I, Anonymous

Parental Guidance Not Suggested

I, Anonymous


You felt entitled enough to let me know that "I was endangering my child's life" by crossing a quiet side street next to QFC when it wasn't a walk sign (the sign is tilted just enough so you can't actually see it anyway, I've always just gone when it's safe). I informed you that I felt like I waited until it was safe and that I couldn't see the sign anyway, to which you responded, "They should take that child away from you." If crossing the street when it's not a walk sign is a reason to take a child from someone, I'd guess about 95 percent of parents would have their parenthood revoked. I've seen 5-year-olds still sucking on binkies, car seats in the front seat of cars with the windows rolled up while the mom is smoking, and worse. But you know what? I didn't say a damn word, because those aren't my children. You probably won't even read this—you seem like the kind of guy who's suffocating inside the Seattle Times' butthole rather than reading The Stranger—but I hope karma does what I had to hold myself back from doing and slaps you in the face.


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Comments (23) RSS

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If IA was crossing against the light she should just STFU already. The entitlement of people in this town. But I'm special!
Posted by allaboutme on October 2, 2013 at 10:32 AM · Report this
JF 2
Sweet Seattle Times buuuuuuuuuuuurn!
Posted by JF on October 2, 2013 at 11:50 AM · Report this
TheMisanthrope 3
Actually, it seems like one of The Stranger's government control-happy readers.
Posted by TheMisanthrope on October 2, 2013 at 12:18 PM · Report this
debug 4
Classic "I didn't know what to say at the time" story. Should have gone with "Jerk Store".
Posted by debug on October 2, 2013 at 12:48 PM · Report this
how about you don't teach your kids to jaywalk?
Posted by woofy on October 2, 2013 at 1:26 PM · Report this
Honestly, I, Anon, if you're going to let random assholes on the street bother you enough to write some screed to The Stranger, maybe you should move out of the city? Or to Portland, which has a much smaller population of random assholes than Seattle.
Posted by Arthur Zifferelli on October 2, 2013 at 3:45 PM · Report this
I love that we live in a city where half the population is strung out on drugs and the other half won't even jaywalk. It truly is the freaks vs. the geeks out here.
Posted by Seattle, you're truly bizarre on October 2, 2013 at 7:20 PM · Report this
inquiastador 8
@7 no kidding! I suggest unloading a serious "Fuck Off!" To anyone getting all preachy. What are they gonna do, really? Besides, I doubt this person was trying to cross the street, frogger style, with kids in tow. That would be different.
Posted by inquiastador on October 2, 2013 at 7:58 PM · Report this
lolorhone 9
A "Get the fuck out of my face" said from the chest usually works. They already think you're an unfit parent, might as well throw profanity in the mix.
Posted by lolorhone on October 3, 2013 at 4:30 AM · Report this
I was jogging with my son in a stroller on a very quiet street. The sidewalk was all broken and rough, so for a block I ran on the smooth street. A passerby harangued me in a similar "you are not a fit parent" way. I barked at him to mind his own fucking business. He looked like he was about to swallow his own tongue.
Posted by ohthetrees on October 3, 2013 at 12:07 PM · Report this
Sounds like a typical Seattle-ite. They should grow a pair and learn to jay-walk like the rest of America.
Posted by LMNOP on October 3, 2013 at 7:41 PM · Report this
TCLballardwallymont 12
Yes, it's so incredibly dangerous to cross a street at a non-governmentally sanctioned time and/or place. Dear god citizen, any one of the millions of invisible speeding deathmobiles that mow down thousands of anarchists like you every day could have come along. Won't anyone (besides catholic republicans) think of the children?!
Posted by TCLballardwallymont on October 3, 2013 at 8:55 PM · Report this
Strangers calling out other strangers for jaywalking seems to be a Seattle phenomenon. +1 @11 and similar sentiments.
Posted by z26 on October 4, 2013 at 12:15 AM · Report this
Clearly, it is time for martial law in this country.....
Posted by antonlavey on October 4, 2013 at 7:02 PM · Report this
There's jay walking, and then there's va-jay-jay walking. What's really going on here?
Posted by MacGruber on October 4, 2013 at 11:12 PM · Report this
Oh please, tell us more about how enlightened and smart Stranger readers are. I was on your side up until that point. Maybe they should take your baby away.
Posted by treehugger on October 5, 2013 at 9:15 AM · Report this
17 Comment Pulled (Spam) Comment Policy
Should have told the guy that the kids were on enough COCAINE and MALT LIQUOR that they would never notice if they were hit by a car
Posted by Gay Movie Fan on October 6, 2013 at 8:18 PM · Report this
Fenrox 19
What i like about NYC is that that shit does not happen. You can be passive aggressive if you want, nobody cares, but if someone "steps" to you in such a way, you can FREAK OUT. In NYC nobody will help or stop you until you go 5 seconds past too far and even then it's iffy. I have no idea about Seattle, if anyone would try to "help".

One time a tourist called the cops and train driver while I was on the subway because some junkie lady was stabbing herself in the arm lightly with a needle. Creepy but in no way more than it was, she wasn't drawing blood or anything. The guy was a tourist and he wanted to get her help and we all just reamed him apart. All he did was stop the train for 45 min, cops cant stop her, she fought back for her rights and we all let the guy (with whom we pleaded to not report the whole thing before it went down) never get comfortable. NEVER HELP, if you want to help so damn bad give people money, everybody can use money.
Posted by Fenrox on October 8, 2013 at 2:48 PM · Report this
Fenrox, please go back to New York.
Posted by Arthur Zifferelli on October 8, 2013 at 6:43 PM · Report this
@12: Catholics and Republicans already "Think About the Children" WAY TOO MUCH...and not in a good way....
Posted by Dr Gonzo on October 9, 2013 at 8:05 AM · Report this

All evidence to the contrary.
Posted by fuckyou1 on October 12, 2013 at 1:47 PM · Report this
so, anonymous, by your rules, if a person sees anyone with "their" kid doing anything they want to it--we have no cause to say anything as it is not "our" child. so this would include physical/sexual/emotional abuse? we should just let the parent do as they wish as the child is their property? basically, you walked your child into a crosswalk against the light and a driver didn't hit you but warned you that you were doing something dangerous. you were. dumbass. if it had gone differently, you would have been crying "why me? my child has been run over" asshole.
Posted by flequus on October 12, 2013 at 4:02 PM · Report this

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