"I feel powerless, angry and violated. Please help me. Two months ago Mark Taylor-Canfield borrowed my Camcorder and accessories. He will not, cannot, does not, has not returned them. All I get are excuses. If you're a friend of his, please talk to him." -- Typewritten note from anti-WTO über-activist Carroll Jackson, posted on the door of the Direct Action Network (DAN) offices on Fourth Avenue between Stewart and Virginia.

Will the Real Democrat Please Stand Up?

Thankfully, on March 28, the King County Democrats didn't act on a cloying (and stupid) recommendation from their official endorsement committee to support both U.S. Senate Democratic primary rivals: new economy enthusiast Maria Cantwell and safe economy advocate Deborah Senn. Let the mud-wrestling begin.

Keystroke of Genius

Whoever Brendalee Fox is, she's brilliant. Fox bought the domain name Amazom.com for her Internet bookstore, betting on typos to boost hits to the site. Amazon.com is suing Fox in federal court, claiming that Amazon consumers (who can't spell) "are being misled and confused."

Microsoft Violates the Sherman Antitrust Act to Monopolize the Web-Browser Market

DUH.

Impending Doom

Plunging nearly 15 percent, Microsoft stock fell from 106 and 2/8 to 90 and 7/8 on Monday. The drop, a nervous reaction to the unfolding antitrust suit, represented a 24 percent dive from the company's 52-week high of 119 and 15/16. This means that your Microsoft friend, the one who's been throwing your budget out of whack by dragging you to Canlis for filet mignon dinners, got hit with a personal one-day correction to the tune of $5,000 on average.

Sleepless in City Hall

In an annual standoff, on Friday, March 31, homeless advocates rallied in front of city hall to protest the summer closure of 130 publicly funded shelter beds. Advocates also set up tents in Beacon Hill to help make up for the temporary loss of beds.

School Discipline

Apparently, Seattle schools have not been treating disabled students or the students' lawyers very well. Last month, two student plaintiffs filed federal suits to collect a combined total of about $70,000 in unpaid attorney fees, after both won their cases against the school district for failing to meet the students' special education needs. "It's frustrating because Seattle tends not to be cooperative in these matters," says Stacy Gillett, a spokesperson for one of the jilted attorneys.

-- Compiled by The Stranger news staff