Steven Weissman

You cheat on me and tell me it's my fault because I wasn't very good at sex. (Sorry for not liking anal.) We break up, and you start going out with her because she's so much better than I am. (Anal is her favorite.) She is going to cheat on you, because she is the kind of girl who will knowingly fuck someone else's boyfriend.

Oh look, she did. Six years later.

It is not necessarily wrong to still be attracted to teenagers. (I know you like them small and naive. I'm still small, no longer naive.) It is not necessarily wrong to look for sex online. (Everyone you know also knows you're a cheater, so you're not getting any.) The combination of the two is going to get you arrested.

Oh look, it did.