Nacho Picasso is headlining an all-ages show at Neumos on Friday, March 8, and he's bringing the whole Moor Gang—which includes Jarv Dee, Gift Uh Gab, Thaddeus David, Steezie Nasa, Cam the Mac, Chief, J Bird (and I'm sure I'm forgetting hella others). Very simpatico to their movement are Key Nyata and Keyboard Kid, both also performing. I know that Nacho is not for everybody, just like Macklemore ain't, THEESatisfaction ain't, and so forth—and peace to everybody who feels the need to tell me as much at length. But for those who do appreciate the chamber he's carved out with Blue Sky Black Death, Raised by Wolves, and Eric G, this will be a very sanctified church function.

How did Sir Michael Rocks, FKA one of the Cool Kids (playing Neumos), and LA's Vince Staples (playing Vera Project) end up in town on the same night (Sunday, March 10) and not be on the same bill? You got a lot of kids eating their snapbacks out of frustration right now, creasing the toe boxes of their 90s all up and everything. I'm just saying, there are a lot of anguished emoticons flying through the ether right now, a lot of kids drawing fat tears on their Snapchat selfies, and it could've been prevented. If you see a gaggle of high schoolers equidistant from Seattle Center and Capitol Hill, straight looking like Tumblr, not sure which way to go, just know that y'all shoulda stopped, collaborated, and listened... to your heart.

Tuesday, March 12, LA-based MC Wax is playing a sold-out show at the Crocodile. (Fellow monosyllabic rappers MC Type and Portland's Tope open up.) Wax's publicist hit me up; he asked me to picture Eminem meets Beastie Boys meets Sublime— I guess he really wanted me to know that the guy is white—but it's only really the last one that fits, as he does kind of try to rap and sing like Brad Nowell. He sure likes those spicy Latina girls—like on the mariachi-tinged "Rosana"—and hates his ex, an "Asian slut" who (on "She Used to Be Mine") he imagines fucking an entire mariachi band (this guy has a real fetish for charro suits). Basically, the bros who used to rap in college-town funk/rap bands and stan for Atmosphere are coming for theirs—meanwhile, the blues people are just making a run for The Trap. This is the part where "we used to switch it up," like the big homie said once, so where are we with all that?

The bro-rap wave really is upon us, and with the popular support ($$$) it enjoys, there will be no stopping it. Once rap is fully Bieberized, what's BET going to play? (A: Mac Miller videos—and you're gonna fucking love it.) It is what it is, and good for those good folks who do benefit from it. It just ain't for me, and not just because I graduated high school the same year Pac died. (And for what?) TLDR: I can't shake the feeling that the voice of the have-nots has officially been had. Have a nice day. recommended