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Steven Weissman
You thought you were really crafty, didn't you? I understand you were upset that I finally left your pathetic ass, but you deserved it. After putting up with your chronic whining for seven months, I don't feel bad about it at all. I shouldn't be surprised that your lame attempt to avenge yourself was to delete all my music off my computer and replace it with a single Chumbawamba CD. First off, fuck you for being a childish dick (I mean that figuratively and literally). My new playlist you so graciously provided is a warm reminder of how much better I feel now that your decrepit little cock is nowhere near me anymore.
Submit your unsigned confession or accusation
here.
Please remember to change the names of the innocent and guilty. One submission will be published in the paper and online every week.
1
Why do I get the feeling that your music collection sucked anyhow?
If it's worth keeping, it's worth backing up.
If it's worth keeping, it's worth backing up.
2
LOL why do women who dump men always knock their cocks after? You rode it for a while, couldnt have been that bad fool!
5
@2 and 4, not such a great point because women aren't usually in a relationship for the penis and the penis only.
This exact point was brought up in the movie "Network" when Max asks "Why is it that a woman always thinks that the most savage thing she can say to a man is to impugn his cocksmanship?"
I'm not a man, but I'm pretty sure that most of them, and to be sure all the interesting ones, are over whatever size dick they have. As to why they do it, it might be part projection though, because most women would be hurt if you told them their pussy made you want to throw-up, and the sex was so bad that you had think about porn just to get it up for them.
This exact point was brought up in the movie "Network" when Max asks "Why is it that a woman always thinks that the most savage thing she can say to a man is to impugn his cocksmanship?"
I'm not a man, but I'm pretty sure that most of them, and to be sure all the interesting ones, are over whatever size dick they have. As to why they do it, it might be part projection though, because most women would be hurt if you told them their pussy made you want to throw-up, and the sex was so bad that you had think about porn just to get it up for them.
6
@2 because you think you like the guy and you put up with bad sex for the other parts of the relationship. but all that time. just faking it.
7
Twould be nice if we could go back to a few of those I anonymous' that I'm pretty sure the stranger staff submitted... they may have been contrived, but at least not some kind of drivel meant to incite self-righteous indignation from a particular sex.. srsly, consider something written by someone not younger than 20 and that's actually interesting, plz.
8
All the interesting ones certainly, but most? You don't get out much, do you?
I'm not a man, but I'm pretty sure that most of them, and to be sure all the interesting ones, are over whatever size dick they have.
All the interesting ones certainly, but most? You don't get out much, do you?
9
that's what happens when you date fat chicks..they bitch up for awhile..then finally "get enough" and then try the only thing they know how--insult the dick. It was good enough for the rest of the time...so stop the sour grapes...and go to the gym fatty.
10
@keshmeshi, all of my male friends are interesting, so I have a skewed sample base to be sure, but I have a hard time believing that by middle age, men, who by that point have had a fair amount of sex, are still comparing their penises. The world is not made up young men, and comparing and obsessing over penises is a sport of youths.
To be fair once you lose your youth, you might as well not exist to the advertising/entertainment/media world.
To be fair once you lose your youth, you might as well not exist to the advertising/entertainment/media world.
11
Making fun of a guy's dick is so boring. Think of something more interesting to say about why you don't like him. If that's the best you can come up with, you aren't smart enough to deserve any size dick stuffed into you.
13
So let's recap. If am I, Anonymous is interesting, it must have been submitted by Stranger staffers; and if it's boring then the person deserved what they got and are probably fat. Alright, I can dig it!
14
I don't know about anyone deserving anything, but I think as soon as you feel the letter from the gal complaining about her b/f's pee-pee after he deleted her mp3's deserves a public forum.. .perhaps the bar you're using to gauge what letters you publish should be raised.
15
Assholes who ride bikes in cities deserve to get run down. They don't obey the law, they cork intersections, they risk other's needlessly with a ridiculous sense of 'entitlement' because they're being 'envirokosher'.
Fuck 'em. Run them all down and leave their corpses for the crows.
Fuck 'em. Run them all down and leave their corpses for the crows.
16
"Fuck 'em. Run them all down and leave their corpses for the crows."
Off topic, a little?
