From the Nov 2 – Nov 8, 2000 issue

Columns

It's My Party

by Kathleen Wilson

Would someone please teach the thuggish population of Pennsylvania some manners, for crying out loud? First we had dumbshit frat guys trying to kick Botch's ass in Pittsburgh. Now we've got word that a big, retarded security doofus working the door at Philadelphia's Theater of Living Arts punched At the Drive-In's tiny Omar in the Afro, prompting tourmates Murder City Devils' bassist (and all-around great friend) Derek Fudesco to jump in and show the offending idiot, and the club that employed him, who the tough guy really was that night. Apparently the security gorilla--reports say he was HUGE--failed to recognize Omar as part of the night's entertainment and refused to let him into the club, no matter how much the Lilliputian guitarist begged and pleaded. (It must be noted at this very juncture that even Louis Braille would recognize At the Drive-In, who sold out the show.) Assessing the situation to be hopeless, Omar did what any headliner repeatedly denied entry to his own show would do: He barged right in. This was too much for Testosterone Tony to take, so he did what any thick-headed door guy would do: He called Omar a "faggot" and punched him in the back of the head. All hell broke loose as Fudesco, a strapping lad of 6'7", jumped on the offender's back and took him down. At the Drive-In and the Murder City Devils then refused to take the stage until the police were summoned, and the club's hateful doorman was finally hauled away in handcuffs! See, it always pays to comport oneself with grace and humility. Washington 2; Pennsylvania 0.

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Okay, the jig is up (to speak in Dennis DeYoung parlance). As much as I would like it to be true, as much as I will it to be true, as much as I kick myself daily for not having handcuffed him to my bed when he showed up (gloriously drunk on red wine) at my birthday party a couple of years back, William Reid does not live in West Seattle. (Best birthday memory EVER: walking into my bedroom to find William and his brother Jim lounging about in vintage fur coats purloined from my closet.) In fact, he and his wife and child live in L.A. Which means all the effort my pal Kim and I have put into getting 'Liam's attention-- resulting in a trip to the ER and repeated exasperated responses from U.S. West Directory Assistance operators--was for naught. Alas, that light of hope has ceased to shine, but there is more star power to take its place. Not only do several Sub Pop bigwigs make their residence in West Seattle, but various members of past and present bands like Gruntruck, Tad, Night Kings, Critters Buggin, and Murder City Devils live over the bridge, too.