New Column!
Previously in New Column!
October 20, 2009
October 13, 2009
October 6, 2009
1
Nice to see the Trolley Tryst couple can at least pay back their fine. (Which, BTW, they didn't get, as according to friends of the couple the transit cop who busted them didn't quite see what was going on, so they got off with little more than a warning.)
2
you need to mention DAN SAVAGE in there at least 6 more times. Maybe toss in some McGinn as well since that's all you are good for.
3
Congrats to all the winners -- they were all great. Except maybe Cyclust, which seemed like it might have been sexy but was way too painful to watch with that horrid drunk-epileptic video effect applied to the entire thing. Did anyone actually manage to watch the screen the whole time?
4
Congrats to Lynn Shelton and all that (because Beyond Gay was pretty damn funny after all), but I just can't condone a nudity-free, non-porn taking the top prize... especially for the second year in a row! What are all the prospective pornographers supposed to take from this? That real porno can't be funny?
5
Huge congrats to the Housewives folk and the Please your man people. They're stuff was great! Funny as Beyond Gay was though, I'm disappointed it won because not only is the director a professional film maker in an amateur festival...but it's pretty much the lesbian processing movie that won last year revisited. Also no nudity as well as no actual sex. Boo.
7
kind of surprised at the winners, esp the Funniest ones...Beyond Gay was sweet, but slight and Dance Belt was charming (how could it not be with that cast) but not very original and went on about two minutes longer than it needed to...
8
Might be time to reconsider the voting categories. Weird that "Dance Belt" walked away with an award while some of the more well-made films such as "Incubus" weren't recognized.
9
@8,
Agreed. Incubus was a hell of a film, but, uh... funny? hot? HUMP! needs an Artsiest category, or something.
Agreed. Incubus was a hell of a film, but, uh... funny? hot? HUMP! needs an Artsiest category, or something.
10
Nice choices for all the winners... except I can't remember what Beyond Gay was. Little help, anyone?
11
I'm curious to know how close the votes were. The premiere I went to, the audience was roaring at How To Please your Man and less reactive to Beyond Gay. I agree with the folks dissapointed in the lack of "porn" in Beyond Gay, but of course it was audience vote.
12
#10
Being that you don't remember Beyond Gay, which one did you think was funniest?..just curious.
Beyond Gay was the one with the lesbian and the gay guy sitting in bed trying to figure out how to relieve their horniness, to no avail.
Being that you don't remember Beyond Gay, which one did you think was funniest?..just curious.
Beyond Gay was the one with the lesbian and the gay guy sitting in bed trying to figure out how to relieve their horniness, to no avail.
13
I loved Incubus, but I didn't feel like it was made for HUMP. Which is why I didn't vote for it. I feel bad for Dance Belt because the dancing was so very good and the cast was so very cute and the piece of shit camera didn't do any of it justice. Beyond Gay was way better then Hump Day. But really how much credit can you give to Lynn when it is actors with good chemistry making the jokes and improvising the scenes? I mean it’s jump cuts for fuck sakes.
But all in all woo! for HUMP. It's a really wonderful time. Funny, scary, interesting, arousing way better then most movies.
But all in all woo! for HUMP. It's a really wonderful time. Funny, scary, interesting, arousing way better then most movies.
14
Mattini, Beyond Gay was the gay guy and the lesbian sitting in bed together trying to figure out how to get eachother off. I laughed so hard the entire time. It was like a memory of highschool for me!
16
I thought Incubus should have won a prize for breaking out of the smirking, "we're only kidding" confines that most of the other entries stuck with. It wasn't sexy, or funny, but it was the film that made the ticket price more than worth it.
Maybe they need an "Artsiest" category?
Maybe they need an "Artsiest" category?
17
I thought Incubus should have won a prize for breaking out the smirking "we're only kidding" box that most of the other entries stayed inside. It wasn't sexy, or funny, but it was the film that made the ticket price well worth it.
Maybe they need an "Artsiest" category?
Maybe they need an "Artsiest" category?