Also, you're a fucking dirtbag. Move back to Kent, and you can have lots of big streets to drive on and lots of fucking Burger King to stuff in your face hole.
Eat a bag of dicks, idiot.
Off topic, a little?
Also, you're a fucking dirtbag. Move back to Kent, and you can have lots of big streets to drive on and lots of fucking Burger King to stuff in your face hole.
Eat a bag of dicks, idiot.
18
This I Anon is seriously a bore. Probably the most childish breakup vengeance that happened to me was a guy stealing my furniture out of a storage space we shared and selling it after we broke up. That's a loss you might grieve over for a little bit, but still be glad to cut the ties. But seriously... if your music wasn't total crap you'd have backed it up so I don't think your ex was the only whiner in this doomed duo. If you had such a huge (or lack of hugeness) problem with his dick, you really should not have been sleeping in his bed and fucking him for the last 7 months, growing resentful over his inability to fuck you satisfactorily, then throw it out like "oh, by the way." Move on and be glad you weren't knocked up, bankrupted or diseased.
20
@2 You're not wrong about some women. I had a friend who would gush about how big her current boyfriend's dick was, until they broke up. Then she would rant about how small his dick was. I heard this sequence three times before we lost touch and it never failed to amuse me.
21
@15 Right on! I love how the cyclists demand to be respected on the roadways and then casually ride through intersectiohs against the light.
25
Who'd want to date someone who was so stupid she let her ex near her computer in the first place? Second, why the fuck didn't she back her files up? And third, I've had women bitch about how big the cock they were currently fucking happened to be.
One day women like this little twat will finally understand it really isn't about the size, it's about not being stupid and/or letting stupid put it in you.
But hey, Stupid is as Stupid does.
One day women like this little twat will finally understand it really isn't about the size, it's about not being stupid and/or letting stupid put it in you.
But hey, Stupid is as Stupid does.
29
How do we know it's a girl? It could be a guy thatt just broke up with his boyfriend... that's what I thought, anyway.
30
This anonymous, is obviously seeking revenge and got it, he reads this column I'm sure. Not only that , but people are now talking openly about his cock. A few readers may even know him do to the sitch, cuz poeple love to talk. Now they wonder about his cock size which I find unimportant, unless he doesn't know how to use the tool. Koodoes to the writer.You win!
31
#9 is a perfect example of what men do to women that is the equivalent of women taunting cock size...calls them fat. just shut up and move to la.
32
@ 21 - I'm sure you would always wait for the light if you rode a bike, just like you always wait for the light when walking across the street, right? You never, ever jay-walk, right? Don't be mad because other people are bettering themselves and their environment. If everyone rode a bike, it would eliminate a huge percentage of our counties problems. Obesity and oil dependacy for starters. You must have some other stress related driving issues and see cyclists as an easy target for venting. Way to go! You really are an asset to your community!
33
@ 21 - I'm sure you would always wait for the light if you rode a bike, just like you always wait for the light when walking across the street, right? You never, ever jay-walk, right? Don't be mad because other people are bettering themselves and their environment. If everyone rode a bike, it would eliminate a huge percentage of our counties problems. Obesity and oil dependacy for starters. You must have some other stress related driving issues and see cyclists as an easy target for venting. Way to go! You really are an asset to your community!
34
Likely female writer:
"Words: 116
(NOTE: The genie works best on texts of more than 500 words.)
Female Score: 290
Male Score: 62
The Gender Genie thinks the author of this passage is: female!"
Can't quite make the biking-commuter comments -to I anon - connection, other than both have questionably healthy groins...
@18: seriously, this is weakness. Worst breakup I saw was the girl that gave away / threw out her cheating guy's home electronics and fancy clothes to people on the street in an angry fit. I have a bit of a crush on her, I swear.
"Words: 116
(NOTE: The genie works best on texts of more than 500 words.)
Female Score: 290
Male Score: 62
The Gender Genie thinks the author of this passage is: female!"
Can't quite make the biking-commuter comments -to I anon - connection, other than both have questionably healthy groins...
@18: seriously, this is weakness. Worst breakup I saw was the girl that gave away / threw out her cheating guy's home electronics and fancy clothes to people on the street in an angry fit. I have a bit of a crush on her, I swear.
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