IF YOU ARE QUEER and CONSIDERING A VISIT TO A STRAIGHT BAR
Tools
1. Reevaluate your motives. Why do you hate yourself?
2. Take along your mace, your judo lessons, and the ACLU's 800 number.
3. Don't attract undue negative attention. Leave the cha-cha pumps at home.
4. If a guy keeps staring at you, don't get excited. He's not flirting, he's considering homicide.
5. Don't mock the music, clothes, or dancers until you are at a safe distance.
6. Dress down.
7. Don't look too good or dance too well. Straight men are violent when intimidated.
8. Don't look too good or dance too well. Straight women are clueless and will hit on you.
9. Don't do anything you would naturally do.
10. Don't.
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