20
Beyond Gay and Dancebelt were GREAT but people really need to start voting for actual amateur porn, otherwise Hump will turn into R-rated sex comedy festival.
PS: Incubus was a pretentious piece of crap - cheesy MTV video masquerading as erotic art. I wanted the ET sequel and the singing penis to win. Or the Sex Positions 101 or whatever it was called. Or the dumpster gay porn (middle-eastern music will never sound the same).
PS: Incubus was a pretentious piece of crap - cheesy MTV video masquerading as erotic art. I wanted the ET sequel and the singing penis to win. Or the Sex Positions 101 or whatever it was called. Or the dumpster gay porn (middle-eastern music will never sound the same).
23
Thanks 12, 14. But I also watched in Portland and don't remember Beyond Gay at all. I was at the 7:00 showing at Friday... if it got left out, bummer.
I laughed heartily at several... Dance Belt started the show perfectly. I also loved The Modern Housewife and Sex Moves 102 (not sure on the title, but the one with all the new positions).
I laughed heartily at several... Dance Belt started the show perfectly. I also loved The Modern Housewife and Sex Moves 102 (not sure on the title, but the one with all the new positions).
24
@22 If you want to see the sequel to Douche: Dry & Sandy, which wasn't accepted to HUMP this year, then go to MAGNUM at Rebar on Saturday night. It will be premiering there.
25
beyond bad voting...geezus people! beyond gay was funny but it certainly was not the funniest and barely porn. the larry king clip was so well edited and, er - totally hot so really, there's your winner. further to that was the SLUT riders as that fucking trolly is empty most of the time...'cept those transit poh poh.
modern housewife was pretty damn steamy too. yay HUMP!
modern housewife was pretty damn steamy too. yay HUMP!
26
@20 I voted for Sex Positions 101 and feel it was robbed.
I agree with most people in enjoying Dance Belt and Beyond Gay, but I didn't want to vote for ones that were obviously pretty professional. Let's give the amateurs love at the Amateur porn festival.
When I heard that the sequel to Douche: Dry and Sandy was left out because it looked too professional I was even more upset.
Incubus was interesting. It added an element that was missing in previous Hump!s.
I agree with most people in enjoying Dance Belt and Beyond Gay, but I didn't want to vote for ones that were obviously pretty professional. Let's give the amateurs love at the Amateur porn festival.
When I heard that the sequel to Douche: Dry and Sandy was left out because it looked too professional I was even more upset.
Incubus was interesting. It added an element that was missing in previous Hump!s.
28
#23 I was at the 7pm show in Portland and yes Beyond Gay did play. You must have been out back before the show smoking that stuff with #15?
29
None of the friends I went to HUMP with remember Beyond Gay either. It must have not been shown at my screening, lame!
30
@28 arrgh, this is actually driving me crazy. How do 4 of us have no recollection of the funniest film? One of us was a straight dude and I was positive he'd remember anything lesbian-related, too.
31
@20 "Incubus was a pretentious piece of crap - cheesy MTV video masquerading as erotic art."
This is clearly an unpopular opinion, but I thought Incubus was pretty cheesy too, or at least, way too slick and overproduced to be sexy or interesting to me.
"How to Please your Man" and "The Modern Housewife" were my favorites. I'm glad to see both of these films win awards. I've only been to one other HUMP!, a couple of years ago, but it definitely seems like the overall quality has shot up significantly since then.
This is clearly an unpopular opinion, but I thought Incubus was pretty cheesy too, or at least, way too slick and overproduced to be sexy or interesting to me.
"How to Please your Man" and "The Modern Housewife" were my favorites. I'm glad to see both of these films win awards. I've only been to one other HUMP!, a couple of years ago, but it definitely seems like the overall quality has shot up significantly since then.
32
#30 I was there Saturday, 7pm, Cinema 21, Portland, Oregon, U.S.A. :) I remember it specifically. Two people (gay guy and lesbian) sitting up in bed together. Single camera angle the whole time. Funny dialogue. Settled for breakfast rather than "relief".
