Who are the sexiest

people in Seattle?

We asked our readers to nominate Seattle's sexiest baristas, waiters, personal trainers, and movie theater employees. Hundreds of readers sent in nominations, and Stranger staffers fanned out all over the city. We tracked down "the barista with the nose ring at the Starbucks near Columbia Tower," "the hot guy who works at the Crest," and "Mark Fefer at Seattle Weekly." (Mr. Fefer appears to have engaged in a little ballot-box stuffing, as he received more nominations than any other person at Seattle Weekly. Nice try, Mark.)

We managed to track down and check out all of your nominees, and a crack team of Stranger beauty experts selected the winners.

Some observant readers asked why every category in this year's "Sexiest Seattleites" survey was for someone holding a marginal job, the kind of work a young person might get right out of high school--barista, street kid, managing editor at Seattle Weekly. This was no accident. Let's face facts, shall we? While young people may have the shittiest jobs, young people--and only young people--are sexy. Young people ooze sex. They can't help it. Older people--lawyers, politicians, and Mariners--are all too old to be sexy. And while people in their late 30s, 40s, and 50s may be handsome, while they may have "aged gracefully," and while they may be "well-preserved," they're just NOT sexy. Sean Connery is not sexy. Michael Douglas is not sexy. Sophia Loren is not sexy. You can call this ageist (which it may be), you can call it close-minded (which it definitely is), but above all else you should call it honest.

But lawyers, doctors, politicians, and Mariners should not despair! Unlike the established, well educated, and famous, young people can be had. Few are in stable, long-term relationships, and even if they are, they're usually more than willing to cheat on their partners. And what's more, all young people have their price. Older people may not have firm butts and thighs, but most have Visa cards and expendable income. Young people, on the other hand, are usually broke, and most would at least consider an offer from a potential sugar daddy or mommy. With these facts in mind, older readers shouldn't look on this issue as an insult, but as a sort of a catalog--an IKEA catalog filled with young, fleshy, available bodies.

Of course, we're not saying all (or any) of our winners can be literally bought. None of our winners work as prostitutes, and The Stranger does not condone prostitution. But unlike other magazines and their "sexiest people" issues filled with the rich and famous (think People, Us magazine, The Weekly Standard), The Stranger's Sexiest Seattleites are all young, local, and broke. With a little effort, Stranger readers young and old can track down our winners, wine and dine 'em, and who knows? For less than his average monthly mortgage payment, even Mr. Fefer might be able to take a winner home tonight.

Alongside our Sexiest Seattleites, you will find THOUSANDS of Valentines from Stranger readers to their one true loves. In fact, we received so many mash notes this year, we had to scatter them throughout the entire issue! So be sure to look for your Valentine in all parts of the paper. And if you're currently single or broken-hearted, come on down to The Stranger's Annual Pre-Valentine's Day Bash at Re-bar (1114 Howell St at Boren) on Wednesday, February 13. Bring a momento from your most recent failed relationship, and we'll smash it to bits onstage. The place will be packed with the single and the vulnerable, so who knows? You just might hook up with someone in time for V-Day. (And yes, the muscle guy will be there.)

The Stranger loves love almost as much as it loves firm, young bodies. This issue is our valentine to Seattle.

Love,

The Stranger

special thanks to sexy photograPhers

David Belisle, Casey Kelbaugh, Annie Marie Musselman, Victoria renard,

Megan Seling, and ADAM L. Weintraub