Your Wedding Sucks
You used Papyrus as a font on your wedding invite. We can get past that. Asking for money instead of gifts so you can fund your honeymoon AND your fucking trip to Burning Man? It's tacky and obnoxious, but I'll let it slide. But charging for food, booze, and "carnival games"? Encouraging people to bring a guest... as long as the guest pays 20 bucks into a "wedding gift box" at the door?! The note encouraging photographer-friends to work for free and send you digital files was a nice touch. But this part's REALLY special: I found out that some people got a "ticket" with their invitation, entitling them to a wristband and a VIP area with free food. You have been going to shitty festivals for too long and you are confused. I am not going to pay at the door, pay for my drinks, pay for food, watch you get married, and then watch other people get into the VIP area. I can't wait to see what kind of hustle you're gonna try to pull when you get knocked up. Guess what: If you can't afford a big fancy wedding, you have a potluck and a ceremony in the backyard with your closest friends. Sure, maybe you couldn't invite everyone and throw a carnival, but it would be meaningful and wouldn't leave half the people you know horrified and embarrassed.