You are older than me, it is true. You have done more drugs than me, it is true. You lived through 'Nam and you know how to cheat on your taxes without getting caught, and you know a hell of a lot about a hell of a lot. But dude, I'm sorry, I KNOW MORE ABOUT COMPUTERS THAN YOU DO.

I understand that you want to be in control all the time, I understand that you want to seem "cool" and "hip" and "with it"--but shut the fuck up and let me fix the damn computer! Don't pretend that you know how to set up a proxy server!! Don't pretend you know what the TCI/IP settings should be!! No matter HOW long you sit there clicking on shit, I can STILL fix it faster and better than you can. Just who do you think is going to be impressed by your "technological knowledge"? Like Mom could give a crap!! She knows that the real reason why you don't call tech support anymore is that you're too goddamn cheap! Wake up and smell the failure, man! Stop dickin' around and realize that your 20-year-old daughter can definitively kick your ass when it comes to that fuckin' outdated IBM-compatible.

--Anonymous