EJACULATION

Dear Editor: I am a pro-choice, anti-handgun, atheist Republican (a living oxymoron?) who will vote for John McCain in November. Nevertheless, I think Eli Sanders's pharmacopoeia ["Rx for Election Anxiety Disorder," Sept 18] may be one of the finest pieces of satire ever written, unless you consider its topicality a detraction. Jonathan Swift must be ejaculating in his grave.

G. C. Inman Jr.

NOW DANCING

EDITOR: While I enjoyed your article about the impending demise of WaMu ["Broken Bank," Sept 25], one fact everyone seems to have forgotten is the time during the third (or fourth?) monorail campaign when WaMu descended from its ivory tower to fight the new monorail line with political connections and money. At the time I declared karmic jihad on them, vowing never to do business with them again and to dance on their grave when they fell. Now it seems they will fall, and naturally my reaction as a citizen concerned about the financial health of both my country and my community is HAHAHAHAHAHA.

Hal Colombo

OBVIOUSLY SMUG

Dear Brendan Kiley: Regarding your TV-movie version of gonzo journalism ["A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to McCain's Speech," Sept 11].

A. Don't eat veal, way uncool.

B. You don't need to tell us you feel smug, it's obvious.

C. How about showing us at least one ball and tell us the name of the delegate from Georgia if he exists.

D. Janitors are not on the maintenance crew. There is a difference. But hey, since I never met a janitor or maintenance worker with a college-boy name like Brendan, I shouldn't be surprised at this misunderstanding.

E. Red lights and other laws keep us from killing each other more.

F. We all look typecast, stop kidding yourself.

Tony Horn

SERIOUS SUCKAGE

EDITOR: The Chow section has started to seriously suck, from Jonah's review of the best taco trucks in Seattle (wow! four trucks, ones that he had already visited, one that he bitches about on the Slog constantly) ["Truckin'," Jonah Spangenthal-Lee, July 24] to Bethany's Slog-rewrite of the pig kill ["The Beauty of the Beast," Bethany Jean Clement, Sept 4]. Boring, boring, boring. Eat & Tell was an awesome column and now there's no reason to read the food section. And Bethany's little quip in the Poppy blurb ("The woman whose pants caught fire in the conflagration—pain at the pump, indeed—is recovering") [Suggests, Bethany Jean Clement, Sept 18] is in very poor taste and disgustingly unfunny, considering Martha Manning's condition.

Ashleigh N. Baker

WONDERFUL

EDITOR: As anyone with pit bulls will tell you, these dogs are WONDERFUL family dogs ["Pit Bullies," Jonah Spangenthal-Lee, Sept 18]. Like any pet, these dogs need to be raised in a loving home. Too frequently this breed falls into the wrong hands and that is where the aggressive dogs come from. I do, however, believe that strict guidelines should be followed in order to protect both dogs and owners. This may not be the breed for everyone, but for those of us who are responsible enough to take on the rewarding challenge of having one, these dogs are the BEST!!! Please do not allow irresponsible owners who only keep this breed for a status symbol ruin it for those of us who love and care for them as members of our family. We LOVE our pitiful bulls :):):)

Anonymous

BORED

HI: While the tried and true methods of sarcastic repartee have served The Stranger well for decades and I have happily read along, I feel, perhaps in part thanks to some of the activities I will discuss, that you guys must be getting bored. That guide to school and life and whatever else it is fine young readers do with ourselves [2008 Back to School Guide, Sept 18]—and really plenty of other esoteric reviews of this or that basement event—disregards one thing. It is something that would surely stand in the way of criticizing/critiquing anything at all, but let me just say this: Those who enjoy binging on Joose in public, going to see aging alt-rockers from Texas, moshing, throwing food off of balconies, and generally being a juvenile clown may also be capable of enjoying reading said esoteric reviews in coffee shops, lurking in used bookstores and libraries, engaging in discussions with meaning and direction, phone-stumping for nonprofits, or just riding a ferry back and forth watching wind ripples and clouds. Really nothing new, this reader just felt maybe someone wouldn't get too upset at a reminder that maybe you're right, but maybe some people enjoy all the sides of all the fences.

Some Arrogant, Spoiled Islander