Our New Year's kiss lasted three seconds. What kind of passion is that? You walked away and turned your back on your husband after a three-second kiss. What happened? Last year's kiss was three minutes. By the way, I'm in love with your sister and she knows it. She stared at me while she was still open-eyed kissing her husband while the ball dropped. Because she lusts after me. It's true. We've spoken about it. She has self-control, though, and wouldn't do that to you. I would cave in an instant, though. That's right—my sister-in-law wants me because I'm kinky and her husband is vanilla. And smaller. It's partially your fault, my wife. All of your overly detailed stories of our romance and sex life stoked her passion for me. At least that's what your sister tells me. I love you, I just want a passionate kiss from someone who looks at me the way she does.

—Anonymous