Keith Mokris

Aw naw, big Snoop Dogg is coming to sprinkle chronic crumbs throughout the town. He's rocking Showbox Sodo on March 5 (with Helladope and Grynch), but that shit already sold out, so if you want to see the Doggfather live and lanky in person, you'd better get tickets to the just-added March 6 show. Just make sure you don't try to get onstage with the guy—remember dude who alleges he got beat down after he tried to run up on Snoop at a show at the White River Amphitheatre some five years ago? Snoop's upside your head—so you better lay low.

Mere days after that, the pants get a little skinnier, the shoes get a little less Chuck Taylor–y. That's right, haircuts, Chicago's the Cool Kids and L.A.'s Pac Div are hitting Showbox at the Market on March 9. This will be a good deal—that Pac Div Church League Champions tape definitely got plenty of burn out here, and they haven't been through for a little while. Also, Cool Kids Mikey Rocks and Chuck Inglish have shown some welcome topical growth as they ready their forthcoming album, When Fish Ride Bicycles, so expect more than an hour-long eBay commercial. I hope. But goddamn, some of you streetwear/sneaker-heads trip me out for real. I don't know how you fucktard fashionistas can have fun when you're that worried about creasing the toe box of your deadstock Js or spilling a drink on your T-shirt with, like, rap lyrics on it (which was ripped off from another line's shirt in the first place) that you don't even know the origin of. But maybe I'm really speaking to an outdated archetype here—I don't think those kids even dress quite like that anymore. And you shouldn't judge a whole group of people anyway, because it leaves no room for an essential truth: They're people. With their own set of circumstances, struggles, and lessons to learn. So next time you (or I) want to fly off at the lip about "hipsters," "gangbangers" (lol), or even "Juggalos" (guilty), you (and I) would be better off showing some empathy. Unless they disrespect you or your folks. Then fuck 'em.

Anyway, on March 10, Sportn' Life Records' hefty roster takes over the Comet Tavern—we're talking D.Black, Fatal Lucciauno, Spaceman, SK, and Marissa. I'm excited for this—honestly, my favorite SnL artist sets have always been the ones they've rocked together, D-Block-style, just rotating through all the different styles and personalities that the Life is rich with (just having different perspectives and flows in one label/camp is why they're conceptually miles ahead of you guys who will cram 15 nonpersonalities with the same style into matching T-shirts and call it a roster). D.Black's the spiritual uplifter, the moral compass to his tribe; Fatal, the unrepentant yet haunted G with the spiritual weight of the block bearing on his back; Space, the fly, audacious hood playboy; SK, one of the newer additions, still finding his voice and lane; Marissa, a talented singer, much the same. Go get some. Life, love, and nappiness to you all. recommended