June 24, 2010
Republicans I Have Fucked
Republicans I Have Fucked
The Stranger's 2010 Queer Issue
Illustrations by James Yamasaki and Robert Ullman
Tools
Republicans I Have Fucked
- The Stranger's 2010 Queer Issue
- The Nixon Supporter: What I Remember About My First Republican Fuck
- The Trophy Wife: To Say Nothing of the Woman in a Fur Coat at Bush's Inauguration, the Smirking NYU Student, and the Sexiest Girl in Third Grade
- The Nazi: To Say Nothing of the Log Cabin Republican and the Bossy Anesthesiologist
- The Catholic Schoolgirl: I Know I Was Supposed to Be Worshipping Jesus, but I Could Never Take My Eyes Off Mary
- The Military Men: What Is It with the Navy and Me?
- The Tea Party Tranny: How Donna Milo Is Fucking with Conservatives in Florida—and Why I'm All for It
- The Guy with a Condo in Bellevue: I Didn't Really Understand What Was Different About Him Until I Wandered into His Living Room After Sex
- The Former Governor of Alaska: A Fantasy
- The Pastor from Renton: It Was All Well and Good Until Someone Walked In On Us
- I Have Never Fucked a Republican: ...Even Though I Grew Up in the South
- Fuck the Republican Party: How to Win the War They're Waging on Us
- A Field Guide to Conservative Closet Cases
- Homo Parties! Rugby Matches! Nightclubs! Sex Clubs! Full Pride Calendar
Hello and welcome to The Stranger’s 487th annual Queer Issue, this year devoted to the queerest thing in the world: Republicans!
Inside you’ll find a plethora of homosexuals holding forth on “Republicans I Have Fucked,” from Edmund White’s shtupping a Nixon supporter to Gina Young’s obsession with a GOP trophy wife to Susie Bright’s slash-fictional account of getting it on with Sarah Palin. Other bright-red fuckees here include a Nazi, military men, a pastor from Renton, a Bellevue condo-dweller... And, more figuratively, there’s Dan Savage’s guide to how to fuck the Republican party, plus the Republican Hypocrites Hall of Fame by David Schmader. And: more, more, MORE! Enjoy!
1
Is it too late to submit a story? I've got a good one about good times with a missionary, entitled "Mark of the Beast."
http://www.jimbo.info/weblog/archives/20…
Not necessarily GOP, but just as messed up.
http://www.jimbo.info/weblog/archives/20…
Not necessarily GOP, but just as messed up.
4
Re: @3
We are not pathetic.
The pieces are well-written and thought-provoking, a way of standing up for ourselves while grappling with the disconnect between physical attraction and political ideals.
Try hating yourself less.
We are not pathetic.
The pieces are well-written and thought-provoking, a way of standing up for ourselves while grappling with the disconnect between physical attraction and political ideals.
Try hating yourself less.
5
Re: @4
The world changes since your parents complained about Reagan. Try checking your premise. Kagan is an anti-porn crusader, Obama sends drones to bomb civilians, and, oh, how is one-party rule working for Washington?
A thing can be well-written and thoughtful while still being exasperatingly unaware.
No one is buying the BS "left-right" false choice anymore. The establishment left is just as dangerous and stupid as the establishment right. Until folks like those here start to realize that, expect to be relegated to the fringe and mockingly derided.
The world changes since your parents complained about Reagan. Try checking your premise. Kagan is an anti-porn crusader, Obama sends drones to bomb civilians, and, oh, how is one-party rule working for Washington?
A thing can be well-written and thoughtful while still being exasperatingly unaware.
No one is buying the BS "left-right" false choice anymore. The establishment left is just as dangerous and stupid as the establishment right. Until folks like those here start to realize that, expect to be relegated to the fringe and mockingly derided.
6
Ya know, Dan Savage, you are slowly beginning to evolve, but still a bit clueless, dood!
When you state that Obama is right on other issues, where the bloody hell is your head at???
Obama has appointed the most antiworker, antilabor, antiunion people possible.
The only scumbag he has yet to appoint to his administration is Dick Cheney, but he's really arbitrary given all of Obama's appointees.
You've got to quit falling for this "good-cop, bad-cop" strategy: Bush #1 unable to pass NAFTA, etc., so bring in good cop Clinton to pass NAFTA, GATT, China's entrance into the WTO, the WTO's Financial Services Agreement, the Gramm-Leach-Bliley Act of 1999, the Commodity Futures Modernization Act of 2000, the National Telecommunications Act of 1996, and overturning that ban on tuna fisheries which kill the dolphins, etc.
Bush #2 unable to privatize Social Security and the entire public educational system; bring in good cop Obama to get it done.
You focus on the nebulous and almost-arbitrary issue of Gay and Lesbian rights to the exclusion of what's really taking place, dood!
You're like those Black Americans who view everything from the racial perspective, completely oblivious to all else taking place.
Word up, dood! The day when neocon gaytards and corporate fascist lesbians can serve openly in the imperialist forces of America, or be employed openly in KBR's and Blackwater's (Xe's) torture squads, assassination squads and gangrape squads, won't help matters any!
Are you beginning to understand, or still clueless?
When you state that Obama is right on other issues, where the bloody hell is your head at???
Obama has appointed the most antiworker, antilabor, antiunion people possible.
The only scumbag he has yet to appoint to his administration is Dick Cheney, but he's really arbitrary given all of Obama's appointees.
You've got to quit falling for this "good-cop, bad-cop" strategy: Bush #1 unable to pass NAFTA, etc., so bring in good cop Clinton to pass NAFTA, GATT, China's entrance into the WTO, the WTO's Financial Services Agreement, the Gramm-Leach-Bliley Act of 1999, the Commodity Futures Modernization Act of 2000, the National Telecommunications Act of 1996, and overturning that ban on tuna fisheries which kill the dolphins, etc.
Bush #2 unable to privatize Social Security and the entire public educational system; bring in good cop Obama to get it done.
You focus on the nebulous and almost-arbitrary issue of Gay and Lesbian rights to the exclusion of what's really taking place, dood!
You're like those Black Americans who view everything from the racial perspective, completely oblivious to all else taking place.
Word up, dood! The day when neocon gaytards and corporate fascist lesbians can serve openly in the imperialist forces of America, or be employed openly in KBR's and Blackwater's (Xe's) torture squads, assassination squads and gangrape squads, won't help matters any!
Are you beginning to understand, or still clueless?
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May 21, 2013
1 comment »
Up & Coming
Lose your weird-ass “Wiggle Wiggle” stuff every night this week!
1 comment »
May 14, 2013
Post a comment »
Up & Coming
Lose your halfway-clever punch lines every night this week!
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