I, Anonymous

Dear Hit-and-Run Victim

I, Anonymous

Steven Weissman

  • comments (32)
  • Print

Y ou stupid fucking moron. I was on a nice leisurely bike ride in the Mount Baker neighborhood when a man in a blue Cadillac gunned his engine to pass me and struck you in the middle of the crosswalk. You rolled off the hood and onto the sidewalk clutching your legs in obvious pain. The driver must have sensed your utter fucking stupidity because he immediately floored it and drove away. I wrote down the guy's license plate number and called the police, thinking this might turn out okay since quite a few people were witnesses. Then you got up, proclaimed that you've "been crossing this street for nine years and this has never happened before," limped to your car, and fucking drove away despite five people telling you to stop. What the fuck? You let that piece of shit get away, stick yourself with the medical bills, and waste my time waiting for a cop to show up and tell me there was nothing he could do if you weren't around to press charges? Fuck you. Now that the shithead who tried to run you over is off scot-free, I hope the next person he hits is you again.


Submit your unsigned confession or accusation here. Please remember to change the names of the innocent and guilty. One submission will be published in the paper and online every week.

Comments (32) RSS

Oldest First Unregistered On Registered On Add a comment
come on you guys can make up better shit than this
Posted by eraserpenis on January 15, 2014 at 9:21 AM · Report this
Dude - get a clue. The guy did not want to be involved with the police. Seems pretty obvious to me.
Posted by JJaayy112233 on January 15, 2014 at 9:40 AM · Report this
@ I, Anon:

First, can't you make up better shit than this?

And Second, maybe the dude was not interested in dealing with the pigs?
Posted by Arthur Zifferelli on January 15, 2014 at 12:41 PM · Report this
Probably had a warrant for his arrest or a pocket full of drugs or both.
Posted by HektorKamacho on January 15, 2014 at 1:16 PM · Report this
@4 yep!
Posted by ishf on January 15, 2014 at 2:02 PM · Report this
Being high on something would explain why
1) He got hit in the first place
2) He didn't want to deal with cops
3) He was able to get up and move along so quickly

Posted by DanFan503 on January 15, 2014 at 2:04 PM · Report this
Uh, I guess wanting to avoid police is a valid explanation. But I think this kind of thing is a form of panic behavior. People have a brush with death, are literally hurt, very scared, and just want to get home where they feel safe. Insurance and police reports and medical bills be damned. It's not rational behavior, no, it's panic behavior. You can't expect somebody whose been hit by a car to act rationally. Just putting that alternative out there.
Posted by GermanSausage on January 15, 2014 at 2:12 PM · Report this
rob! 8
Calling bullshit. IA submitter has presence of mind to take down the license number of a perp already speeding away, but not that of a victim staggering to his car, getting in, starting up, and pulling out?
Posted by rob! on January 15, 2014 at 2:26 PM · Report this
Pope Peabrain 9
There's a lot of desperate people out there.
Posted by Pope Peabrain on January 15, 2014 at 2:45 PM · Report this
I was on a bus when a teen kicked an old man in the head twice. We called the cops, but then the other riders started telling the old man that he really didn't want to talk to the cops, so he said nothing happened and he didn't want to press charges.

We have a problem if people are afraid of reporting crimes to the cops.
Posted by Hanoumatoi on January 15, 2014 at 3:12 PM · Report this
Some people really don't like cops. I had a friend get hit by a car a few years ago who was so anti-cop that he did the same thing and left when I said I was going to call them. They arrived and I called him and plead with him to come back and file a report but he refused to talk to the police.
Posted by s_monkey on January 15, 2014 at 3:18 PM · Report this
@10 maybe you didn't read the Stranger this week…

Then of course there's this previous I, Anonymous…
Posted by ishf on January 15, 2014 at 3:53 PM · Report this
What #7 said. I've been hit by cars as a pedestrian twice. I had the walk sign both times and the drivers were turning left while looking right for oncoming traffic while failing to check for pedestrians in the crosswalk. Both times, my flight response kicked in and my first instinct was just to get out of the car's path. And the drivers just drove off, as so many drivers tend to do these days. You are in shock when this kind of thing happens.
Posted by Way to blame the victim on January 15, 2014 at 4:03 PM · Report this
At any point did you bother to let this person know that you had notified the police on their behalf, or did the righteous indignation kick in as they stood up?
Posted by treehugger on January 15, 2014 at 4:23 PM · Report this
When I was a pedestrian struck by a hit and run motorist, the Seattle Police Department was never able to find the guy who hit me, despite a description of the driver, vehicle and the complete, admittedly out of state, license plate number. I am officially shit out of luck to this very day.

Strangely, my insurance company, perhaps motivated by my medical bills, found the car and driver with little delay.
Posted by Blame The Victim on January 15, 2014 at 5:40 PM · Report this
debug 16
There's enough a-holes on the planet for this story to be believable.

As others have pointed out (rudely as usual) the man wasn't obligated to go to the police. Sometimes you measure the wrong done against the hassle of reporting it and skip the hassle.

While you had your heart in the right place, it wasn't your choice to make in the end.
Posted by debug on January 15, 2014 at 5:50 PM · Report this
Is there a duty to report to protect future victims? If this is a pattern of behavior on the driver's part, is that something that should be ignored?

