We all know the first rule about watching a movie based on a book: Don't expect the movie to resemble the book. But, you know what? Fuck that. Certain themes are of essence to a story. If, say, the on-screen hobbits in The Lord of the Rings were sullen, despondent nomads of the desert, you'd punch Peter Jackson in the throat. Likewise, if you read Maurice Sendak's Where the Wild Things Are, you'd rightly expect the movie's leading beasts to be, well, wild creatures having some pretty wild times.

Don't expect that.

Sendak's 1963 illustrated kids' book is a scant nine sentences long. So there's brilliance by screenwriter Dave Eggers in spinning that thin fiber into a feature-length sweater. The book concerns Max, a tyrannical shit of a kid, charging around the house in a wolf suit until his mother imprisons him in his bedroom without dinner. A forest grows around Max and he winds up [spoiler alert —Eds.] where the Wild Things are. They "roared their terrible roars and gnashed their terrible teeth," Sendak writes, but Max tames the Wild Things "by staring into their yellow eyes without blinking once." They crown him king, and all embark on a wild rumpus under the moon. From there, any adventure is possible.

But while the original tale is anchored in a fantastic adventure—and the implication of a world of wildness beyond imagination, where anger and confidence reign—the screen quickly shatters your dreams. Rather than speaking in grumbles and roars, the Wild Things speak in prime-time cartoon voices, with a familiar sitcommy lilt.

And rather than fearless yet sociable beasts, the Wild Things take on the characteristics of Max's emotions and fractured family: an overworked single mom, an awkward boy, and a teenage sister outgrowing her kid brother's antics. The beasts still have terrible teeth and claws—and the animapuppemagic of the Things is utterly convincing—but they are jealous, petty, insecure, passive-aggressive things. Not wild things.

In short: You go in expecting The Neverending Story, but you end up with Dr. Phil. There are no luck dragons; there are only difficult family times.

Some credit is due for this counterintuitive take—because of course you're expecting them to be so wiiiiiild—but I've had it with counterintuitive. Moreover, a drama based on metaphors for family tension falls flat in a kids' movie. Themes of trust and betrayal are nuanced adult concepts, but they get dumbed down for the youthful audience who will fill the theater seats. It's not a betrayal of Sendak, either. He reportedly reached out for director Spike Jonze, of Being John Malkovich fame.

But the pair colluded on a simplistic story. The plot is tugged not by a menace, a mission, or a challenge, but instead Max and the Wild Things meandering through their struggle to avoid loneliness. To find a sense of place.

(A quick aside: People Having a Hard Time in Life is the dullest of all movie plots, which includes but is not limited to Having a Hard Time with Friends, Having a Hard Time with a Job, Having a Hard Time with a Lover, Having a Hard Time with Oneself, and Having a Hard Time with Your Family. Covering characters in fur and talons doesn't substantially change this hackneyed cinematic staple.)

None of this is to say that Where the Wild Things Are is anything short of a visual triumph. The giant eagle that walks upright—and has a detachable wing—and the horned beast with flower-power hair and feathered legs move exactly the way you'd imagine a 600-pound creature would move. And the fort they share makes you pine to build a tree house the size of an ark. There are, of course, a handful of wild moments and funny quips ("You're the first king we haven't eaten").

But what could have been an epic— using the framework that inspired a fantastic place—instead became Max living out the ultimate manifestation of insecurity. At one point they actually fight over which guests are invited over to the house. It's another mundane story of people having a hard time in life. And lots of movies dwell on hardship. Our stories of shared fantasy are few and far between, and this fantasy was squandered.