34
...and I count one orgasm in the funny winners. A porn festival with six prizes, and one orgasm. Not hawt.
35
Okay, I liked Incubus, but it seemed like the wrong platform... as did "Beyond Gay". Extremely funny, yes... but it was nothing like a porn. If it weren't for a dildo, you might see that on "MUST SEE THURSDAY" on NBC.
My vote for funniest was "How to Please Your Man". Absolute comedy and sexy. And editing! Wow.
My vote for funniest was "How to Please Your Man". Absolute comedy and sexy. And editing! Wow.
37
I think a cumshot category is def necessary for next year. That way ppl would actually have to cum in their pornos! @33 I agree 6 winners and 1 orgasm... that's pretty lame. Way to go How to Please Your Man, thanks for giving us the 1 cum shot scene out of the winners... you guys should of took 1st. Good times. Can't wait for next year!
38
If you're interested, check out the "Incubus" 10min version here:
www.pizzanfunk.com/incubus.html
www.pizzanfunk.com/incubus.html
43
Best Cum Shot? I know who I would have voted for that. I really liked the Larry King one though. I thought it hysterical (AND HOT!)
44
my co star and i attended humpfor the 1st time , mostly because our 6 minute film was dubbed "too long" (and our 5 minute version did not include the voodoo donuts and made in oregon intro ) , we wanted to see the ohter entries . we left feeling very confused as too why ours wasnt chosen and felt it wouldve been a lock for "hottest" . after watching all the other entries we thought thatmaybe our s was too "vanilla" being antirely a man/woman scene with just your standard g spot/clit play and some doggy style . but unlike most of the entries we actually HAD a money shot and showed alot more in our video. wouldve been nice if seattle had thier own local films and here in portland we saw only portland entries also maybe its just our re collection but it semed like 50% or moreof the entries were some type of gayporn-isnt there already an ENTIRE film fst just for that genre?? anyway we would love soke feedback form some ppl outside of our lifestyle community -- we got thoiusands of hits and postive cmmetns on AFF and from friends - but maybe ppl are just blowing smoke up our ? heres the link ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLlDrBQVg…
45
my co star and i attended humpfor the 1st time , mostly because our 6 minute film was dubbed "too long" (and our 5 minute version did not include the voodoo donuts and made in oregon intro ) , we wanted to see the ohter entries . we left feeling very confused as too why ours wasnt chosen and felt it wouldve been a lock for "hottest" . after watching all the other entries we thought thatmaybe our s was too "vanilla" being antirely a man/woman scene with just your standard g spot/clit play and some doggy style . but unlike most of the entries we actually HAD a money shot and showed alot more in our video. wouldve been nice if seattle had thier own local films and here in portland we saw only portland entries also maybe its just our re collection but it semed like 50% or moreof the entries were some type of gayporn-isnt there already an ENTIRE film fst just for that genre?? anyway we would love soke feedback form some ppl outside of our lifestyle community -- we got thoiusands of hits and postive cmmetns on AFF and from friends - but maybe ppl are just blowing smoke up our ? heres the link ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLlDrBQVg…
46
my co star and i attended humpfor the 1st time , mostly because our 6 minute film was dubbed "too long" (and our 5 minute version did not include the voodoo donuts and made in oregon intro ) , we wanted to see the ohter entries . we left feeling very confused as too why ours wasnt chosen and felt it wouldve been a lock for "hottest" . after watching all the other entries we thought thatmaybe our s was too "vanilla" being antirely a man/woman scene with just your standard g spot/clit play and some doggy style . but unlike most of the entries we actually HAD a money shot and showed alot more in our video. wouldve been nice if seattle had thier own local films and here in portland we saw only portland entries also maybe its just our re collection but it semed like 50% or moreof the entries were some type of gayporn-isnt there already an ENTIRE film fst just for that genre?? anyway we would love soke feedback form some ppl outside of our lifestyle community -- we got thoiusands of hits and postive cmmetns on AFF and from friends - but maybe ppl are just blowing smoke up our ? heres the link ... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLlDrBQVg…
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