How many people are injured or killed each year when criminals escalate an established pattern that had been previously ignored or seen as too much hassle to report? Makes me think of the news interviews after a major crime. Everyone says they knew something was wrong with that guy, but they never put it all together.
Posted by CobaltBlue on January 15, 2014 at 7:40 PM · Report this
@15 Good economic point, if the police identified the driver it would cost the city money to catch and prosecute him. No value for them in that.

Your insurance company, on the other hand, could recover at least some of your bills from the driver's insurance company or squeezing him personally.
Posted by Homple on January 15, 2014 at 9:47 PM · Report this
There is actually a decent chance that the driver was putting himself through hell by constantly looking over his shoulder in a sweat-soaked panic every time he heard a noise, positive it was the cops showing up to arrest him for the hit and run,and is now off scot-free after reading this in the Stranger.
Posted by clint on January 15, 2014 at 9:53 PM · Report this
My mother was hit by a car, said she was OK, and went to work bloody. She works at a hospital, and her colleagues made her go to the ER because she was obviously in shock. Instead of blaming the guy who got hit, you could have tried to convince him to wait for some medical help. Sounds like you're more interested in punishing the hitter than helping the victim.
Posted by Yozka on January 16, 2014 at 6:51 AM · Report this
@I, Anon, what kind of car were you driving when you hit that pedestrian? I mean, this is obviously you fishing for potential witnesses and then reframing it with you as the valiant bike rider who is only there to help...
Posted by Clickety Clack 129483763 on January 16, 2014 at 11:50 AM · Report this
He probably did not want to meet the police. He may have been on drugs or on a lamb.
Posted by MacGruber on January 16, 2014 at 7:29 PM · Report this
The last two or three dozen I, Anons have been pretty lame.
Posted by Arthur Zifferelli on January 16, 2014 at 8:01 PM · Report this
I watched a pit bull attack an elderly lady outside the kayak shop on Alki were I was working. White tissue was visible from the wound. She didn't want to call the police. Panic behavior might explain that because I sure can't. I rode the piece of shit and his dog down and told him to deal with the situation. Of course he ignored me. The lady refused to call or let us call the police despite our obvious exasperation. I believe this I anon.
Posted by wingfold on January 17, 2014 at 2:30 AM · Report this
The lady refused to call or let us call the police despite our obvious exasperation.
She could not have refused to let you call. She could have asked you not to call, but you should have done so anyway.

Years ago in Portland, I saw a bum get rolled, hit the sidewalk, and start bleeding profusely. A few yuppie do-gooders standing around kept telling me "he said he didn't want medical...".

"Tough shit", I told them. It's not up to him if *I* call medical for him. And he did need medical.

Sometimes people don't know what's best for them, especially in trauma situations.
Posted by Arthur Zifferelli on January 18, 2014 at 1:01 PM · Report this
he was in shock. he had just been hit by a car. being in shock does not make a person a moron. the morons were all the people who let a person in shock and injured drive off in his car. possibly injuring someone else. there were morons in this story but it was the narrator and the bystanders. the moron was YOU, anonymous. learn some basics about an injury before pointing the moron finger, moron. you suck with your sanctimonious bullshit. your TIME was wasted? spare us the first world boo-hoo. fuck off. you are mad at yourself for not being ballsy enough to take the keys from the injured person--don't blame others for your cowardice. YOUR inaction possibly injured other people as YOU were NOT in shock. you have no excuse, so you blame the victim. classy.
Posted by flequus on January 18, 2014 at 7:26 PM · Report this
doloresdaphne 27
I was hit by a car (my fault) that was coming out of a driveway. It knocked me off my bike, and the injury was minor but I was in shock.

And thought the guy offered to help me and take me to a doctor, I really wasn't up for having to make a judgement as to whether I needed help or not, ( I didn't know) so my default instinct was to insist I was fine, and get away. Even though I was a bit hurt, and didn't know for sure if I was going to be ok or not, I was more concerned with minimising embarrassment.

Having a stranger inconvenience them self to look after you is awkward, especially when it's your fault.
Posted by doloresdaphne on January 18, 2014 at 9:32 PM · Report this
Thank you, #26. Great comment!
Posted by DrummerGrrl on January 19, 2014 at 12:17 AM · Report this
People do funny things when they're in shock, including not wanting help from strangers.
You should have taken both license plates, then asked the police to find the victim, too, if you were that bothered by it all.
Posted by Chandira on January 20, 2014 at 4:26 PM · Report this
@16: If you would like everything sugarcoated, might I suggest trying a different internet?
Posted by treehugger on January 21, 2014 at 11:14 AM · Report this
Yeah, fuck that guy for being in shock and unable to think clearly!
Thank God you were a good Seattleite and passively stood by, right comrade?
Posted by Tard on February 4, 2014 at 3:38 PM · Report this
Why are you so nasty? What on earth happened to make you judge people so cruelly? This from a citizen of a stolen nation with the right to carry weapons?
Posted by DieselEstate on February 5, 2014 at 8:34 PM · Report this

Add a comment