From the Oct 16 – Oct 22, 2003 issue

Columns

Home Wrecker Hell

When my husband told you "no thanks," that's what he meant. No thanks to the lunch invitations, "chance" meetings, coy e-mails, and sexy messages. But then he started to hide from me how flattered and turned on he was by your attentions. Flirting is fun and harmless, but what you've done is despicable! Once the final line was crossed, your name was dropped from his vocabulary, and that's when I smelled the danger. You almost ruined my marriage, you desperately aging slag! You morally bankrupt slut! We were a hair away from divorce, and while you were calling him and making asinine "oops-my-skirt-slipped" plays, I was wrestling with the threat of losing the house we were buying and having my son grow up without his dad--all because YOU had your sights set on someone who inconveniently already had a wife. I'll never forgive him and I will never forget you. I hope you enjoy life as a lonely spinster with a condo and a 9-to-5 job at the bank followed by happy hours with your doltish yuppie friends. You'll never find love, because I'll be chanting Santeria over your ass from now until forever.

--Anonymous