. Robert De Niro gives a bland performance as the master chief diver (love those military ranks!) who first tries to break Gooding, and then, when Gooding has disobeyed several of his orders, embraces his cause. Hal Holbrook plays a completely gratuitous role as a crazy old base commander whose only function is to add another layer of disobedience, so that when De Niro changes to Gooding's side, they can both defy Holbrook. It's bad, but it's not especially bad. (Barley Blair) Factoria, Grand Alderwood, Metro, Oak Tree, Pacific Place 11

*Non-Stop
Take three losers--a would-be bank robber, a convenience store clerk with rock 'n' roll aspirations, and an incompetent bodyguard. Involve them in a plot that also includes a missing gun, a toy gun, big knives, short swords, gangster groups, a car full of cops, and a gauze mask. Satirize all the movies that all of these movie characters wish they were in. That's the task that Sabu set for himself when he wrote and directed Non-Stop. It takes six seconds--seven, tops--to realize that you're in the hands of a competent filmmaker. So stop reading right now and just go see it. (Barley Blair) Uptown

Pay It Forward
After having been instructed by his social studies teacher to make the world a more benevolent place, Haley Joel Osment starts at the bottom, where the bums live amid burning oil cans, of course. About five minutes into his effort, Osment thinks he's failed and that the world is, in fact, shit. It's a performance that'll probably earn somebody an Oscar, but it just made me feel like kicking a kid in the teeth. (Kathleen Wilson) Aurora Cinema Grill, Pacific Place 11, Redmond Town Center

*Pizza & Movies
Join the wacky crew over at Second Ave Pizza in Belltown for their semi-regular movie "festivals"--where all things nostalgic, kitschy, and most of all fun, rule the screen (plus it's good eatin'). This week: This is Spinal Tap, Better Off Dead, and an Atom Films festival of shorts. Second Avenue Pizza

Red Planet
In American cinema, the worse the director, the more strangely symbolic the film becomes. Red Planet is a perfect example. For instance: the egg/sperm imagery throughout the film (this is a film about populating a barren wasteland, after all) is over the top. There is even a spaceship that blastulates just before hitting the surface of Mars--much as a zygote does before becoming embedded in the uterine wall. Plus, there is a great scene where sperm, represented by little bugs, which, in turn, represent God, attack Tom Sizemore and then explode. Strange things! (Jamie Hook) Meridian 16

Remember the Titans
Remember the Titans is set in the early '70s and based on real life, real people, the real America. It's a "problem film"--a movie about a black man (a football coach, in this case) who has to win the trust and love of angry, white racists. Incredible as this may sound, the movie is actually fascinating--not because it's well done or acted (nothing stands out in that regard), but because it has the manic pace of The Rock coupled with the content of Do the Right Thing. Now how in the world can you top that? (Charles Mudede) City Centre, Southcenter

Requiem For a Dream
In Requiem for a Dream (based on the Hubert Selby Jr. novel of the same name, about the downward spiral of a trio of Brooklyn junkies), Darren Aronofsky opts to assault us with self-righteous imagery masquerading as some sort of daring bohemian technique. It is a conceit that manages to obliterate the few promising moments in the film. In the end, Requiem for a Dream comes off as so much high-school posturing: puerile; craven; and, in hindsight, embarrassingly tacky. (Jamie Hook) Broadway Market

Rugrats in Paris: The Movie
This is the season when the entertainment industry presents its most enticing new kiddy-crack. Why waste time dabbling in the waters of those fancy foreigners with their unintelligible offerings (Teletubbies, Pokemon, etc.) or those epileptic fit-inducing upstarts who employ every cheap trick involving violence, sex, and subliminal messaging (everything on Fox Kids, for example). Your child does not need variety--your child needs success! And you know full well that the Rugrats have been, are, and for some time to come will be the bearers of the formula for success. Sing when you're winning my friends, sing when you're winning. (Kudzai Mudede) Factoria, Grand Alderwood, Lewis & Clark, Meridian 16, Metro, Oak Tree

Unbreakable
Bruce Willis sleepily stars as a mild-mannered security guard, who walks away without a scratch as the sole survivor of a two-train pileup. Soon after, he is approached by Samuel L. Jackson, a comic-book collector who's become convinced that Willis is a charmed person, immune to harm, perhaps gifted with psychic powers. Willis portrays Dunne, whose grudging awareness that he is different from the rest of us is told with as little humor or even enjoyment as possible. Thus introducing a whole new genre: the glum, glacially slow, risibly pretentious superhero flick. (Bruce Reid) Factoria, Grand Alderwood, Lewis & Clark, Meridian 16, Metro, Oak Tree

What's Cooking?
What's Cooking frames four ethnically diverse families who face quite modern dilemmas on this most obese of our national holidays, Thanksgiving. Will machismo prevail or get its ass kicked when Elizabeth's new lover and her separated husband both show up? Will the Seelings' dinner-party guests find out that the Seelings' daughter's housemate is really her lesbian lover? Of course they will! Ultimately, the movie functions as a feature-length soap opera, embarrassing everyone involved under the auspices of a greater good. (Suzy Lafferty) Metro

*You Can Count on Me
As a teenager, alone in my teenager room in America, my greatest longing was for a state of sadness. My craving was so strong it became clear that "sadness" was the very root of desire for me. Now with my thoughts gathered in full-blown adulthood, I realize that all I wanted in my quest for "sadness" was to be an adult. In Kenneth Lonergan's You Can Count on Me, "adult" and "sadness" and "American" become a knot of synonyms as the story focuses on the pure inability a brother and sister have with one another now that they're adults. It is as though being an adult, and a member of a grownup American family, is the path of loneliness and sadness. Without any trendy embitterment, the sad path of the story is inspired, beautiful, and desirable. And the case is made for loneliness as the Great American Pursuit. (Paula Gilovich) Guild 45th, Harvard Exit