I was wicked shitty and crazy to you. It sucks, and I'm sorry and embarrassed. I think about it often, and I've come up with some reasons I couldn't admit the ongoing stuff with your ex was about you, not about me being unworthy. I just wanted you so hard that I was incapable of admitting we couldn't have a relationship fully ours, so I tried to maneuver in, which of course backfired. You should know I saw the cute photos you sent her daily. I saw the text when you complained to her that you couldn't hang out because I had "already roped you into something." It was also thrilling the one time I met your mom. When we went camping on a couple days' notice with her whole family, I felt alienated and alone, running away to cry on the beach by myself every chance I got. You promised you and I would take our own trip, but you dumped me instead. All of that I thought was about me, when really it was about you. Trying to be where I didn't belong turned me into a crazy bitch. I'm sincerely sorry. I still miss you.

—Anonymous



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